She's So Heavy (I Want You)
.:DW:.
2. Just Waiting to Hear from You
.:DW:.
The Doctor pressed his hand tightly to his forehead to stave off his headache. The gesture did little to relieve the throbbing behind his eyes and through his forehead. He deserved far worse than a migraine. That punishment was reserved for his hearts.
He liked humans and humans, even cheeky journalists, liked their cliché metaphors. The Doctor had read human stories about how loss could break or leave holes in hearts. That could hardly be so because his broken hearts were much smaller than the hole the loss of Sarah left behind. Such emotions and analogies were unbefitting of a Time Lord, but he was finished with the title. Because being a Time Lord meant wanting to erase one Sarah Jane Smith from history for crimes not her own.
The guards hadn't caused much trouble. They had merely been Gallifreyan and hadn't cause any interference. The Doctor hadn't expected to be able to breach the mock trail even with the TARDIS' help. There were simply too many Time Lords present. But he had been surprised when he felt Sarah's timeline unraveling from some point ahead of him, beyond what his abilities allowed him to see. Her timeline hadn't been cut as in death, but was disappearing, undoing things which Sarah herself had not yet done.
The TARDIS again reminded him that only seconds had passed since he received the call. Though he hadn't used his skill in years, the Doctor had followed Sarah's timeline through Gallifrey until her interaction with another Time Lord was inevitable and blocked from his view. While he had experienced her mortality, Sarah was safe in her room, packing her things in a fit. But even her life couldn't expunge the experience of losing her -- to be merged with her timeline when it was being erased, to feel the better part of himself as if it would not exist.
Sarah could never go to Gallifrey. At least not until he had the pull and political power to keep her safe. As they were, neither he nor the TARDIS were strong enough to protect her, so they would both have to let her go. She would be safe on Earth living her life as she should.
Inexplicably, the Doctor couldn't remember why he had ever studied to be a Time Lord. Certainly he hadn't studied hard and realistically he knew he never would've met Sarah otherwise. But to think he had put any effort into becoming part of a group so pompous and self righteous that they would choose to erase an innocent from history made him ill. That they hadn't didn't excuse them from the fact that they would've. If her timeline had unraveled to their present the result would've been the same. Any less skill on the Doctor's part and Sarah would've been erased even while she was still within the TARDIS in the vortex.
Sarah would've ceased to exist because she had dared to follow her best friend to Gallifrey. She had not been accountable. The only ones responsible for the decision were the council which had dared to summon him. And he would follow their call because he had no choice in the matter.
The Doctor was reminded of another human cliché: he saw red.
.:.
At his first shout, Sarah dropped everything in her arms and ran. Her luggage didn't matter; she couldn't even remember what she had packed. The corridors seemed to slant downhill towards the secondary control room, quickening her pace.
Slightly out of breath, Sarah burst through the door not certain what to expect. Standing at the console, the Doctor was raging at the ceiling."-gits, ninnies, nitwits, imbeciles, ignoramuses-"
"Doctor."
"-twits, dunces, clods, botchers, dolts, dullards-"
"Oi, Doctor."
"- pilchards, stupid-heads, lamebrains-"
Sarah used both her hands to slam the door as hard as she could behind her. The Doctor jumped mid-rant, his cheeks slightly reddening. "Sarah." He glanced a few times between the closed door and Sarah. "You're still a good girl, Sarah."
He wasn't distracting her that easily. "You yelling a thesaurus in here?"
"What did you hear?"
As a journalist she was well versed with his ploy but granted him it anyway. "Well you started with idiot and ended with stupid-head, lamebrain. Seemed like you were running out of synonyms."
"Ah, well, that."
"Yes, that."
"Well, it would seem that I taxed the TARDIS' profanity filter and she ran out of clever things to say."
Of all the absurd things she had seen just that day, silicone life forms living in a dome included, running down the hallway to discover the Doctor cursed -- and his time machine didn't -- topped her list. Not only did he curse, he apparently cursed like a sailor. And perhaps always had. "And those other times?"
"Not all the other times. But you have to admit, the Time Lords rather are stupid-heads."
"You-" Sarah realized no matter what she said, she had no idea what he would hear: a Time Lord's gift indeed. Still, he must've learned English at some point. "prat."
The Doctor covered his mouth and gasped at her as if she had cursed in front of the Queen. "Sarah, I never."
"Don't think you'll get away with that." Shaking her finger at him never worked but she resorted to it. "Where are they sending us this time?"
"They aren't sending us anywhere." With that statement he was far too serious for the game. "They are calling me home. And I am taking you home."
Sarah knew several times over what it was like to have all the air sucked out of a room. His statement was worse than that. "You mean-"
He finished what she couldn't say. "Earth."
With that one word her previous outburst seemed childish and all together dangerous. But she wasn't the only one to have tantrums. "Why follow them this time? Last time you were going to sit on your bum and practice your double loops."
"Sarah, this isn't a social call. The Time Lords are arrogant, xenophobic fools. The same fools who pulled us from a transmat beam, dropped us on Skaro, and expected us to commit genocide on their word. We weren't sent to prevent a war from occurring or to negotiate a peace treaty before they began genetic testing or even to prevent Davros from gaining power. We were sent there to ethnically cleanse an entire race before they were born and given a day to do it. No time to consider moral choices when you are in a war zone."
Sarah didn't want to consider her own pressure for the Time Lords' plan. The choice had seemed much simpler after she had been threatened, forced into slave labor which would kill her, and tortured. It had been clear when she thought of the people she knew the Daleks would kill. But she hadn't held the wires in her hands.
I'm sorry, she wanted to say but he didn't let her.
He gripped both her shoulders. "I can't put you through that again. I won't."
"But yourself?"
His jaw twitched. All she wanted to hear was what he wouldn't say. All he said was what she never wanted to hear. "We've landed."
"Where?"
"Hillview Road." He pushed his coat off her shoulders. Reluctantly, Sarah let it drop. She turned the scanner on while he redressed.
He was correct for once. "That's my home."
"Of course. You probably thought I'd leave you in Aberdeen."
Even in life or death situations their banter still came easily. "You do have a history of landing in the wrong places."
"Your tiny human mind -- what is history to a Time Lord? And who is to say I was wrong? It's all a matter of perspective."
"Oh, no one I should think." Sarah forced herself to brighten. "Say, as you are a Time Lord, let me just pop in and get my things. I'll be out and in before you know it."
"Sarah, I must leave immediately. Alone."
"You're the one always promising we can be back five minutes before we leave." She couldn't quite keep the whine from her voice.
"That only works when we enter into another continuum. The Time Lords will always know the true amount of time which has passed."
"I see. Well, we've already wasted several minutes arguing about it so they can just wait a few more minutes. I keep an overnight bag packed and need to check my rent."
"Sarah," his voice was so soft she had to listen for it, "no."
