FIC: A Sinking Feeling (3/?)
Author’s Note: So this has been a tough week/weekend for me. I got my wisdom teeth out this past Tuesday and have felt worthless ever since. Lack of teeth = pain = inability to eat protein-enriched chicken/fish = anemic Kat = depression. So, if you like this chapter, please please please comment, eh? Would make me feel better.
Previous Chapters: Ch.1 Ch.2
The Table Shifted Beneath Your Weight, Mr. Alien
“You’re kidding, aren’t you?” I asked, bewildered. “You can’t be serious about what you’re about to-”
“I’m entirely serious,” Jack interrupted, causing me to frown. If he’s not the root of my frown-lines someday, I don’t know what will be. He turned toward the stage, wolf-whistling.
“Jack, stop it,” I warned. He ignored me, so I ignored him. Walking away, I felt someone grab me from behind. “Whoa, there, I didn’t mean anything by it but if you want to make up, that’s fine by - Ow!” I yelped, a sharp pain running down my left leg. “Bloody hell, Jack, like I said, I’m sorry for being an asshole, but you didn’t have to - What the fuck?!” I struggled to turn around, but Jack had his arms around me so tightly, and the pain in my leg was so unbearable, that I couldn’t.
“Be quiet, and no one’ll get ‘urt, buddy,” someone growled.
“Jack, I - I didn’t know you were into that.” After a calculating pause, I whispered, “It’s kind o’ hot …”
Jack chuckled and tightened his grip around my abdomen. “I’m not Jack,” he murmured. He held a menacing tone that I wasn’t sure I liked.
“Then we’re role-playing?”
“No.”
“Then what are we-”
“Stop asking questions, bastard, or I’ll pop you so fast you won’t know what hit you.”
“Jack, you’re really scaring me now.”
“Good. Because Jack’s in the same position you are, and if you talk again, with Ofaku Aghetho as my witness, I will slit his throat.”
I couldn’t help but mutter under my breath, “Oh, fuck you too,” as he shoved me forward. In retrospect, my sarcasm wasn’t worth the wrath I received.
“Trust me, Human Two, do not insult us. You will regret it.” His warning was followed by a sucking sound and a shot of pain through my side so intense that I arched my back. I sensed that Jack was experiencing the same punishment, as I heard a scream of agony.
I felt something trickle down my side and soak through my trousers, but I was unable to look down. I did, however, have a sinking feeling that it was my own blood.
A shrill scream flooded the room and my captor swung me around. I could hardly look, but something compelled me to.
Across the lowered curtain of the stage was written, in a dark red, dripping substance, the word “Whore.” Hanging from a swing, conveniently suspended from the ceiling, was Mistress Bellevue, feet tied to the wooden plank, and arms tied above her head. She was dead. A wave of guilt spread over me, the memory of earlier that night, when I accusatorily thought of her as exactly that - a dirty whore.
“George!” Mistress Bellevue called from next to the stage. I glanced to my right. Yes, it was the same feather-clad woman that performed the fan-dance each night. Whore, I thought to myself, focusing on finishing my song. “George, the Captain wishes to speak with you!”
“Oh, it’s all my fault. It has to be my fault …” I gasped, making eye contact with Jack from across the room. The pain saturating his eyes was almost unbearable. I looked past the blood dripping from his stomach, and saw that there was a metal spider that appeared to grow from his skin.
I tried to look down, but something was keeping me paralysed in my current position. It had to be the ‘spider.’ I looked at it again. Was the crystal … I checked my eyes, mentally shaking my head. It was … pink?
“What’s so sinister about pink?” I asked innocently. I personally kind of liked the colour … well, generally. When it wasn’t overused. Evening gowns were pink. I remember Daisy’s mother having one about the same shade as the crystal. Fits. Evil equals evil.
“Human Two is not in any position to ask Phaaqyiap Moon questions.”
“Am I correct to assume that George Caldwell is Human Two?”
“Human Two is not in any position to ask Phaaqyiap Moon questions.”
“I can fuck you up, and I can fuck you down, but there’s no way I’m going to the moon.”
“It appears that Human Two has a large tongue, Aphmiomchu,” Phaaqyiap Moon grumbled. Whoever he was talking to snarled and squished past us.
My captor’s comrade walked by, shoving Jack in front of him. He winked at me and blurted, “Not the only thing that’s big.” I didn’t look at who was holding Jack’s arms behind his back in dread I’d scream and be tortured more, and his wince of pain and muffled grunt confirmed my fears. I heard another sucking sound, and more pain. My reflexes were dead. I could only stand there and take whatever they dealt out to us.
“Phaaqyiap Moon and Aphmiomchu will decide how long his life is if you continue to talk with such contempt,” Jack’s hijacker hissed. Jack shot me a meaningful glare as he and whatever was behind him moved out of the lounge and into the corridor. As my captor and I made out way after them, I could only wonder what had happened to the rest of Jack’s team.
When we arrived in the Captain’s Quarters for the second time that night, Gwen was stood in the corner, shuffling through a file folder. Her back was to us. She was a sitting duck to whatever they had planned for her. I wished I could call out to her - although I didn’t like her, I would have hated for her to die an untimely death - but knew that if I did, Jack and I would suffer more.
