I think I'm Numb
I've been home for a little while. i haven't wondered into any of the rooms unless i've had too. ever since the burial i've only cried a few times. it bothers me to no end that i feel so numb most of the time. i know this will hit me later on if not when i lay down. I have never felt this much pain or loss before. i worry about myself a lot. Kittie's mom called to check on me. i think she's more worried about me than herself. she's strong, i see where Kittie got it from. she told me to take care of myself ,to stay in touch, and that she loved me. i think the whole family adopted me. without my friends i'd lose it . i know i can't handle this. i feel so lost and without direction. so now for my first steps alone, with tears in my eyes and a hole in my heart. everything will mend in time. it's just making it through this in the time being that bothers me.