And the most absurd thing about that day wasn't that the Doctor cursed, it was that he said no and entirely meant it. Or maybe it was that she suddenly wanted to leave so badly that she couldn't stand the thought of collecting her things which she dropped a lifetime ago. She pushed open the outside door. "Goodbye, Doctor."
"Oh, Sarah. I've been waiting for you inside your dusty living room for five minutes. Stop being such a rude host and say hello."
She gave him a half smile. "You aren't that good a driver."
He matched her smile. "Until next time."
Forcing herself to watch the TARDIS completely dematerialize, Sarah felt silly for not returning for her coat. Despite the chill, Sarah took even steps down her street. She checked the post, dug around for her spare key, and opened her door gently.
Her dusty living room was empty.
She searched everywhere anyway.
The first night she started her one anxiety-induced indulgence. Unable to sleep Sarah played Don't Pass Me By until she was worried she would wear a groove in her record. She played it every night after.
She told herself it was easier the second time. The Brigadier was lovely about having her around, though she refused to stand and reminisce. Instead, she kept moving to find her next story and she forgot how to stop. There were whispers about her, about the Doctor, but no one dared to say anything to her. None of their theories were correct anyway.
For the first few months she was absolutely certain that he would return one day. Sure, he might be dying and need to regenerate, but she could handle that. While she didn't like the idea of getting used to a new face, it was better than the alternative.
Five months in she had dinner with Harry before he left on a mission he couldn't discuss with her. She stopped visiting UNIT except when her investigations needed a little leveraging from the Brigadier.
Seven months in she threw her teakettle and accidentally hit her record player. Her record was scratched beyond repair and Sarah spent far too many nights trying to fall asleep in the silence.
Eight months in Sarah found and bought a new copy of The White Album. She paid far too much for it and thus resolved to be more careful with her records. Yet, she almost broke it in half when she walked through her door and into the panels of a blue police box.
"Sarah, I've been waiting for almost fifteen minutes. You do walk slow. Though I could've sworn your living room would've been dustier." He stood with his familiar teeth, curls, scarf, hat, and overcoat. He dared to stand there looking perfectly healthy as he went on about something, completely ignoring her. Which was perfectly fair, with the ringing in her ears Sarah completely ignored his rant.
"Sarah." The Doctor actually looked at her then stopped. "What happened to the-" He gestured his hands up and down her body, "pink and red? And your hair? I liked it before -- I always did like hairy women, but now you're not."
Sarah tucked a stray strand of her bobbed hair behind her ear and glanced down at her cobalt yellow with black accents trouser suit. The pants legs were long and flared so most people never noticed she was actually wearing combat boots. She spoke between her teeth. "Eight months."
"Come again?"
"Eight months. It's the twist of a dial and a blink of an eye in a time machine, but outside it's eight months."
"It can't have been eight months. Why I set-"
"No." Hearing how he had tried would make it worse. "You don't get to tell me what I did or didn't live. I tell you. It's been eight months of looking twice at anything blue and listening for wheezing-grinding noises. Eight months of writing pointless stories and paying the rent and thinking you were dead." She told herself she wouldn't cry.
"Oh, Sarah. It couldn't have been that bad."
Looking back, he was correct, of course. True, when she had helped UNIT stop an alien invasion in her third month home her article had been classified, but it had hardly been pointless. Her article on women in the British Military had been finalized by her publisher the previous week. And just that day she had decided to stop mourning the death of her best friend and listen to all the songs on The White Album. Her new copy was still in the bag she clutched tightly.
She had waited for him, but hadn't paused her life to wait. Because he had promised he'd be back and she knew that he would be late. And he did come back. He was back.
"Jelly baby?"
She had known before he pulled out the white wrapping that she would take one. To give herself time to think, she took three. "I didn't really want to cut it."
"Oh?"
She was the most self-conscious of her hair since she had changed styles. It was even shorter than when she first met the Doctor, back when he had been ruffles and a hawk-like nose. "I cut it as part of a story. But it's only hair, I remind myself it will grow out again."
"My Sarah, ever the pragmatist when you need to be." He brushed his thumb softly across her cheek, catching a stray tear.
I can't believe you even noticed, she doesn't say, because he did notice and she had thought he would never be around to notice. And those things were in her past. "I suppose I needed to be twice then." She had to force herself to step away from him so she could pull two sealed letters from her desk. "One for the rent and one for Aunt Lavinia."
When she had posted them, she found the Doctor fiddling with her record player and her copy of The White Album. "Sarah, a gift? You shouldn't have. You know I have every song in every release format for the whole of human history in the TARDIS."
"Good, then you won't mind putting it back where you found it." Because she would need it again, but not that day.
With her traveling case in hand, Sarah stepped through the doors and into the secondary control room. For the first time in eight months the air returned and she could breathe again.
The Doctor made a show of setting the controls, but Sarah didn't miss that he had only told the TARDIS to return to its last coordinates. "Are we going to Gallifrey?"
"No, no, no."
"Then why?" She pointed to the recall switch.
"Oh," he shrugged his shoulders sheepishly. "The best way to know that we aren't going to end up in a quarry is to have been there before."
Which was all very true but it wasn't the truth for which she had asked. Though he couldn't admit to it, Sarah was relieved he had forgotten her. Because if he could forget about her but still find her, then whatever changed between them hadn't shifted anything too fundamental. And though she could stand the thought of the Doctor regenerating, she wasn't prepared if he changed.
As the TARDIS had a destination, the journey across time and space was only long enough for Sarah to reacquaint herself with the familiar hum of the ship. She was out the door the moment they landed, knowing he would follow her momentarily.
The Doctor had been correct in that they didn't land in a quarry, but the planet wasn't much more inviting. The forest was all grays, muted yellows, and browns of twisted tree trunks and vines. The only other sparse vegetation growing from the sandy ground were tall grass and faded palm bushes. The trees were set far enough apart to move between, but broken logs and stones littered the terrain. Something slithered across a patch of sand in front of her and Sarah felt no inclination to explore without the Doctor.
"I have the strangest notion I've been here before."
"Of course you have. Otherwise the return mechanism wouldn't have brought us here."
He scowled at her logic. "I meant before that. Though I have no idea why I would have forgotten."
"Let's find something to remind you then."
The two fell into the easy rhythm of their later travels, following no particular path as they helped one another along. Emboldened by the lack of danger, Sarah continued on when the Doctor stopped and mumbled to himself. Sarah paused when she reached a withered log and turned to ensure she hadn't gotten too far out of the Doctor's range of sight. He was an indistinct brown blob to her, but she imagined he would be able to spot her yellow quite nicely. While she was contemplating the fortune of her shoe choice that morning, a body collided into her own and she was sent crashing forwards.
She hit the ground roughly, the air knocked from her lungs preventing her to call out, but she was more startled than injured. The weight shifted off of her and she was able to roll over. A brunette woman, perhaps a few years younger than herself, crouched above her, glancing between Sarah and her surroundings. She was dressed entirely in brown skins of some sort, with a brown and tan choker at her neck. From her dress and demeanor, Sarah assumed she was some sort of tribal warrior.