Surprisingly, nothing happened to Gwen.
Jack and I fell flatly on the floor with two thuds, our faces in the hardwood and carpet. You’ve got to be kidding me. There’s a time and a place for lying facedown, tied up, on a beautiful floor, but I hardly would think this is it! Our creatures had let us go. I was unable to move, however, to see what they were doing. I hoped that Gwen, of all people, wouldn’t have to watch us having sex with … with … well, whoever’d had us in their grasps.
“Great,” I breathed. “This feels very awkward. I’ve never been with something like this before …”
“Meh, I have,” Jack reassured, “Nothing spectacular.” I let the feeling of shock wash over my body and attempted to let it go, but a strange throbbing was bugging me. This … is ridiculous. How can I be aroused by the thought of Jack shacking up with some strange … erm … creature, with names that sound like innuendo-filled phrases?
“Phaaqyiap Moon is always in your service,” whoever held me hostage said. He had a gravelly, almost nasally voice. They couldn’t have been talking to us … Gwen?
She spun at the sound of their praise, her eyes once again wide with confusion, and most likely fear.
“P-pardon?” she stammered, clutching the file folder. “Who are you?”
“Phaaqyiap Moon. You are our queen.”
“Since when am I-” A thought struck her; her reaction was visible. “Wait a moment … How do you know who I am?”
“Any woman to us is our queen.”
“There are many women on this ship, sir. Why did you choose me?” She crept to the side, holding herself upright.
“The other women were too promiscuous.” Jack snorted from beside me. “You are pure.” I heard him giggle, and made a mental note, if we ever got out of this alive, to ask him later why he found it so funny.
“Ah … what are my - erm - duties as your queen, then?”
“You will marry one of us, and kill these men.” Her eyes remained wide.
“Why do I have to kill them?” Gwen cocked her head in uncertainty. “What have they done to you?”
“They’re dirty creatures, vile, disrespectful. We must rid ourselves of them.”
“There have got to be ways to do that other than - than - murder, don’t you think?”
“No.”
Gwen sent us a look that clearly said, “I’ll do all that I can. I’m sorry,” and sat in the chair behind the desk. “How am I to execute them, then?”
“They have been secured with a device that drains their energy, but only you have control over how much.”
“Me?” Gwen yelped. “I mean - Um - why do I have control over how much energy they lose? Wouldn’t it be easier to have a - um - set amount for - er - each hour?” She can’t lie. She will be the death of us.
“No.” Gwen subtly rolled her eyes and looked away, staring down at us.
“Okay … Well then … How do I control these - devices, did you say?”
“Yes. They are clasped to their pancreas. Depending on how merciful or brutal you find yourself, you can order them to diminish their energy levels by whatever percentage you deem fit.” They sounded excited, in my opinion. If I knew Gwen, we’d be awake the entire time.
Jack moaned, and I glanced over at his body, worried for him. He glanced at me and then at Gwen, who was staring at him. She nodded slowly and raised a nonchalant hand to her ear to push her hair over her shoulder. Her hand lingered there for a moment.
“So I suppose when they don’t really … erm … fight back, I have no reason to drain their energy levels, right?” I heard a pounding on the floor and looked up to find a creature standing next to me.
“Yes, but you must realize, Your Highness, that these men are dangerous to our race.”
“I see. What did they do, again?”
“They are vile.”
“Why?”
“Who’s questioning who?”
“Your queen is questioning her - uh - minions?”
I heard a pained gasp and the creature bowed his reptilian head, placing a clawed hand across his chest.
“You are correct, Your Highness. I apologize for my disloyalty.” Gwen smirked, but said nothing. “I heard them in a lavatory. I saw them from the sink.”
Aphmiomchu spoke then. “They were doing vile things, hurting each other, it seemed.” Gwen turned a strange shade of pink, but there was a green hue beneath her rosy cheeks.
“And …who was doing this to whom?” Gwen inquired, looking like she didn’t really care to know, but needed to ask to hold up her role.
“The one on the left. He was kneeling, as if worshipping the man next to him. But he had him in his mouth, Your Highness. It was most revolting.” I squeezed my eyes shut, remembering the feeling. Jack … oh, Jesus. Gwen made a strangled noise and Aphmiomchu rushed forward, jumping Jack and me. “Your Highness! You are upset?”
“Only - Well, only about ten percent.” Jack and I looked at each other, suddenly a bit drowsy. That was what the people had meant. Gwen shook her head.
“Is … well … is there any way to restore their energy levels?”
“No.”
“Oh.” Another apologetic gaze. Jack shook his head, smiling. She turned to the creature closest to her. “Did you say your name was ‘Aphmiomchu’?” she asked.
“Yes. I am Aphmiomchu Ensomoddos.” Jack chortled from beside me.
“Does the hostage have a problem with my name?”
“No. I mean, I’d have you on me in a flash, but I’m not a modest person, I’m sorry.” He dropped his head into the floor and burst into giggles.
