Home Sweet Home?
So Sunday was a very trying day. I ended up doing something I am very proud of and others that I could kick myself for doing, and regreting something and being happy about others. Sunday absoutly EVERYONE of my friends had left to have at fun 4th, while I was still sitting at the townhouse, misserable. I am here at Twin Oaks finishing up my days work, which has been fun but one thing I have learned over the summer is that I have not ever really let my hair down and had fun. All my friends have all kinds of stories where they when and had all kinds of fun, and I am like YEAH well I um worked my ass off ... so there. I am still glad that I dedicated my life to becoming what I want to be, but I have also missed a lot of fun with people. I mean really other than "my party" the other Friday I have never even been to a real party. I have never really had a "birthday party" and I have never went camping or to the beach with all my friends and just let loose. I now realize that I probably never will. I know that being the "goodie goodie" can have its benifits but honestly I believe that I could have had the same results with more fun and less stress. I do however blame a lot of this on my parents, I do wish that even now they would cut the leash, but oh well enough of my rant. I feel like I have so much to do and that I am never going to be where I want to be as far as applying to vet school. I just want to skip this year and go streight to next year and be doing whatever God has planned for me. I have known this song for a while but I heard it again the other day and realized how true it held for me, its about a guy who keeps wishing with all his heart for certain things to happen and they always seem to happen to his friends and everyone that he knows except him, its call wishing on someone else's star by Brian White. I know exactly how that guy feels, its like I say man it would be really nice if THIS happened and like the next day one of my friends or aquatiences comes up and is like guess what just happened and I guess what I just wished for and they are like yeah how did you guess and I am like oh just a hunch. I dont know ... its just fustrating that if something goes right in my life its like a tragic mistake and is quickly reworked til where I am back with my old boring, dull, worthless, good-for-nothing, unlucky, unsucessful life. Well anyways its all over now ... I cant wait til August and its my birthday because I really really could use a drink right now. Well I guess I have nothing else to rant about ... Hope everyone is having an awesome 4th ... or at least a better one than I.