(no subject)
Ok, so you may be wondering what this "I am thankful for" stuff is about. My coach says to make a list of things I "deal with" on a daily basis. I started doing this, and they basically turned into lists of complaints. i.e. "I didn't like that the plane was delayed, they ran out of peanuts, the temperature was too cold, the stewardess was inattentive, guy next to me stole my arm rest, laptop ran out of battery, etc."
So I gained two things from this activity. First, I think I was going about it all wrong because the list of "things you deal with" should not be identical to the list of "things you don't like." You could deal with something that is still enjoyable, like for example, time management, having a family or job that you love but that keeps you busy, a hobby that you want to pursue but can never find time to, people at work who help you, hurt you, teach you, criticize you, and feeling a certain way. So I guess the point of the activity was to go through your day very conscious and aware of what is happening to you, what is a pattern or habit and what is new, how you feel about things, what you would like to change, etc. It is not to make a hate list about your experiences.
Second, I realized that the "problem" to be dealt with was not this laundry list of things I dislike. It is not at all within my control whether they have peanuts or pretzels or how the stewardess is going to treat me. But the problem is the way I am engaging with these situations - letting things press my buttons when I should let them roll off my shoulders, letting one bad experience trigger a domino effect and turn it into a bad day, taking my grief out on the wrong people, and fuming about things instead of communicating about them properly and to the proper people and at the proper times.
I know it's cheesy to say "think positive" or "be an optimist" but I'm wondering if this may really help. Taking a different spin on each of your experiences, why they may have happened to you, what they taught you, etc. Even something like a bad day could be redeemed to a halfway decent day if you can recognize what's going on and stop it. If nothing else, it could be redeemed by being aware of your contributions to said bad day and ways to mitigate them in the future.
When I put aside the complaint list and really got down to the root question of "what do I deal with," I figured out a couple things that actually do belong on this list:
1. Pessimism (covered above)
2. Indecisiveness and second guessing myself (happens w/ relationships, career moves, projects, house hunting, etc. and worse yet, a lot of times I am so uncertain about a decision that I don't make it. I just stick with the status quo, unhappily but blissfully ignorant at not havin to knwo what could have been. OR you passively fall into decisions instead of actively designing your life. It's just a recipe for unhappiness.)
3. Running late / Procrastinating
4. Stress w/ Nadine
5. Teaching (and not enjoying it)
6. Traveling (and not enjoying it)
I am also realizing that I am an incredibly stressed out, anxious, emotional sort of person. I sometimes let this get the best of me. And I need to just be more aware of things like my body's biofeedback and when it is telling me to stop vs. keep going. I feel completely broken right now, like I just want to stop and sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep. I am thinking about doing that in a few weekends... just clear my calendar of dog stuff, work stuff, friend stuff, family stuff, turn off my phone and laptop, take my ambien and just crash. When I do wake up, go to a vinyasa class. Eat my favorite foods.
Anyway, on to the fun part of the entry. I am thankful that we were able to save this adorable little puggle who is laying next to me. I am thankful that I may have a house soon. I am thankful that I have parents who will keep me here, should I not have a house soon. I am thankful for vacations and frequent flyer miles. I am thankful that I am no longer in school. I am thankful that I have a paycheck, and that I don't drink or smoke as much as certain others. I am thankful that I guess my major "addictions" are working too hard, and throwing myself into an activity 110%. I see how those could be bad habits in the long run, but I don't think they are the worst habits to have.
So I gained two things from this activity. First, I think I was going about it all wrong because the list of "things you deal with" should not be identical to the list of "things you don't like." You could deal with something that is still enjoyable, like for example, time management, having a family or job that you love but that keeps you busy, a hobby that you want to pursue but can never find time to, people at work who help you, hurt you, teach you, criticize you, and feeling a certain way. So I guess the point of the activity was to go through your day very conscious and aware of what is happening to you, what is a pattern or habit and what is new, how you feel about things, what you would like to change, etc. It is not to make a hate list about your experiences.
Second, I realized that the "problem" to be dealt with was not this laundry list of things I dislike. It is not at all within my control whether they have peanuts or pretzels or how the stewardess is going to treat me. But the problem is the way I am engaging with these situations - letting things press my buttons when I should let them roll off my shoulders, letting one bad experience trigger a domino effect and turn it into a bad day, taking my grief out on the wrong people, and fuming about things instead of communicating about them properly and to the proper people and at the proper times.
I know it's cheesy to say "think positive" or "be an optimist" but I'm wondering if this may really help. Taking a different spin on each of your experiences, why they may have happened to you, what they taught you, etc. Even something like a bad day could be redeemed to a halfway decent day if you can recognize what's going on and stop it. If nothing else, it could be redeemed by being aware of your contributions to said bad day and ways to mitigate them in the future.
When I put aside the complaint list and really got down to the root question of "what do I deal with," I figured out a couple things that actually do belong on this list:
1. Pessimism (covered above)
2. Indecisiveness and second guessing myself (happens w/ relationships, career moves, projects, house hunting, etc. and worse yet, a lot of times I am so uncertain about a decision that I don't make it. I just stick with the status quo, unhappily but blissfully ignorant at not havin to knwo what could have been. OR you passively fall into decisions instead of actively designing your life. It's just a recipe for unhappiness.)
3. Running late / Procrastinating
4. Stress w/ Nadine
5. Teaching (and not enjoying it)
6. Traveling (and not enjoying it)
I am also realizing that I am an incredibly stressed out, anxious, emotional sort of person. I sometimes let this get the best of me. And I need to just be more aware of things like my body's biofeedback and when it is telling me to stop vs. keep going. I feel completely broken right now, like I just want to stop and sleep and sleep and sleep and sleep. I am thinking about doing that in a few weekends... just clear my calendar of dog stuff, work stuff, friend stuff, family stuff, turn off my phone and laptop, take my ambien and just crash. When I do wake up, go to a vinyasa class. Eat my favorite foods.
Anyway, on to the fun part of the entry. I am thankful that we were able to save this adorable little puggle who is laying next to me. I am thankful that I may have a house soon. I am thankful that I have parents who will keep me here, should I not have a house soon. I am thankful for vacations and frequent flyer miles. I am thankful that I am no longer in school. I am thankful that I have a paycheck, and that I don't drink or smoke as much as certain others. I am thankful that I guess my major "addictions" are working too hard, and throwing myself into an activity 110%. I see how those could be bad habits in the long run, but I don't think they are the worst habits to have.