"Hello." Sarah brought her hands up slowly. "My name is Sarah Jane Smith, but you can call me Sarah. What's yours?"
The woman cocked her head to the side. "You do not look like a Tesh; you do not have two heads. But there are no others in the Beyond."
It wasn't the oddest greeting she'd received, though Sarah needed to put her interest the two headed Tesh aside. "No, I'm not a Tesh. I'm a traveler."
"A traveler? But there is only the village, the mountains, and the Wall."
"My home is further than the mountains." The statement was true enough, her planet and time was well past any mountains. "Beyond what?" Sarah realized she might've changed topics too quickly. "What I mean is, if we're in the Beyond, we have to be beyond something, right?"
"We're beyond the barrier which keeps the monsters from the village."
"Oh," putting together that they were outside the barrier and thus with the monsters, Sarah fought back the sudden dread from knowing they would soon find one.
"You travel alone and unarmed beyond the barrier? You are brave or a fool."
"Far more of the latter, I think." Not that she minded. She had tried the sensible route but it was nothing like the path through the stars.
The woman's featured softened a bit. "I see," she said in a manner reserved for indulging small children. Sarah imagined the tone was unusual for her. "I'm am called Leela." Leela straightened and offered Sarah her hand. With her assistance, Sarah stood and dusted herself off.
"Why are you in the Beyond?"
"I am banished from the tribe of Sevateem for speaking against the false god Xoanon and the suicide raid which was said would free him."
Before Sarah could ask her next question, Leela had pulled her knife at some small sound. Sarah was surprised when the warrior took a step back, gasping in terror between parted lips. The gesture somehow made her look much younger. Sarah turned to see the Doctor standing there with his hands in the air much as she had done before.
"Hello there." The Doctor greeted everyone new with the same light voice no matter his peril.
"The Evil One." Leela pushed Sarah behind her and forced them both to take another step back when the Doctor took one forwards.
"Are you all right, Sarah?" Sarah was planning how to defuse the situation when Leela whirled behind her and pressed the knife to her neck.
"You are friends with the Evil One. From where else could you have come? How else could you walk among the creatures with no fear?"
Gripping the deceptively strong arm, Sarah attempted to loosen the hold. "Leela, listen to me. He's my friend but he's not the Evil One. His name is the Doctor."
"The friends of the Evil One would hardly call him thus."
"She has a point, you know." The Doctor shrugged unhelpfully. "Except for this one fellow I met in-"
"Quiet."
Though Leela had interrupted him, Sarah found the Doctor's ability to ramble soothing. It wasn't the first time she had been used as a hostage against him, still no less frightening, but she recognized his ability to talk until he had a plan. "Why don't we all discuss this-" The knife blade pressed into her throat.
"You will call off your phantoms if you wish for your friend to live."
The Doctor's eyes widened. "Phantoms you say?"
"Yes, I cannot see your pets, but I know they are here."
"They aren't mine, but if they are invisible we just might have a chance." He dug an egg timer out of his pocket.
"Do not follow us." Leela began walking both herself and Sarah backwards the way she had come.
Trying to assure the Doctor with a smile, Sarah moved as carefully as she could backwards with a knife at her throat. He called after them. "Try to avoid making any noise. The phantoms will be attracted to the vibrations."
When they were out sight of the Doctor, Leela gripped her arm tightly and began to pull her through the forest. Sarah nearly tripped and the commotion immediately brought them to the attention of a creature. Dropping Sarah's wrist, Leela froze. A circle of sand seemed to cave in under an invisible force: footsteps of a ten foot monster. Sarah had to push Leela's shoulder twice before they both started running. When it was merely two steps behind them the monster stopped and turned back.
Leela stared down at the footprint. "The Evil One has called it back to save you."
"No, the Doctor said the phantoms were attracted to vibrations. He just gave it a bigger target." She hoped it wasn't himself. She gestured at the space between them. "Your first instinct wasn't to kill me or threaten me when it chased us. We were running together." She almost mentioned that Leela hadn't run at all but decided against it.
The observation seemed to upset Leela as she grabbed Sarah's wrist again. "I could have still killed you at that distance. Come, we will move quietly, but remember I will not hesitate a second time."
To avoid meeting other creatures, Sarah agreed and continued in silence. Though she couldn't see anything, she felt a strange tingling as if passing through a static field and Leela began to relax.
"We are across the Boundary, the creatures will not follow."
"What will you do with me?"
"You know of our raid tomorrow, I cannot let you return and warn the Tesh. But you are friends with the Evil One. We can establish a trade, you for Xoanon. Then no one has to die in the attack on the Wall."
"Which is a noble goal, but I'm not friends with the Evil One. And you said Xoanon was a false god."
Leela narrowed her eyes. "God or not, my people die for Xoanon. If he does not exist, then at least the Sevateem will believe he is free and no longer die in his name. We will see about a trade."
Her plan was sensible, if only her assumptions were true then it might've worked. "Why did you think my friend was the Evil One?"
Pausing, Leela turned to study her again. She turned again without comment and ignored Sarah's other attempts for discussion. Sarah weighed the possibility of escaping, but she didn't doubt Leela's ability to kill her at a distance. Once they reached the village and attempted to negotiate with the Evil One, Sarah was certain she would no longer be a useful hostage for trade. Then she could then talk her way back to the Doctor and the TARDIS.
At the edge of the forest, they reached a plateau over a valley. Leela pointed across towards the mountain. "You wondered how I knew the face of the Evil One. All of the Sevateem have known it for generations."
Carved into the side of the mountain was a familiar face, that of her second Doctor. Sarah remembered the Doctor thinking he had been here before, but she assumed it was a previous regeneration. That it wasn't was absurd because she had been with him since his regeneration except for his trip to Gallifrey. The only other time he hadn't been with Sarah was when he was under the care of Harry. But Sarah knew even as unbalanced as he had been, the Doctor could've slipped past UNIT.
"Oh, Doctor. What have you done?"
Sarah was too distracted to notice the rest of the journey before a man stopped them.
"Tomas." Leela seemed genuinely pleased though she looked warily around her.
"Leela." He had no such concerns as he stepped towards her and touched her shoulder. "Neeva sent me. As soon as you crossed the barrier Xoanon contacted him. I'm to escort you and the girl back to village."
Sarah wanted to protest over being the girl but neither was paying her any mind.
"Neeva? But he is the one who had be branded a blasphemer and sent into the Beyond. You said he sent the assassins after me into the forest."
"She must be the key to his grace. Who is she?"
Leela cut off several of her objections as Tomas stared at Sarah. "She is Sarah, a friend of the Evil One."
"She is nothing like the legends."
"I do not think the legends speak of her." She addressed Sarah. "How did you befriend the Evil One? Did he kidnap you and bend your will?"
"First, he's not the Evil One." Despite the image in the mountain, Sarah was determined to convince everyone he wasn't. "The Doctor values all lives, even those who hate him. And second, if anything, I insinuated myself on him when I stole away on his ship."