“It is times like these, Your Highness, that you deprive them of energy.”
“I - I think it’ll get worse if … if …” Something I couldn’t hear made her laugh. When she regained her composure, she finished her explanation with a hasty, “I think his ridiculousness will worsen if we reduce his energy levels any more. Continue with your justification of why they should be executed?”
“Your Highness, after the one on the left got up off the floor, the one on the right spun him around,” Phaaqyiap Moon began.
“And then pressed him against the wall. He did something I couldn’t see, with a small tube of what appeared to be fruit jelly,” Aphmiomchu finished.
“Hm. Go on.” Gwen sat with her hand over her mouth, covering her smirk.
“And, Your Highness, I regret saying this already - They appeared to have … relations.” Phaaqyiap Moon hung his head in shame.
“Human relations, to be exact,” Aphmiomchu corrected academically. He too looked embarrassed.
“Oh, I know I’ll regret asking this …” Gwen murmured breathily before saying aloud, “How do human relations differ from … erm …” After a short pause, she asked, “Alien relations?”
“On our planet, we reproduce with tubes.”
“Of fruit jelly?” Jack muttered against the carpet.
“Such disrespect deserves punishment, Your Highness.”
“I’m queen, I’ll deal with them when I feel I have reason to.” Another thought seemed to strike her.
“Your Highness is confused?”
“Very. In fact, I’m not quite sure why I’m your queen, fellas.”
“You’re our queen because our last queen … may she rest in eternal bliss …”
“Of course.”
“She died a horrible death. It seems that the Timelord felt he had to execute her.” Jack’s head snapped up, but he didn’t make a sound.
“I’m so sorry to hear that.” I watched Jack send Gwen a telling look, but she didn’t notice.
“You’ve met the Timelord?” he blurted.
“Met? He tried to ruin us,” Phaaqyiap Moon growled, turning.
“The Doctor doesn’t kill.”
“You’re not in any position to argue.”
“And what position are you in to tell me that?”
“Jack!” Gwen shouted. “Stop!”
“Fine, but know that The Doctor doesn’t kill unless it’s necessary. You must be a dangerous race for him to make an attempt of decimation against your planet.” Both Phaaqyiap Moon and Aphmiamchu snarled, starting toward us.
“Our last queen was peaceful, respectable.”
“Did she allow you to take innocent people hostage?”
“You’re far from innocent, Human One.”
“I have a name.”
“And I have a queen.”
“And I am your current queen,” Gwen snapped, “And I order you to step away from your - our - hostages.” Phaaqyiap Moon stepped away, grudgingly, as if he were forced to.
“I apologize, Queen Cooper.”
“Cooper?”
“My name is Gwen Cooper.”
“Your name is Queen Tazh PhaHudev, Your Highness.”
“Queen Tazh PhaHudev it is …”
Three hours later, Jack and I were still bound on the floor of the Captain’s Quarters, Gwen staring at the aliens with fake loyalty.
“This is ridiculous.”
“I can hear you talking,” Aphmiomchu snarled from his seat on the edge of the table. “You do not want me to hear you talking.”
“Yes we do,” Jack snapped back, “We want you to know that this is ridiculous and getting you nowhere.” Why are you including me in this???
“Your Highness, would you please-”
“No.”
“Are these your friends, Queen Tazh PhaHudev?” Aphmiomchu spat, gesturing toward us. I glanced at Jack. The time was nearing when Gwen would have to punish us somehow. My only question was where the others in the team were. Ianto, Tosh, and Owen were nowhere to be seen.
“How dare you speak my name!” Gwen shouted suddenly, banging the desk’s top with her palms. “If you show such blatant distrust against me again, I shall remove the energy combustion device from the hostages and attach them to you.” She yawned, bored, and leant back into the chair.
The two aliens knelt instantly, apologising.
“Tell me, minions,” Gwen began. It appeared to me that she was enjoying this placement of power far too much for her own good. “Tell me, am I your leader, entirely?”
“Our team has a captain, Your Highness.”
“Does it? And who is your ‘captain?’”
“Ofaku Aghetho is our captain, Your Highness. We are all at your service.”
“And, as your queen, I don’t suppose …” Gwen trailed off, thinking. After a moment, Phaaqyiap Moon raised his head to look at her.
“You don’t suppose … ?”
“I don’t suppose I could command you to fetch him, would I?” She was grasping at strings. Trying to get them to leave her alone with us … trying to give us a chance at escape.
“No, Your Highness, I apologise, but you cannot.”
“Why?” Gwen asked indignantly. “I’m your queen, aren’t I?”
“Yes.” Phaaqyiap Moon shook his head sadly. “But one of us must be here to protect you at all times.”
“I highly doubt that I’m in any danger. Look at the prisoners.” She waved her hand at us casually. “They’re tied up, tossed on the floor. They’re unable to move, yet you feel I’m in some apparent danger?”
“Yes.”
“I’m not going to argue. I want to see your captain as soon as possible.”
“That will take a while.”
“Then I’d suggest you leave now.”
“I will stay, then, Aphmiomchu. You will retrieve Ofaku Aghetho and bring him back here. Take prisoners along the way if needed.”
