(no subject)

[kat_smith]

im so angry
ultimatums are bullshit
people shouldn't pretend to care - at least be honest enough to not feign interest it just hurts more when you find out that you mean nothing to someone
putting others first just means getting hurt quicker
trying to please everyone never works
attempting to make friendships keep working even though people have changed often fails
which is sad and makes you wonder how close you were to begin with
i hate these moments that make you question the way you went about life and they way you think

so.. yeah,
amazed at how much people bitch about others behind their back. surprised too.
i guess i had it coming.
especially when you've never done anything to said person
and puts into question why the hell they wouldnt be up front with you and say something about it.
instead they make snide and rude remarks about you behind your back
and these are supposed to be my friends
how can i trust anyone
how can i believe that anyone is my friend, when there is always the possibility that they are saying things behind my back
how the fuck can people live like this

my throat aches.. weird

why do i even bother when i know i care more
why why why
why
why
why
why
why

why do i even bother?