Frustratingly, Leela ignored her explanation and turned back to Tomas. "We will see what Neeva wants."
Sarah instantly disliked Neeva. He was a bald man with a neatly trimmed beard who had some rank as a type of religious leader for the tribe. But his undisguised fascination with her made Sarah uneasy. He stood before Andor, the tribe's seasoned warrior and leader, whom sat on a futuristic, metal captain's chair in a hut of wood and clay. Neeva and Andor had been discussing her fate for a time after hearing Leela's account.
"Neeva, you promised us victory at the next raid. But now you proclaim Xoanon has arranged a hostage exchange. Why should we follow your new plan if we have been assured victory?"
Sarah was still shocked that Neeva reported the Evil One was interested in her return. Hearing it repeatedly hadn't made it any more believable.
"I did not know of Xoanon's true plan until Leela and the girl returned through the Barrier." Sarah saw no humility in Neeva's posture even as he admitted his deficiency. "The suggested raid was part of Xoanon's plan for Leela to find the Evil One beyond the boundary and return with his captured friend."
Sarah was silenced and Leela was restrained before either could counter his statement.
Calib, who Leela had warned of as power hungry and cunning, spoke, "I do not trust Leela to make the exchange at the Wall. A raid should accompany them through."
Neeva grimaced. "That is not the deal. Only Leela and the girl are to enter."
Andor silenced them both. "I will take your statements under advisement."
Sarah spent the night under the watch of two guards wishing she had paid more attention to the Doctor's lessons from Houdini.
Leela woke her in the morning, bringing Sarah an outfit of animal skins. The warrior spoke loudly of how to dress, keeping the male guards from her true conversation. "I attempted to come for you last night, but they placed two guards on each of us."
"So you no longer believe the Doctor is the Evil One?"
"No, you are too kind for such a friend." Sarah decided not to poke holes in her logic. "The Doctor did warn us of the vibrations attracting the phantoms and when one attacked, you brought me with you as you ran from it instead of towards it. And you seemed genuinely surprised when you saw the mountain and when Neeva declared there would be a trade."
"What do we do?"
"The clothes are so you do not make yourself an unnecessary target. We are being escorted as far as the Wall with the raid. If there is an opportunity to flee we must take it."
Sarah nodded and resisted tugging at her attire. She told herself she had far more important things to worry about than her legs.
The journey to the Wall presented no opportunities. Sarah thought she caught sight of the Doctor's scarf twice, but had to convince herself it was a trick of her eyes when there was no other sign of him.
The Wall appeared to be black and amorphous. Neeva pointed to a shimmering tunnel. "See, it is as Xoanon promised. Leela and the girl will enter and he will be freed."
Leela's hand went to her hip and Sarah knew that the warrior planned to fight to the death. While she and Tomas might kill some of the raid as well, neither had any real chance of surviving. Sarah placed a steadying hand on Leela's.
"If we go through the tunnel we can find another way through the Wall and back to the Doctor."
"There is no other way through the Wall."
"There has to be another." Because Sarah wouldn't allow any other option.
Reluctantly, the two women walked through the tunnel. Calib raised a shout and the rest of the raid moved towards the tunnel behind them. Before the men could reach the Wall, bright spotlights caught each warrior where they stood. They screamed as they fell to the ground.
"Tomas." Leela turned back with panic in her voice, but the tunnel had closed. "Tomas." She pounded against the Wall but it wouldn't give.
Sarah let out her own gasp at the figure which approached. He wore what appeared to be some sort of space suit with a bright red coil going from the helmet down its back. Two heads, Sarah remembered Leela saying, and with the helmet Sarah finally understood.
Growling when she saw it, Leela pulled her knife. "Tesh." She moved forward but faltered and slowly fell at the Tesh's feet. The Tesh hadn't moved.
"Leela." Dropping to her knees, Sarah attempted to rouse her. "What did you do to her?" She meant to turn on the Tesh herself, but felt her muscles lock and she fell unconscious across Leela.
Sarah awoke miserably on a hard metal floor. She could tell she was in a control room of sorts, but the equipment was covered in pieces of cloth. Candles were on nearly every flat surface. Wires were pulled from the computers and tangled along the walls and ceiling much like the vines in the forest.
A man stood in front of her. He wore a gray uniform with white and red stripes, puffy sleeves, a flat-topped helmet, and green shoes. He smiled at her, but only his lips moved as if the rest of his features on his ashen face were frozen. "I am Jabel, Captain of the People of Tesh. You are Sarah. We have been waiting for you."
Sarah stood and tried to keep the quiver from her voice. "I know perfectly well whom I am. Where is Leela?" She hoped it sounded like a demand.
"Ah, the Savage. The others are tending to her."
Sarah's stomach tightened. "She is not a Savage. And I know what sort of tending your type does. Release us."
"I cannot. Xoanon has commanded it so."
"Xoanon? But he's the Sevateem's god." Sarah realized she had said something wrong when Jabel's face darkened.
"You will not speak so. Xoanon is around us. He is responsible for operating everything you see. He is with us in these wall, not with the Savages."
"He runs everything? Like a computer?" Sarah gasped -- a computer as xenophobic and arrogant as those Time Lord on Gallifrey. "He's been playing both sides, using you."
"Blasphemer. I know not what Xoanon wants with you, but you will not leave him this time."
"This time? But I've never met him before."
"You left him when he was just born. You told him he couldn't leave, but then left yourself. He's been waiting for your return."
The account was a sick parody of her plea at UNIT. The computer appeared to have some twisted form of the Doctor's memories from when he first regenerated. It would've seemed to the computer that she had left him after she had made the Doctor stay with her to assist UNIT. Xoanon was a computer with the Doctor's confused mind, all alone except for the two tribes he had been manipulating for generations.
The Doctor never did well when he was by himself. She wasn't sure she could talk her way into his graces when it was clear that the computer had gone quite mad. Xoanon must've sensed her presence when she walked through the barrier and fixated on her in a perversion of her friendship with the Doctor.
Under Jabel's orders, two other Tesh approached her. "Take her to the Sacred Chamber. Ensure she cannot leave even if you have to break her legs."
In her panic, she struggled against the guards, calling vainly for the Doctor, but she felt her body lock against her again as she was dragged from the room.
.:DW:.
2011/04/17
Chapter 3
Notes: I designed this story backwards and in my ambition, didn't even notice I was using the All Just a Dream trope. I don't particularly like this trope myself. When I decided to go ahead with my plan, I tried not to fall into all the pitfalls the trope brings, though I'm sure there are some I do. But my original design for the first chapter was much shorter and less engaging, so it would be less jarring for someone when I brought in the second timeline. I can promise this doesn't dissolve into Or Was It Just a Dream and also that I'm not going to forgo dark_fest and have the happy ending that All Just a Dream can sometime bring.
I like the story from my first chapter. I like this story too. I want to know how they both end. Sadly this is not that story, but those stories could come in the future.