“No, Phaaqyiap Moon. You can both go. I can handle myself.”
“Ofaku Aghetho will not hear of it.”
“Then Ofaku Aghetho will not know.” Gwen shot both of the reptilians an angry glare, before both bowed their heads and left wordlessly.
“Finally, some rest.” Gwen got up and approached us, squatting down to press touch Jack’s ear. Her confused frown worried me. “Where’s your earpiece?” she finally asked.
“Hm. I don’t know, actually. I had it, and then I felt incredible pain and didn’t really focus on anything else. Sorry for losing it in my moment of pure agony,” came his sarcastic reply. “Anyway, untie us so we can get out of here.”
“I can’t.”
“What?” She touched the shackles we were bound with and maintained her frown.
“They’re some sort of weird alien metal.”
“Shoot it?”
“And if I take off both of your hands?” Jack laughed. “What’s so funny? I’d think it would be more tragic, not being able to go to Ianto and-”
“Hold it right there, Cooper. I don’t think it’s that big of a-”
“What if you miss and kill him?” I stammered suddenly. Gwen shot Jack a worried look, and he shook his head.
Jack turned his head to me and grinned. “Not a problem. Besides, I’m sure your ship would be happy to get rid of such a vile, disrespectful, and dirty creature such as myself.” I longed to reach out and take his face in my hands … but they were tied together. Damn it.
I settled on gently saying, “You could never be vile …” Jack rolled his eyes so I yelled at him. When someone blows me off like that, they deserve a sound lashing. “You’re the best person I’ve ever met. Your values really reflect what the world should be like, and I’m not saying that just because we had sex in the bathroom today. I’m saying that because it’s true.” Gwen turned a bright shade of red. “Sorry, Gwen, but this must be said. Second, disrespectful my arse. So you’re outgoing and self-confident; big fucking deal. People need to get over that.” I stopped talking, debating with myself whether to go into the accusation of Jack being ‘dirty.’
“You forgot one.”
“Do I really have to tell you how dirty you are?” I crinkled my nose jokingly and grinned. Jack laughed and shook his head.
“No, I guess you don’t.”
“I mean, if you wanted me to, I would.”
“You don’t have to, George.”
“No, I can, if you want me to.”
“George, you don’t have to!”
“Oh, come on, don’t be such a girl.”
“’Scuse me? Don’t insult women,” Gwen glared teasingly from her new seat behind the desk.
“What? Why not?”
“Because I can deplete your energy levels with a single command.”
“Oh, right,” Jack mocked, “Our sincerest apologies, Queen Tazh PhaHudev.”
“You’re forgiven.” Gwen smiled and looked between Jack and me. “How did you two meet?” I glanced at Jack and grinned.
“A bar.”
“How many years ago was that? I forget.” I couldn’t believe Jack had forgotten. What we’d had was so special … My grin swiftly fell into a frown, and I shifted my gaze to the floor.
“Over a decade.” I stared at the floor, tears of resentment flooding my eyes. I couldn’t bring myself to trouble him at a time like this, so I whispered, “Twelve years, three - hundred - and - forty days, and eighteen hours.”
“Are you alright, George?” Gwen murmured. I shook my head.
“Not at all.” I could see her frown in m peripheral vision; I wasn’t one to accept pity, and I wasn’t going to change that now. I ignored it determinedly. She got up and crossed the room to where I lay, placing a gentle hand on my back.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing anyone really worries about anymore. Must be time stored away in a bottle somewhere for them, but for me, I only have minutes. And the past twelve years, three - hundred - and - forty days, and eighteen hours have been Hell for me.” My head snapped to look at Jack. “I’ve missed you, but obviously all you care about now is your little Ianto. And all you need me for is a quick shag when it’s convenient for you. No one cares about past loves. But maybe, Jack, just maybe, you didn’t love me at all.”
“George, listen to me-” Jack began.
I interrupted with a snarl. “Captain Harkness, excuse my blunt response, but screw you. Forget about me. I’m not here. Forget who I am.” I turned my head, but decided to add something as an after thought.
“In fact, Captain … Forget I ever loved you.”
Author’s Note: Hey … Erm … Yowza, I know those Alien Names were toughies, weren’t they? Well, I decided to help you out for the upcoming chapter. These are my interpretations; do with them what you will.
Pronunciation Key and Background:
Ofaku Aghetho - Oh-Fahk-Oo Ah-Geth-Oh - the captain of Jack and George’s captors’ militia.
Phaaqyiap Moon - Fahk-yee-up Moon - George’s Captor. Reptilian. Brutal. More controlling over hostages.
Aphmiomchu Ensomoddos - Af-Me-Om-Chu En-som-oh-dos - Jack’s Captor. Also Reptilian. Brutal, but shier. Depends on fear of hostages to dominate, versus his partner who takes fear and replaces it with terror on his own whim.
Queen Tazh PhaHudev - Queen Tahz Fa-Hoo-Dev - Gwen Cooper. Only … not. New queen of homophobic tribe of Aliens.
