This life sucks. Can I trade it in?
So I go to a job interview today to work at a call center. Inbound calls, no selling, plenty of time to read between calls, I'm sure. The first thing they have you do is take a typing test to make sure your speed is acceptable for their needs. Well I'm not a typist. I never took typing back in high school and for someone who used to be using two fingers and the hunt and peck method, I think I've improved drastically. Anyway, at least four of the keys on the keyboard I was using were blank. They had been used so long, the letters had rubbed off. I had to think about where the letters were when I needed to hit them. This slowed me down and of course I wasn't fast enough for them. If you don't pass step one, you can't move on to step two.
"We have your application and resume on file. Take some time to practice your typing skills. Check back on our website for the next job fair and you're welcome to try again."
They are kidding, right. I left them and headed out to a Randstad office nearby. My thinking: Maybe if they can put a face to the name, I might have a better chance of being chosen when assignments are available. I didn't have a copy of my resume with me logically thinking, 'What good is a paper resume? Aren't they just going to scan it and add it to their digital files? I'll email it and save them the extra step.' How kind of me, don't you think?
So I left the first office and drove to another one. Like most places, they have more help than they know what to do with. "But send us your resume anyway. If things pick up and your skills match what we need, we'll give you a call." I don't blame them. If they don't have jobs, they can't offer people any hope of maybe finding one. I know I can't expect others to do the work for me. I have to put in the time myself to get hired.
I'm done. I've had enough. Call me a quitter, I don't care anymore. I'm strong enough to handle alot of k-rap, but I think I've tried to hold on for too long. I've lost my last thread of rope and, folks, I'm sorry to say it's over. I'm packing it in. I'm selling my house...or at least I'm going to try to before they foreclose on me. I'll be selling as much stuff as I can part with. The rest I'll give away. I don't know where I'll end up after that, but I can't hold out hope anymore that things will get better.
I can't blame the person I let move in and not help out. I let them do it. I can't blame the person who talked me into racking up more credit card debt than I could afford to pay. I was weak and wanted the stuff I could get. I can't blame the company who let me go from my job without asking where my loyalties lied. They were doing what they thought was right. I can't blame the job market in Georgia that is flooded with more applicants than there are positions available. I don't know where to turn.
What bothers me is not that I can't find an office job. What bothers me is that I can't even get hired at Target or Taco Bell. I'm asking for minimum wage, people. How much lower can I go? I picked up a copy of Creative Loafing a few weeks ago and saw the ad looking for people to be in Adult films. I can't say I didn't consider it for a few hours. At this point, I would be an escort if I thought I was pretty enough to get hired. As long as I can stay out of jail, I might do just about anything.
I'm done, folks. The only thing keeping me in this state are the people I have come to know and treasure through the AtlantaHP group. (Thank you, Traci.) You have help to keep my spirits lifted far longer than I would have been able to do on my own. With the power of internet and email, I'm sure no matter where I end up, I'll keep in contact with them. My heart is not in Georgia, people. I don't know where it is, but I guess I should go find it. I'm tired of living without it.