Here I am
So it has been a while a long while since I have even looked at this silly journal. As far as my last post. Jay and I are trying to work things out, but you know that whole routine, you work things out for a while and things just end up being right where they were before. We have discussed my next step. If things get bad again I am going to get a little apartment for me and the girls and Jay and I seperating for a while. He is going to help me pay for rent but I will pay for the rest. It will be tough but we have to do something now. We have tryed other things maybe we just need to symbolicly try starting over by slowing down and dating again. I know we can never truely start over, there is to much water under the bridge. HE WAS A DICK IN THE BEGINNING and all these years later as petty and inmature as it sounds I am having trouble letting go of some things. I DO NOT LIKE BEING FUCKED WITH. I don't like when other people make me question myself and who I am. I have traveled a very long hard road I need my strength. Well, I have to take my mother to the doctor and then head off to work. Check back when I can I hope all is well.