If you feel like it, go ahead and try to guess who each part of this, minus Torchwood, represents in reality. Queen Tazh PhaHudev is included in this competition. Enclose guesses in comments :) I love comments.
Previous Chapters: Ch.1 Ch.2
The Table Shifted Beneath Your Weight, Mr. Alien
“You’re kidding, aren’t you?” I asked, bewildered. “You can’t be serious about what you’re about to-”
“I’m entirely serious,” Jack interrupted, causing me to frown. If he’s not the root of my frown-lines someday, I don’t know what will be. He turned toward the stage, wolf-whistling.
“Jack, stop it,” I warned. He ignored me, so I ignored him. Walking away, I felt someone grab me from behind. “Whoa, there, I didn’t mean anything by it but if you want to make up, that’s fine by - Ow!” I yelped, a sharp pain running down my left leg. “Bloody hell, Jack, like I said, I’m sorry for being an asshole, but you didn’t have to - What the fuck?!” I struggled to turn around, but Jack had his arms around me so tightly, and the pain in my leg was so unbearable, that I couldn’t.
“Be quiet, and no one’ll get ‘urt, buddy,” someone growled.
“Jack, I - I didn’t know you were into that.” After a calculating pause, I whispered, “It’s kind o’ hot …”
Jack chuckled and tightened his grip around my abdomen. “I’m not Jack,” he murmured. He held a menacing tone that I wasn’t sure I liked.
“Then we’re role-playing?”
“No.”
“Then what are we-”
“Stop asking questions, bastard, or I’ll pop you so fast you won’t know what hit you.”
“Jack, you’re really scaring me now.”
“Good. Because Jack’s in the same position you are, and if you talk again, with Ofaku Aghetho as my witness, I will slit his throat.”
I couldn’t help but mutter under my breath, “Oh, fuck you too,” as he shoved me forward. In retrospect, my sarcasm wasn’t worth the wrath I received.
“Trust me, Human Two, do not insult us. You will regret it.” His warning was followed by a sucking sound and a shot of pain through my side so intense that I arched my back. I sensed that Jack was experiencing the same punishment, as I heard a scream of agony.
I felt something trickle down my side and soak through my trousers, but I was unable to look down. I did, however, have a sinking feeling that it was my own blood.
A shrill scream flooded the room and my captor swung me around. I could hardly look, but something compelled me to.
Across the lowered curtain of the stage was written, in a dark red, dripping substance, the word “Whore.” Hanging from a swing, conveniently suspended from the ceiling, was Mistress Bellevue, feet tied to the wooden plank, and arms tied above her head. She was dead. A wave of guilt spread over me, the memory of earlier that night, when I accusatorily thought of her as exactly that - a dirty whore.
“George!” Mistress Bellevue called from next to the stage. I glanced to my right. Yes, it was the same feather-clad woman that performed the fan-dance each night. Whore, I thought to myself, focusing on finishing my song. “George, the Captain wishes to speak with you!”
“Oh, it’s all my fault. It has to be my fault …” I gasped, making eye contact with Jack from across the room. The pain saturating his eyes was almost unbearable. I looked past the blood dripping from his stomach, and saw that there was a metal spider that appeared to grow from his skin.
I tried to look down, but something was keeping me paralysed in my current position. It had to be the ‘spider.’ I looked at it again. Was the crystal … I checked my eyes, mentally shaking my head. It was … pink?
“What’s so sinister about pink?” I asked innocently. I personally kind of liked the colour … well, generally. When it wasn’t overused. Evening gowns were pink. I remember Daisy’s mother having one about the same shade as the crystal. Fits. Evil equals evil.
“Human Two is not in any position to ask Phaaqyiap Moon questions.”
“Am I correct to assume that George Caldwell is Human Two?”
“Human Two is not in any position to ask Phaaqyiap Moon questions.”
“I can fuck you up, and I can fuck you down, but there’s no way I’m going to the moon.”
“It appears that Human Two has a large tongue, Aphmiomchu,” Phaaqyiap Moon grumbled. Whoever he was talking to snarled and squished past us.
My captor’s comrade walked by, shoving Jack in front of him. He winked at me and blurted, “Not the only thing that’s big.” I didn’t look at who was holding Jack’s arms behind his back in dread I’d scream and be tortured more, and his wince of pain and muffled grunt confirmed my fears. I heard another sucking sound, and more pain. My reflexes were dead. I could only stand there and take whatever they dealt out to us.
“Phaaqyiap Moon and Aphmiomchu will decide how long his life is if you continue to talk with such contempt,” Jack’s hijacker hissed. Jack shot me a meaningful glare as he and whatever was behind him moved out of the lounge and into the corridor. As my captor and I made out way after them, I could only wonder what had happened to the rest of Jack’s team.
When we arrived in the Captain’s Quarters for the second time that night, Gwen was stood in the corner, shuffling through a file folder. Her back was to us. She was a sitting duck to whatever they had planned for her. I wished I could call out to her - although I didn’t like her, I would have hated for her to die an untimely death - but knew that if I did, Jack and I would suffer more.
Surprisingly, nothing happened to Gwen.