2. Just Waiting to Hear from You
.:DW:.
The Doctor pressed his hand tightly to his forehead to stave off his headache. The gesture did little to relieve the throbbing behind his eyes and through his forehead. He deserved far worse than a migraine. That punishment was reserved for his hearts.
He liked humans and humans, even cheeky journalists, liked their cliché metaphors. The Doctor had read human stories about how loss could break or leave holes in hearts. That could hardly be so because his broken hearts were much smaller than the hole the loss of Sarah left behind. Such emotions and analogies were unbefitting of a Time Lord, but he was finished with the title. Because being a Time Lord meant wanting to erase one Sarah Jane Smith from history for crimes not her own.
The guards hadn't caused much trouble. They had merely been Gallifreyan and hadn't cause any interference. The Doctor hadn't expected to be able to breach the mock trail even with the TARDIS' help. There were simply too many Time Lords present. But he had been surprised when he felt Sarah's timeline unraveling from some point ahead of him, beyond what his abilities allowed him to see. Her timeline hadn't been cut as in death, but was disappearing, undoing things which Sarah herself had not yet done.
The TARDIS again reminded him that only seconds had passed since he received the call. Though he hadn't used his skill in years, the Doctor had followed Sarah's timeline through Gallifrey until her interaction with another Time Lord was inevitable and blocked from his view. While he had experienced her mortality, Sarah was safe in her room, packing her things in a fit. But even her life couldn't expunge the experience of losing her -- to be merged with her timeline when it was being erased, to feel the better part of himself as if it would not exist.
Sarah could never go to Gallifrey. At least not until he had the pull and political power to keep her safe. As they were, neither he nor the TARDIS were strong enough to protect her, so they would both have to let her go. She would be safe on Earth living her life as she should.
Inexplicably, the Doctor couldn't remember why he had ever studied to be a Time Lord. Certainly he hadn't studied hard and realistically he knew he never would've met Sarah otherwise. But to think he had put any effort into becoming part of a group so pompous and self righteous that they would choose to erase an innocent from history made him ill. That they hadn't didn't excuse them from the fact that they would've. If her timeline had unraveled to their present the result would've been the same. Any less skill on the Doctor's part and Sarah would've been erased even while she was still within the TARDIS in the vortex.
Sarah would've ceased to exist because she had dared to follow her best friend to Gallifrey. She had not been accountable. The only ones responsible for the decision were the council which had dared to summon him. And he would follow their call because he had no choice in the matter.
The Doctor was reminded of another human cliché: he saw red.
.:.
At his first shout, Sarah dropped everything in her arms and ran. Her luggage didn't matter; she couldn't even remember what she had packed. The corridors seemed to slant downhill towards the secondary control room, quickening her pace.
Slightly out of breath, Sarah burst through the door not certain what to expect. Standing at the console, the Doctor was raging at the ceiling."-gits, ninnies, nitwits, imbeciles, ignoramuses-"
"Doctor."
"-twits, dunces, clods, botchers, dolts, dullards-"
"Oi, Doctor."
"- pilchards, stupid-heads, lamebrains-"
Sarah used both her hands to slam the door as hard as she could behind her. The Doctor jumped mid-rant, his cheeks slightly reddening. "Sarah." He glanced a few times between the closed door and Sarah. "You're still a good girl, Sarah."
He wasn't distracting her that easily. "You yelling a thesaurus in here?"
"What did you hear?"
As a journalist she was well versed with his ploy but granted him it anyway. "Well you started with idiot and ended with stupid-head, lamebrain. Seemed like you were running out of synonyms."
"Ah, well, that."
"Yes, that."
"Well, it would seem that I taxed the TARDIS' profanity filter and she ran out of clever things to say."
Of all the absurd things she had seen just that day, silicone life forms living in a dome included, running down the hallway to discover the Doctor cursed -- and his time machine didn't -- topped her list. Not only did he curse, he apparently cursed like a sailor. And perhaps always had. "And those other times?"
"Not all the other times. But you have to admit, the Time Lords rather are stupid-heads."
"You-" Sarah realized no matter what she said, she had no idea what he would hear: a Time Lord's gift indeed. Still, he must've learned English at some point. "prat."
The Doctor covered his mouth and gasped at her as if she had cursed in front of the Queen. "Sarah, I never."
"Don't think you'll get away with that." Shaking her finger at him never worked but she resorted to it. "Where are they sending us this time?"
"They aren't sending us anywhere." With that statement he was far too serious for the game. "They are calling me home. And I am taking you home."
Sarah knew several times over what it was like to have all the air sucked out of a room. His statement was worse than that. "You mean-"
He finished what she couldn't say. "Earth."
With that one word her previous outburst seemed childish and all together dangerous. But she wasn't the only one to have tantrums. "Why follow them this time? Last time you were going to sit on your bum and practice your double loops."
"Sarah, this isn't a social call. The Time Lords are arrogant, xenophobic fools. The same fools who pulled us from a transmat beam, dropped us on Skaro, and expected us to commit genocide on their word. We weren't sent to prevent a war from occurring or to negotiate a peace treaty before they began genetic testing or even to prevent Davros from gaining power. We were sent there to ethnically cleanse an entire race before they were born and given a day to do it. No time to consider moral choices when you are in a war zone."
Sarah didn't want to consider her own pressure for the Time Lords' plan. The choice had seemed much simpler after she had been threatened, forced into slave labor which would kill her, and tortured. It had been clear when she thought of the people she knew the Daleks would kill. But she hadn't held the wires in her hands.
I'm sorry, she wanted to say but he didn't let her.
He gripped both her shoulders. "I can't put you through that again. I won't."
"But yourself?"
His jaw twitched. All she wanted to hear was what he wouldn't say. All he said was what she never wanted to hear. "We've landed."
"Where?"
"Hillview Road." He pushed his coat off her shoulders. Reluctantly, Sarah let it drop. She turned the scanner on while he redressed.
He was correct for once. "That's my home."
"Of course. You probably thought I'd leave you in Aberdeen."
Even in life or death situations their banter still came easily. "You do have a history of landing in the wrong places."
"Your tiny human mind -- what is history to a Time Lord? And who is to say I was wrong? It's all a matter of perspective."
"Oh, no one I should think." Sarah forced herself to brighten. "Say, as you are a Time Lord, let me just pop in and get my things. I'll be out and in before you know it."
"Sarah, I must leave immediately. Alone."
"You're the one always promising we can be back five minutes before we leave." She couldn't quite keep the whine from her voice.
"That only works when we enter into another continuum. The Time Lords will always know the true amount of time which has passed."
"I see. Well, we've already wasted several minutes arguing about it so they can just wait a few more minutes. I keep an overnight bag packed and need to check my rent."
"Sarah," his voice was so soft she had to listen for it, "no."
And the most absurd thing about that day wasn't that the Doctor cursed, it was that he said no and entirely meant it. Or maybe it was that she suddenly wanted to leave so badly that she couldn't stand the thought of collecting her things which she dropped a lifetime ago. She pushed open the outside door. "Goodbye, Doctor."
