Sucky day
Weeeelllll I am sitting here at my computer and it is 10:48 am. And I am seriously stewing, majorly pissed at my mom. I haven't driven horses much at all this year, mostly because mom has been preoccupied with buying Laurel lessons and leasing her horses.... Which is ok, up to a point (and that point would be when Laurel is a bitch and gets away with it). That point would also be when mom gets pissed at me for not wanting to watch someone else go play with horses. She's spent 15 pounds on a lesson for me and it wasn't even a lesson, it was an assesment. She has spent hundreds of pounds and hours on Laurel, and that was all ok until I was an ungrateful child for not liking what I've got. So jackshit I do not have to be fucking happy with what I've got, which isn't much (no competing, no lessons, and occassionally excersizing someone else's pony in a manner which basically entails babysitting her kids while SHE excersizes the pony). I'm just pissed in general that I'm expected to be thrilled with what I've got and that this year I've basically given up something I'd hope to become really competitive with. I really feel, besides being cultured, I'm not gaining anything from this year. I feel like I've given up things that I really wanted to do later in life. Oh well. Life is still good, right? I feel like I'm trying to tell myself that more than anyone else. Oh well, everyone has bad days, weeks, and in this case what feels like a year....