Jack and I fell flatly on the floor with two thuds, our faces in the hardwood and carpet. You’ve got to be kidding me. There’s a time and a place for lying facedown, tied up, on a beautiful floor, but I hardly would think this is it! Our creatures had let us go. I was unable to move, however, to see what they were doing. I hoped that Gwen, of all people, wouldn’t have to watch us having sex with … with … well, whoever’d had us in their grasps.
“Great,” I breathed. “This feels very awkward. I’ve never been with something like this before …”
“Meh, I have,” Jack reassured, “Nothing spectacular.” I let the feeling of shock wash over my body and attempted to let it go, but a strange throbbing was bugging me. This … is ridiculous. How can I be aroused by the thought of Jack shacking up with some strange … erm … creature, with names that sound like innuendo-filled phrases?
“Phaaqyiap Moon is always in your service,” whoever held me hostage said. He had a gravelly, almost nasally voice. They couldn’t have been talking to us … Gwen?
She spun at the sound of their praise, her eyes once again wide with confusion, and most likely fear.
“P-pardon?” she stammered, clutching the file folder. “Who are you?”
“Phaaqyiap Moon. You are our queen.”
“Since when am I-” A thought struck her; her reaction was visible. “Wait a moment … How do you know who I am?”
“Any woman to us is our queen.”
“There are many women on this ship, sir. Why did you choose me?” She crept to the side, holding herself upright.
“The other women were too promiscuous.” Jack snorted from beside me. “You are pure.” I heard him giggle, and made a mental note, if we ever got out of this alive, to ask him later why he found it so funny.
“Ah … what are my - erm - duties as your queen, then?”
“You will marry one of us, and kill these men.” Her eyes remained wide.
“Why do I have to kill them?” Gwen cocked her head in uncertainty. “What have they done to you?”
“They’re dirty creatures, vile, disrespectful. We must rid ourselves of them.”
“There have got to be ways to do that other than - than - murder, don’t you think?”
“No.”
Gwen sent us a look that clearly said, “I’ll do all that I can. I’m sorry,” and sat in the chair behind the desk. “How am I to execute them, then?”
“They have been secured with a device that drains their energy, but only you have control over how much.”
“Me?” Gwen yelped. “I mean - Um - why do I have control over how much energy they lose? Wouldn’t it be easier to have a - um - set amount for - er - each hour?” She can’t lie. She will be the death of us.
“No.” Gwen subtly rolled her eyes and looked away, staring down at us.
“Okay … Well then … How do I control these - devices, did you say?”
“Yes. They are clasped to their pancreas. Depending on how merciful or brutal you find yourself, you can order them to diminish their energy levels by whatever percentage you deem fit.” They sounded excited, in my opinion. If I knew Gwen, we’d be awake the entire time.
Jack moaned, and I glanced over at his body, worried for him. He glanced at me and then at Gwen, who was staring at him. She nodded slowly and raised a nonchalant hand to her ear to push her hair over her shoulder. Her hand lingered there for a moment.
“So I suppose when they don’t really … erm … fight back, I have no reason to drain their energy levels, right?” I heard a pounding on the floor and looked up to find a creature standing next to me.
“Yes, but you must realize, Your Highness, that these men are dangerous to our race.”
“I see. What did they do, again?”
“They are vile.”
“Why?”
“Who’s questioning who?”
“Your queen is questioning her - uh - minions?”
I heard a pained gasp and the creature bowed his reptilian head, placing a clawed hand across his chest.
“You are correct, Your Highness. I apologize for my disloyalty.” Gwen smirked, but said nothing. “I heard them in a lavatory. I saw them from the sink.”
Aphmiomchu spoke then. “They were doing vile things, hurting each other, it seemed.” Gwen turned a strange shade of pink, but there was a green hue beneath her rosy cheeks.
“And …who was doing this to whom?” Gwen inquired, looking like she didn’t really care to know, but needed to ask to hold up her role.
“The one on the left. He was kneeling, as if worshipping the man next to him. But he had him in his mouth, Your Highness. It was most revolting.” I squeezed my eyes shut, remembering the feeling. Jack … oh, Jesus. Gwen made a strangled noise and Aphmiomchu rushed forward, jumping Jack and me. “Your Highness! You are upset?”
“Only - Well, only about ten percent.” Jack and I looked at each other, suddenly a bit drowsy. That was what the people had meant. Gwen shook her head.
“Is … well … is there any way to restore their energy levels?”
“No.”
“Oh.” Another apologetic gaze. Jack shook his head, smiling. She turned to the creature closest to her. “Did you say your name was ‘Aphmiomchu’?” she asked.
“Yes. I am Aphmiomchu Ensomoddos.” Jack chortled from beside me.
“Does the hostage have a problem with my name?”
“No. I mean, I’d have you on me in a flash, but I’m not a modest person, I’m sorry.” He dropped his head into the floor and burst into giggles.
“It is times like these, Your Highness, that you deprive them of energy.”