"Oh, Sarah. I've been waiting for you inside your dusty living room for five minutes. Stop being such a rude host and say hello."
She gave him a half smile. "You aren't that good a driver."
He matched her smile. "Until next time."
Forcing herself to watch the TARDIS completely dematerialize, Sarah felt silly for not returning for her coat. Despite the chill, Sarah took even steps down her street. She checked the post, dug around for her spare key, and opened her door gently.
Her dusty living room was empty.
She searched everywhere anyway.
The first night she started her one anxiety-induced indulgence. Unable to sleep Sarah played Don't Pass Me By until she was worried she would wear a groove in her record. She played it every night after.
She told herself it was easier the second time. The Brigadier was lovely about having her around, though she refused to stand and reminisce. Instead, she kept moving to find her next story and she forgot how to stop. There were whispers about her, about the Doctor, but no one dared to say anything to her. None of their theories were correct anyway.
For the first few months she was absolutely certain that he would return one day. Sure, he might be dying and need to regenerate, but she could handle that. While she didn't like the idea of getting used to a new face, it was better than the alternative.
Five months in she had dinner with Harry before he left on a mission he couldn't discuss with her. She stopped visiting UNIT except when her investigations needed a little leveraging from the Brigadier.
Seven months in she threw her teakettle and accidentally hit her record player. Her record was scratched beyond repair and Sarah spent far too many nights trying to fall asleep in the silence.
Eight months in Sarah found and bought a new copy of The White Album. She paid far too much for it and thus resolved to be more careful with her records. Yet, she almost broke it in half when she walked through her door and into the panels of a blue police box.
"Sarah, I've been waiting for almost fifteen minutes. You do walk slow. Though I could've sworn your living room would've been dustier." He stood with his familiar teeth, curls, scarf, hat, and overcoat. He dared to stand there looking perfectly healthy as he went on about something, completely ignoring her. Which was perfectly fair, with the ringing in her ears Sarah completely ignored his rant.
"Sarah." The Doctor actually looked at her then stopped. "What happened to the-" He gestured his hands up and down her body, "pink and red? And your hair? I liked it before -- I always did like hairy women, but now you're not."
Sarah tucked a stray strand of her bobbed hair behind her ear and glanced down at her cobalt yellow with black accents trouser suit. The pants legs were long and flared so most people never noticed she was actually wearing combat boots. She spoke between her teeth. "Eight months."
"Come again?"
"Eight months. It's the twist of a dial and a blink of an eye in a time machine, but outside it's eight months."
"It can't have been eight months. Why I set-"
"No." Hearing how he had tried would make it worse. "You don't get to tell me what I did or didn't live. I tell you. It's been eight months of looking twice at anything blue and listening for wheezing-grinding noises. Eight months of writing pointless stories and paying the rent and thinking you were dead." She told herself she wouldn't cry.
"Oh, Sarah. It couldn't have been that bad."
Looking back, he was correct, of course. True, when she had helped UNIT stop an alien invasion in her third month home her article had been classified, but it had hardly been pointless. Her article on women in the British Military had been finalized by her publisher the previous week. And just that day she had decided to stop mourning the death of her best friend and listen to all the songs on The White Album. Her new copy was still in the bag she clutched tightly.
She had waited for him, but hadn't paused her life to wait. Because he had promised he'd be back and she knew that he would be late. And he did come back. He was back.
"Jelly baby?"
She had known before he pulled out the white wrapping that she would take one. To give herself time to think, she took three. "I didn't really want to cut it."
"Oh?"
She was the most self-conscious of her hair since she had changed styles. It was even shorter than when she first met the Doctor, back when he had been ruffles and a hawk-like nose. "I cut it as part of a story. But it's only hair, I remind myself it will grow out again."
"My Sarah, ever the pragmatist when you need to be." He brushed his thumb softly across her cheek, catching a stray tear.
I can't believe you even noticed, she doesn't say, because he did notice and she had thought he would never be around to notice. And those things were in her past. "I suppose I needed to be twice then." She had to force herself to step away from him so she could pull two sealed letters from her desk. "One for the rent and one for Aunt Lavinia."
When she had posted them, she found the Doctor fiddling with her record player and her copy of The White Album. "Sarah, a gift? You shouldn't have. You know I have every song in every release format for the whole of human history in the TARDIS."
"Good, then you won't mind putting it back where you found it." Because she would need it again, but not that day.
With her traveling case in hand, Sarah stepped through the doors and into the secondary control room. For the first time in eight months the air returned and she could breathe again.
The Doctor made a show of setting the controls, but Sarah didn't miss that he had only told the TARDIS to return to its last coordinates. "Are we going to Gallifrey?"
"No, no, no."
"Then why?" She pointed to the recall switch.
"Oh," he shrugged his shoulders sheepishly. "The best way to know that we aren't going to end up in a quarry is to have been there before."
Which was all very true but it wasn't the truth for which she had asked. Though he couldn't admit to it, Sarah was relieved he had forgotten her. Because if he could forget about her but still find her, then whatever changed between them hadn't shifted anything too fundamental. And though she could stand the thought of the Doctor regenerating, she wasn't prepared if he changed.
As the TARDIS had a destination, the journey across time and space was only long enough for Sarah to reacquaint herself with the familiar hum of the ship. She was out the door the moment they landed, knowing he would follow her momentarily.
The Doctor had been correct in that they didn't land in a quarry, but the planet wasn't much more inviting. The forest was all grays, muted yellows, and browns of twisted tree trunks and vines. The only other sparse vegetation growing from the sandy ground were tall grass and faded palm bushes. The trees were set far enough apart to move between, but broken logs and stones littered the terrain. Something slithered across a patch of sand in front of her and Sarah felt no inclination to explore without the Doctor.
"I have the strangest notion I've been here before."
"Of course you have. Otherwise the return mechanism wouldn't have brought us here."
He scowled at her logic. "I meant before that. Though I have no idea why I would have forgotten."
"Let's find something to remind you then."
The two fell into the easy rhythm of their later travels, following no particular path as they helped one another along. Emboldened by the lack of danger, Sarah continued on when the Doctor stopped and mumbled to himself. Sarah paused when she reached a withered log and turned to ensure she hadn't gotten too far out of the Doctor's range of sight. He was an indistinct brown blob to her, but she imagined he would be able to spot her yellow quite nicely. While she was contemplating the fortune of her shoe choice that morning, a body collided into her own and she was sent crashing forwards.
She hit the ground roughly, the air knocked from her lungs preventing her to call out, but she was more startled than injured. The weight shifted off of her and she was able to roll over. A brunette woman, perhaps a few years younger than herself, crouched above her, glancing between Sarah and her surroundings. She was dressed entirely in brown skins of some sort, with a brown and tan choker at her neck. From her dress and demeanor, Sarah assumed she was some sort of tribal warrior.
