VIGNETTE: Life Felt Pretty Messy
Date: Day 7, Month 4, Turn 19
Location: Diving Cliff, High Reaches Weyr
Synopsis: After Tiriana leaves, K'del mopes over the state of everything.
Added synopsis, courtesy of Satiet: K'del kicks stones all the way up to diving cliff. Not scared usually. Lost his balls today. Meant to be nice to Tiriana, but Tiriana grates him. Damn Tiriana. Damn those attractive boobs. What if Tiriana becomes WW? OMG. Crap. >> I'm sorry. << / << Damn right you better be. I like Iovniath. >> / >> Home? << / << Ok. >>
After Tiriana left, K'del turned around and walked back over the land bridge, and then, up the slippery stairs to the diving cliff. The wind was cold, and he was damp through and getting steadily colder, but he wasn't quite ready to go back in.
He sat down on the edge, legs crossed, trying not to think too much about how far down the drop was, how cold the water would be if he slipped and fell. He wasn't really scared of this drop, any more, not usually, but for some reason, today, it was freaking him out. He stared at his shoes, instead, his muddy trouser legs.
He'd said the wrong thing again. He'd been trying, really trying, for a while there, and then he'd gone and said something so stupid that even Cadejoth didn't want to speak to him right now - he was a disapproving presence, constantly at the back of K'del's mind, but he wouldn't say anything.
K'del knew full well that Cadejoth hated the antagonism, hated the way he and Tiriana always sniped. And it wasn't like K'del didn't have good intentions (sometimes), but there was always something to set him off, piss him off. Ideally, he would've liked to be above all of that, to be able to laugh at her, but not get hurt in return. Logically, he knew it would never happen. But. But!
He lifted his head, staring out over the grey water, the weyr beyond. Life felt pretty messy, right now. Even before this whole... thing, today, with Tiriana, he'd been moping about things. A'son was back. He'd heard that pretty quickly, though he'd yet to meet the man. He wondered whether that meant the end to his... thing, with Milani, whatever she'd said at turnover.
It wasn't that he'd avoided her, these past couple of days, so much as not gone out of his way to see her. Which had worked, all things considered. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer, nevermind what he always said about wanting her to be happy; ultimately, he'd never really believed there was any chance of it happening. Until now. And the trouble was, he liked being with her. He'd miss it, if it were over.
It didn't mean he didn't want her to be happy. But. But...
Thinking about Milani drew his thoughts back to Tiriana again, and to Satiet, the link, today at least, between the two. Was Satiet really dying? If she was, chances were Tiriana'd be Weyrwoman after her - isn't that what he'd thrown in her face, minutes before? - and that thought still scared him. But... the dying, too. He'd not had a lot of experience with people dying, at least, not young people. Young-ish. His grandparents, sure, both sets of them. But this was different; they'd been old, and Satiet... wasn't.
He hoped people were wrong on that score. That it was a passing phase, and everything would go back to normal. Soon. Please, soon. Please.
I'm sorry, Cadejoth. I didn't mean to upset you. Or them.
<< I wish you wouldn't do it so often, K'del. I wish... I like Iovniath. Why can't you like her rider? >>
She drives me crazy. She's... It doesn't matter. I shouldn't let her rile me. I shouldn't say the wrong thing.
<< You can try harder. >>
I will. I promise.
<< Good. Can we go home, now? >>
Of course.
Location: Diving Cliff, High Reaches Weyr
Synopsis: After Tiriana leaves, K'del mopes over the state of everything.
Added synopsis, courtesy of Satiet: K'del kicks stones all the way up to diving cliff. Not scared usually. Lost his balls today. Meant to be nice to Tiriana, but Tiriana grates him. Damn Tiriana. Damn those attractive boobs. What if Tiriana becomes WW? OMG. Crap. >> I'm sorry. << / << Damn right you better be. I like Iovniath. >> / >> Home? << / << Ok. >>
After Tiriana left, K'del turned around and walked back over the land bridge, and then, up the slippery stairs to the diving cliff. The wind was cold, and he was damp through and getting steadily colder, but he wasn't quite ready to go back in.
He sat down on the edge, legs crossed, trying not to think too much about how far down the drop was, how cold the water would be if he slipped and fell. He wasn't really scared of this drop, any more, not usually, but for some reason, today, it was freaking him out. He stared at his shoes, instead, his muddy trouser legs.
He'd said the wrong thing again. He'd been trying, really trying, for a while there, and then he'd gone and said something so stupid that even Cadejoth didn't want to speak to him right now - he was a disapproving presence, constantly at the back of K'del's mind, but he wouldn't say anything.
K'del knew full well that Cadejoth hated the antagonism, hated the way he and Tiriana always sniped. And it wasn't like K'del didn't have good intentions (sometimes), but there was always something to set him off, piss him off. Ideally, he would've liked to be above all of that, to be able to laugh at her, but not get hurt in return. Logically, he knew it would never happen. But. But!
He lifted his head, staring out over the grey water, the weyr beyond. Life felt pretty messy, right now. Even before this whole... thing, today, with Tiriana, he'd been moping about things. A'son was back. He'd heard that pretty quickly, though he'd yet to meet the man. He wondered whether that meant the end to his... thing, with Milani, whatever she'd said at turnover.
It wasn't that he'd avoided her, these past couple of days, so much as not gone out of his way to see her. Which had worked, all things considered. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer, nevermind what he always said about wanting her to be happy; ultimately, he'd never really believed there was any chance of it happening. Until now. And the trouble was, he liked being with her. He'd miss it, if it were over.
It didn't mean he didn't want her to be happy. But. But...
Thinking about Milani drew his thoughts back to Tiriana again, and to Satiet, the link, today at least, between the two. Was Satiet really dying? If she was, chances were Tiriana'd be Weyrwoman after her - isn't that what he'd thrown in her face, minutes before? - and that thought still scared him. But... the dying, too. He'd not had a lot of experience with people dying, at least, not young people. Young-ish. His grandparents, sure, both sets of them. But this was different; they'd been old, and Satiet... wasn't.
He hoped people were wrong on that score. That it was a passing phase, and everything would go back to normal. Soon. Please, soon. Please.
I'm sorry, Cadejoth. I didn't mean to upset you. Or them.
<< I wish you wouldn't do it so often, K'del. I wish... I like Iovniath. Why can't you like her rider? >>
She drives me crazy. She's... It doesn't matter. I shouldn't let her rile me. I shouldn't say the wrong thing.
<< You can try harder. >>
I will. I promise.
<< Good. Can we go home, now? >>
Of course.