“I - I think it’ll get worse if … if …” Something I couldn’t hear made her laugh. When she regained her composure, she finished her explanation with a hasty, “I think his ridiculousness will worsen if we reduce his energy levels any more. Continue with your justification of why they should be executed?”
“Your Highness, after the one on the left got up off the floor, the one on the right spun him around,” Phaaqyiap Moon began.
“And then pressed him against the wall. He did something I couldn’t see, with a small tube of what appeared to be fruit jelly,” Aphmiomchu finished.
“Hm. Go on.” Gwen sat with her hand over her mouth, covering her smirk.
“And, Your Highness, I regret saying this already - They appeared to have … relations.” Phaaqyiap Moon hung his head in shame.
“Human relations, to be exact,” Aphmiomchu corrected academically. He too looked embarrassed.
“Oh, I know I’ll regret asking this …” Gwen murmured breathily before saying aloud, “How do human relations differ from … erm …” After a short pause, she asked, “Alien relations?”
“On our planet, we reproduce with tubes.”
“Of fruit jelly?” Jack muttered against the carpet.
“Such disrespect deserves punishment, Your Highness.”
“I’m queen, I’ll deal with them when I feel I have reason to.” Another thought seemed to strike her.
“Your Highness is confused?”
“Very. In fact, I’m not quite sure why I’m your queen, fellas.”
“You’re our queen because our last queen … may she rest in eternal bliss …”
“Of course.”
“She died a horrible death. It seems that the Timelord felt he had to execute her.” Jack’s head snapped up, but he didn’t make a sound.
“I’m so sorry to hear that.” I watched Jack send Gwen a telling look, but she didn’t notice.
“You’ve met the Timelord?” he blurted.
“Met? He tried to ruin us,” Phaaqyiap Moon growled, turning.
“The Doctor doesn’t kill.”
“You’re not in any position to argue.”
“And what position are you in to tell me that?”
“Jack!” Gwen shouted. “Stop!”
“Fine, but know that The Doctor doesn’t kill unless it’s necessary. You must be a dangerous race for him to make an attempt of decimation against your planet.” Both Phaaqyiap Moon and Aphmiamchu snarled, starting toward us.
“Our last queen was peaceful, respectable.”
“Did she allow you to take innocent people hostage?”
“You’re far from innocent, Human One.”
“I have a name.”
“And I have a queen.”
“And I am your current queen,” Gwen snapped, “And I order you to step away from your - our - hostages.” Phaaqyiap Moon stepped away, grudgingly, as if he were forced to.
“I apologize, Queen Cooper.”
“Cooper?”
“My name is Gwen Cooper.”
“Your name is Queen Tazh PhaHudev, Your Highness.”
“Queen Tazh PhaHudev it is …”
Three hours later, Jack and I were still bound on the floor of the Captain’s Quarters, Gwen staring at the aliens with fake loyalty.
“This is ridiculous.”
“I can hear you talking,” Aphmiomchu snarled from his seat on the edge of the table. “You do not want me to hear you talking.”
“Yes we do,” Jack snapped back, “We want you to know that this is ridiculous and getting you nowhere.” Why are you including me in this???
“Your Highness, would you please-”
“No.”
“Are these your friends, Queen Tazh PhaHudev?” Aphmiomchu spat, gesturing toward us. I glanced at Jack. The time was nearing when Gwen would have to punish us somehow. My only question was where the others in the team were. Ianto, Tosh, and Owen were nowhere to be seen.
“How dare you speak my name!” Gwen shouted suddenly, banging the desk’s top with her palms. “If you show such blatant distrust against me again, I shall remove the energy combustion device from the hostages and attach them to you.” She yawned, bored, and leant back into the chair.
The two aliens knelt instantly, apologising.
“Tell me, minions,” Gwen began. It appeared to me that she was enjoying this placement of power far too much for her own good. “Tell me, am I your leader, entirely?”
“Our team has a captain, Your Highness.”
“Does it? And who is your ‘captain?’”
“Ofaku Aghetho is our captain, Your Highness. We are all at your service.”
“And, as your queen, I don’t suppose …” Gwen trailed off, thinking. After a moment, Phaaqyiap Moon raised his head to look at her.
“You don’t suppose … ?”
“I don’t suppose I could command you to fetch him, would I?” She was grasping at strings. Trying to get them to leave her alone with us … trying to give us a chance at escape.
“No, Your Highness, I apologise, but you cannot.”
“Why?” Gwen asked indignantly. “I’m your queen, aren’t I?”
“Yes.” Phaaqyiap Moon shook his head sadly. “But one of us must be here to protect you at all times.”
“I highly doubt that I’m in any danger. Look at the prisoners.” She waved her hand at us casually. “They’re tied up, tossed on the floor. They’re unable to move, yet you feel I’m in some apparent danger?”
“Yes.”
“I’m not going to argue. I want to see your captain as soon as possible.”
“That will take a while.”
“Then I’d suggest you leave now.”
“I will stay, then, Aphmiomchu. You will retrieve Ofaku Aghetho and bring him back here. Take prisoners along the way if needed.”
“No, Phaaqyiap Moon. You can both go. I can handle myself.”
“Ofaku Aghetho will not hear of it.”