"Hello." Sarah brought her hands up slowly. "My name is Sarah Jane Smith, but you can call me Sarah. What's yours?"
The woman cocked her head to the side. "You do not look like a Tesh; you do not have two heads. But there are no others in the Beyond."
It wasn't the oddest greeting she'd received, though Sarah needed to put her interest the two headed Tesh aside. "No, I'm not a Tesh. I'm a traveler."
"A traveler? But there is only the village, the mountains, and the Wall."
"My home is further than the mountains." The statement was true enough, her planet and time was well past any mountains. "Beyond what?" Sarah realized she might've changed topics too quickly. "What I mean is, if we're in the Beyond, we have to be beyond something, right?"
"We're beyond the barrier which keeps the monsters from the village."
"Oh," putting together that they were outside the barrier and thus with the monsters, Sarah fought back the sudden dread from knowing they would soon find one.
"You travel alone and unarmed beyond the barrier? You are brave or a fool."
"Far more of the latter, I think." Not that she minded. She had tried the sensible route but it was nothing like the path through the stars.
The woman's featured softened a bit. "I see," she said in a manner reserved for indulging small children. Sarah imagined the tone was unusual for her. "I'm am called Leela." Leela straightened and offered Sarah her hand. With her assistance, Sarah stood and dusted herself off.
"Why are you in the Beyond?"
"I am banished from the tribe of Sevateem for speaking against the false god Xoanon and the suicide raid which was said would free him."
Before Sarah could ask her next question, Leela had pulled her knife at some small sound. Sarah was surprised when the warrior took a step back, gasping in terror between parted lips. The gesture somehow made her look much younger. Sarah turned to see the Doctor standing there with his hands in the air much as she had done before.
"Hello there." The Doctor greeted everyone new with the same light voice no matter his peril.
"The Evil One." Leela pushed Sarah behind her and forced them both to take another step back when the Doctor took one forwards.
"Are you all right, Sarah?" Sarah was planning how to defuse the situation when Leela whirled behind her and pressed the knife to her neck.
"You are friends with the Evil One. From where else could you have come? How else could you walk among the creatures with no fear?"
Gripping the deceptively strong arm, Sarah attempted to loosen the hold. "Leela, listen to me. He's my friend but he's not the Evil One. His name is the Doctor."
"The friends of the Evil One would hardly call him thus."
"She has a point, you know." The Doctor shrugged unhelpfully. "Except for this one fellow I met in-"
"Quiet."
Though Leela had interrupted him, Sarah found the Doctor's ability to ramble soothing. It wasn't the first time she had been used as a hostage against him, still no less frightening, but she recognized his ability to talk until he had a plan. "Why don't we all discuss this-" The knife blade pressed into her throat.
"You will call off your phantoms if you wish for your friend to live."
The Doctor's eyes widened. "Phantoms you say?"
"Yes, I cannot see your pets, but I know they are here."
"They aren't mine, but if they are invisible we just might have a chance." He dug an egg timer out of his pocket.
"Do not follow us." Leela began walking both herself and Sarah backwards the way she had come.
Trying to assure the Doctor with a smile, Sarah moved as carefully as she could backwards with a knife at her throat. He called after them. "Try to avoid making any noise. The phantoms will be attracted to the vibrations."
When they were out sight of the Doctor, Leela gripped her arm tightly and began to pull her through the forest. Sarah nearly tripped and the commotion immediately brought them to the attention of a creature. Dropping Sarah's wrist, Leela froze. A circle of sand seemed to cave in under an invisible force: footsteps of a ten foot monster. Sarah had to push Leela's shoulder twice before they both started running. When it was merely two steps behind them the monster stopped and turned back.
Leela stared down at the footprint. "The Evil One has called it back to save you."
"No, the Doctor said the phantoms were attracted to vibrations. He just gave it a bigger target." She hoped it wasn't himself. She gestured at the space between them. "Your first instinct wasn't to kill me or threaten me when it chased us. We were running together." She almost mentioned that Leela hadn't run at all but decided against it.
The observation seemed to upset Leela as she grabbed Sarah's wrist again. "I could have still killed you at that distance. Come, we will move quietly, but remember I will not hesitate a second time."
To avoid meeting other creatures, Sarah agreed and continued in silence. Though she couldn't see anything, she felt a strange tingling as if passing through a static field and Leela began to relax.
"We are across the Boundary, the creatures will not follow."
"What will you do with me?"
"You know of our raid tomorrow, I cannot let you return and warn the Tesh. But you are friends with the Evil One. We can establish a trade, you for Xoanon. Then no one has to die in the attack on the Wall."
"Which is a noble goal, but I'm not friends with the Evil One. And you said Xoanon was a false god."
Leela narrowed her eyes. "God or not, my people die for Xoanon. If he does not exist, then at least the Sevateem will believe he is free and no longer die in his name. We will see about a trade."
Her plan was sensible, if only her assumptions were true then it might've worked. "Why did you think my friend was the Evil One?"
Pausing, Leela turned to study her again. She turned again without comment and ignored Sarah's other attempts for discussion. Sarah weighed the possibility of escaping, but she didn't doubt Leela's ability to kill her at a distance. Once they reached the village and attempted to negotiate with the Evil One, Sarah was certain she would no longer be a useful hostage for trade. Then she could then talk her way back to the Doctor and the TARDIS.
At the edge of the forest, they reached a plateau over a valley. Leela pointed across towards the mountain. "You wondered how I knew the face of the Evil One. All of the Sevateem have known it for generations."
Carved into the side of the mountain was a familiar face, that of her second Doctor. Sarah remembered the Doctor thinking he had been here before, but she assumed it was a previous regeneration. That it wasn't was absurd because she had been with him since his regeneration except for his trip to Gallifrey. The only other time he hadn't been with Sarah was when he was under the care of Harry. But Sarah knew even as unbalanced as he had been, the Doctor could've slipped past UNIT.
"Oh, Doctor. What have you done?"
Sarah was too distracted to notice the rest of the journey before a man stopped them.
"Tomas." Leela seemed genuinely pleased though she looked warily around her.
"Leela." He had no such concerns as he stepped towards her and touched her shoulder. "Neeva sent me. As soon as you crossed the barrier Xoanon contacted him. I'm to escort you and the girl back to village."
Sarah wanted to protest over being the girl but neither was paying her any mind.
"Neeva? But he is the one who had be branded a blasphemer and sent into the Beyond. You said he sent the assassins after me into the forest."
"She must be the key to his grace. Who is she?"
Leela cut off several of her objections as Tomas stared at Sarah. "She is Sarah, a friend of the Evil One."
"She is nothing like the legends."
"I do not think the legends speak of her." She addressed Sarah. "How did you befriend the Evil One? Did he kidnap you and bend your will?"
"First, he's not the Evil One." Despite the image in the mountain, Sarah was determined to convince everyone he wasn't. "The Doctor values all lives, even those who hate him. And second, if anything, I insinuated myself on him when I stole away on his ship."
Frustratingly, Leela ignored her explanation and turned back to Tomas. "We will see what Neeva wants."
Sarah instantly disliked Neeva. He was a bald man with a neatly trimmed beard who had some rank as a type of religious leader for the tribe. But his undisguised fascination with her made Sarah uneasy. He stood before Andor, the tribe's seasoned warrior and leader, whom sat on a futuristic, metal captain's chair in a hut of wood and clay. Neeva and Andor had been discussing her fate for a time after hearing Leela's account.
"Neeva, you promised us victory at the next raid. But now you proclaim Xoanon has arranged a hostage exchange. Why should we follow your new plan if we have been assured victory?"
Sarah was still shocked that Neeva reported the Evil One was interested in her return. Hearing it repeatedly hadn't made it any more believable.
"I did not know of Xoanon's true plan until Leela and the girl returned through the Barrier." Sarah saw no humility in Neeva's posture even as he admitted his deficiency. "The suggested raid was part of Xoanon's plan for Leela to find the Evil One beyond the boundary and return with his captured friend."
Sarah was silenced and Leela was restrained before either could counter his statement.
Calib, who Leela had warned of as power hungry and cunning, spoke, "I do not trust Leela to make the exchange at the Wall. A raid should accompany them through."
Neeva grimaced. "That is not the deal. Only Leela and the girl are to enter."
Andor silenced them both. "I will take your statements under advisement."
Sarah spent the night under the watch of two guards wishing she had paid more attention to the Doctor's lessons from Houdini.
Leela woke her in the morning, bringing Sarah an outfit of animal skins. The warrior spoke loudly of how to dress, keeping the male guards from her true conversation. "I attempted to come for you last night, but they placed two guards on each of us."
"So you no longer believe the Doctor is the Evil One?"
"No, you are too kind for such a friend." Sarah decided not to poke holes in her logic. "The Doctor did warn us of the vibrations attracting the phantoms and when one attacked, you brought me with you as you ran from it instead of towards it. And you seemed genuinely surprised when you saw the mountain and when Neeva declared there would be a trade."
"What do we do?"
"The clothes are so you do not make yourself an unnecessary target. We are being escorted as far as the Wall with the raid. If there is an opportunity to flee we must take it."
Sarah nodded and resisted tugging at her attire. She told herself she had far more important things to worry about than her legs.
The journey to the Wall presented no opportunities. Sarah thought she caught sight of the Doctor's scarf twice, but had to convince herself it was a trick of her eyes when there was no other sign of him.
The Wall appeared to be black and amorphous. Neeva pointed to a shimmering tunnel. "See, it is as Xoanon promised. Leela and the girl will enter and he will be freed."
Leela's hand went to her hip and Sarah knew that the warrior planned to fight to the death. While she and Tomas might kill some of the raid as well, neither had any real chance of surviving. Sarah placed a steadying hand on Leela's.
"If we go through the tunnel we can find another way through the Wall and back to the Doctor."
"There is no other way through the Wall."
"There has to be another." Because Sarah wouldn't allow any other option.
Reluctantly, the two women walked through the tunnel. Calib raised a shout and the rest of the raid moved towards the tunnel behind them. Before the men could reach the Wall, bright spotlights caught each warrior where they stood. They screamed as they fell to the ground.
"Tomas." Leela turned back with panic in her voice, but the tunnel had closed. "Tomas." She pounded against the Wall but it wouldn't give.
Sarah let out her own gasp at the figure which approached. He wore what appeared to be some sort of space suit with a bright red coil going from the helmet down its back. Two heads, Sarah remembered Leela saying, and with the helmet Sarah finally understood.
Growling when she saw it, Leela pulled her knife. "Tesh." She moved forward but faltered and slowly fell at the Tesh's feet. The Tesh hadn't moved.
"Leela." Dropping to her knees, Sarah attempted to rouse her. "What did you do to her?" She meant to turn on the Tesh herself, but felt her muscles lock and she fell unconscious across Leela.
Sarah awoke miserably on a hard metal floor. She could tell she was in a control room of sorts, but the equipment was covered in pieces of cloth. Candles were on nearly every flat surface. Wires were pulled from the computers and tangled along the walls and ceiling much like the vines in the forest.
A man stood in front of her. He wore a gray uniform with white and red stripes, puffy sleeves, a flat-topped helmet, and green shoes. He smiled at her, but only his lips moved as if the rest of his features on his ashen face were frozen. "I am Jabel, Captain of the People of Tesh. You are Sarah. We have been waiting for you."
Sarah stood and tried to keep the quiver from her voice. "I know perfectly well whom I am. Where is Leela?" She hoped it sounded like a demand.
"Ah, the Savage. The others are tending to her."
Sarah's stomach tightened. "She is not a Savage. And I know what sort of tending your type does. Release us."
"I cannot. Xoanon has commanded it so."
"Xoanon? But he's the Sevateem's god." Sarah realized she had said something wrong when Jabel's face darkened.
"You will not speak so. Xoanon is around us. He is responsible for operating everything you see. He is with us in these wall, not with the Savages."
"He runs everything? Like a computer?" Sarah gasped -- a computer as xenophobic and arrogant as those Time Lord on Gallifrey. "He's been playing both sides, using you."
"Blasphemer. I know not what Xoanon wants with you, but you will not leave him this time."
"This time? But I've never met him before."
"You left him when he was just born. You told him he couldn't leave, but then left yourself. He's been waiting for your return."
The account was a sick parody of her plea at UNIT. The computer appeared to have some twisted form of the Doctor's memories from when he first regenerated. It would've seemed to the computer that she had left him after she had made the Doctor stay with her to assist UNIT. Xoanon was a computer with the Doctor's confused mind, all alone except for the two tribes he had been manipulating for generations.
The Doctor never did well when he was by himself. She wasn't sure she could talk her way into his graces when it was clear that the computer had gone quite mad. Xoanon must've sensed her presence when she walked through the barrier and fixated on her in a perversion of her friendship with the Doctor.
Under Jabel's orders, two other Tesh approached her. "Take her to the Sacred Chamber. Ensure she cannot leave even if you have to break her legs."
In her panic, she struggled against the guards, calling vainly for the Doctor, but she felt her body lock against her again as she was dragged from the room.
.:DW:.
2011/04/17
Chapter 3
Notes: I designed this story backwards and in my ambition, didn't even notice I was using the All Just a Dream trope. I don't particularly like this trope myself. When I decided to go ahead with my plan, I tried not to fall into all the pitfalls the trope brings, though I'm sure there are some I do. But my original design for the first chapter was much shorter and less engaging, so it would be less jarring for someone when I brought in the second timeline. I can promise this doesn't dissolve into Or Was It Just a Dream and also that I'm not going to forgo dark_fest and have the happy ending that All Just a Dream can sometime bring.
I like the story from my first chapter. I like this story too. I want to know how they both end. Sadly this is not that story, but those stories could come in the future.