“Then Ofaku Aghetho will not know.” Gwen shot both of the reptilians an angry glare, before both bowed their heads and left wordlessly.
“Finally, some rest.” Gwen got up and approached us, squatting down to press touch Jack’s ear. Her confused frown worried me. “Where’s your earpiece?” she finally asked.
“Hm. I don’t know, actually. I had it, and then I felt incredible pain and didn’t really focus on anything else. Sorry for losing it in my moment of pure agony,” came his sarcastic reply. “Anyway, untie us so we can get out of here.”
“I can’t.”
“What?” She touched the shackles we were bound with and maintained her frown.
“They’re some sort of weird alien metal.”
“Shoot it?”
“And if I take off both of your hands?” Jack laughed. “What’s so funny? I’d think it would be more tragic, not being able to go to Ianto and-”
“Hold it right there, Cooper. I don’t think it’s that big of a-”
“What if you miss and kill him?” I stammered suddenly. Gwen shot Jack a worried look, and he shook his head.
Jack turned his head to me and grinned. “Not a problem. Besides, I’m sure your ship would be happy to get rid of such a vile, disrespectful, and dirty creature such as myself.” I longed to reach out and take his face in my hands … but they were tied together. Damn it.
I settled on gently saying, “You could never be vile …” Jack rolled his eyes so I yelled at him. When someone blows me off like that, they deserve a sound lashing. “You’re the best person I’ve ever met. Your values really reflect what the world should be like, and I’m not saying that just because we had sex in the bathroom today. I’m saying that because it’s true.” Gwen turned a bright shade of red. “Sorry, Gwen, but this must be said. Second, disrespectful my arse. So you’re outgoing and self-confident; big fucking deal. People need to get over that.” I stopped talking, debating with myself whether to go into the accusation of Jack being ‘dirty.’
“You forgot one.”
“Do I really have to tell you how dirty you are?” I crinkled my nose jokingly and grinned. Jack laughed and shook his head.
“No, I guess you don’t.”
“I mean, if you wanted me to, I would.”
“You don’t have to, George.”
“No, I can, if you want me to.”
“George, you don’t have to!”
“Oh, come on, don’t be such a girl.”
“’Scuse me? Don’t insult women,” Gwen glared teasingly from her new seat behind the desk.
“What? Why not?”
“Because I can deplete your energy levels with a single command.”
“Oh, right,” Jack mocked, “Our sincerest apologies, Queen Tazh PhaHudev.”
“You’re forgiven.” Gwen smiled and looked between Jack and me. “How did you two meet?” I glanced at Jack and grinned.
“A bar.”
“How many years ago was that? I forget.” I couldn’t believe Jack had forgotten. What we’d had was so special … My grin swiftly fell into a frown, and I shifted my gaze to the floor.
“Over a decade.” I stared at the floor, tears of resentment flooding my eyes. I couldn’t bring myself to trouble him at a time like this, so I whispered, “Twelve years, three - hundred - and - forty days, and eighteen hours.”
“Are you alright, George?” Gwen murmured. I shook my head.
“Not at all.” I could see her frown in m peripheral vision; I wasn’t one to accept pity, and I wasn’t going to change that now. I ignored it determinedly. She got up and crossed the room to where I lay, placing a gentle hand on my back.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing anyone really worries about anymore. Must be time stored away in a bottle somewhere for them, but for me, I only have minutes. And the past twelve years, three - hundred - and - forty days, and eighteen hours have been Hell for me.” My head snapped to look at Jack. “I’ve missed you, but obviously all you care about now is your little Ianto. And all you need me for is a quick shag when it’s convenient for you. No one cares about past loves. But maybe, Jack, just maybe, you didn’t love me at all.”
“George, listen to me-” Jack began.
I interrupted with a snarl. “Captain Harkness, excuse my blunt response, but screw you. Forget about me. I’m not here. Forget who I am.” I turned my head, but decided to add something as an after thought.
“In fact, Captain … Forget I ever loved you.”
Author’s Note: Hey … Erm … Yowza, I know those Alien Names were toughies, weren’t they? Well, I decided to help you out for the upcoming chapter. These are my interpretations; do with them what you will.
Pronunciation Key and Background:
Ofaku Aghetho - Oh-Fahk-Oo Ah-Geth-Oh - the captain of Jack and George’s captors’ militia.
Phaaqyiap Moon - Fahk-yee-up Moon - George’s Captor. Reptilian. Brutal. More controlling over hostages.
Aphmiomchu Ensomoddos - Af-Me-Om-Chu En-som-oh-dos - Jack’s Captor. Also Reptilian. Brutal, but shier. Depends on fear of hostages to dominate, versus his partner who takes fear and replaces it with terror on his own whim.
Queen Tazh PhaHudev - Queen Tahz Fa-Hoo-Dev - Gwen Cooper. Only … not. New queen of homophobic tribe of Aliens.
If you feel like it, go ahead and try to guess who each part of this, minus Torchwood, represents in reality. Queen Tazh PhaHudev is included in this competition. Enclose guesses in comments :) I love comments.