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so here i am 2 days later after posting a LJ.
I am now 24...wooo freakin hoo. i did not make it a national holiday because i am very depressed.
eric did take me to dinner however to pf changs, which was nice.
got tons of texts and facebook and myspace comments.
today is wednesday...woo fricking hoo. i am off tomorrow. getting a massage (i think) and a pedi and mani but not to definate yet. and i am def getting an oil change i am two months late...which is usually the normal for me lol.
this whole single thing = pretty lame. i just realize in my blog i wrote " i am not single which i am assuming it should have been i am now single" lol.
you don't tell someone after 3 years i don't see a future with you. to me its bull sh*t...and i know it is. to grow thru so much with some person, and to putt effort and time into each other you can't give up that easily. and he's not seeing anyone else i know that for a fact. i just don't understand why he is so stupid. i am an awesome person, i am fun, easy going, i laugh and almost everything, like why would a guy not want to be with me...helllo no many girls are down to go to strip clubs and everything else. me i am game for all. i love to have fun and i am open minded. n e ways don't want to get to in depth...tomorrow will be 1 week of fully no crying about eric. the last month i have been extremely depressed and sad...ugh hate it... never felt a heart break like this, thats for sure.
i sit here and tell myself, lord help the next guy i date. he won't meet the family for a long long time. he will meet my friends after about 2 years/ i hate when people get attached. my pop pop asked me today how my 'friend" was doing and i said what friend pops he said you know your boyfriend. i said grammy didnt tell you he broke my heart last month. he said oh shucks just got find yourself another one. my godmother and i talked about eric today, she was very sad to hear i am heart broken. hell everyone is sad, i am so miserable its crazy. like seriously may 20th to june 20th i went over my 900 minutes. june 20th to july 20th i use like 300 minutes, but i guess thats because i have been avoiding people and pushing people away and being miserable and sitting on my couch eating ice cream and crying. i have never been so disappointed in my life with someone...
i am def taking a break for awhile with this whole dating thing. i dont even know if i want to put time and effort and everything else into a new relationship...it feels like so much work and i don't want to work for it anymore. i am sick of always being the one that is disappointed. i said to my friend jenna today, god i wish i was 10- 13 again when i did not care, i had like a millon boyfriends, i would break up with them and yadda yadda...and ive always been boy crazy ever since i came out of the womb...but now that i am 24 and ready to settle down and move out and progress, i feel like ugh i have to start all over again and i dont want to do that. i have such a huge heart and i really dont judge people ( i do judge but u know lol i have gotten better)
i remember when i hate chico for breaking my heart back in 2004. he is one of my best guy friends i know. he currently is in jail for something truly sad...and i have been there for him. its good to know he is there for me. i wish he was home so i could talk to him at anytime, but its okay thank lord for pen and paper and/or microsoft word.
i applied for a government position today at woodlawn...crossing my fingers for something good. i am ready to go on a new adventure and get out of baltimore county savings bank...mama needs to make more money and mama needs to work with some hot guys lol.
this weekend shan & kev are having a summer bash...should be fun...i am actually going to consume alcohol...but i probably won't get wasted.
following weekend is some mutal friends of eric and i they have a summer bash/ birthday party, and i know he wasnt invited so i am going and then i am going to see kenny chennsey(sp) the end of august that should be fun.
Todays is Greg Deweys 23rd birthday... I have been thinking about dewey for a couple of weeks now. and i can't believe a year comes on sunday that he has not been with us. i don't know whats worst losing a family member or losing a friend. his viewing was way way emotional and heart breaking. r.i.p dewey miss you man.
i made me appointment today for surgery at the endonotist(close enough lol) for august 18th so i am just going to take off the whole day cause WE ALL KNOW I HATE THE DENTIST AFTER THAT ONE INCIDENT...EKK...plus i am really weird about who looks around in my mouth and messes with the grill...but since i cant have my childhood dentist i had to go to this one, which is not so bad. but lord i wish they could put me to sleep and do everything all at once lol. but after i get this tooth done the dentist won't be pissed at me anymore cause when i went in june he said how old are you i said "24" he said you really need to get this done and threw down the dental tools and walked out. CAN WE SAY YEA HE DEF WAS ANGRY LOL SO IF I atleast get tooth num. 30 done he will be happy. and hopefully in september before i go away to nashville i can get my front tooth done...and lord knows once that happens i will probably smile more ridicolous then i do now lol. then eventually the wisdom teeth will get done..maybe in nov or early january at the latest. i want to make sure mr dentist man is happy next time i see him lol.
Tiffany had her baby today and I am glad she had the baby on Dewey's Birthday. Her baby boy who i believe she named Dylan was 7pds and 3 ounces and he came at 2:34pm. sooo exciting! tabitha is due august 8th and kristin is due august 12th...then all done baby stuff till feb 11th lol. babies are popping out everyone....not from my va-jay jay though...its been a longggg two months of no action..and i aint got no baby daddy either...but whatever...
i am going to invest in a wavvy long wig to wear out when i go out to be fabolous... :) i think it would be neat. just can't get my hair caught on anything or get into a fight lol.
anyways enough blogging for now.
to0dles to0ts.
I am now 24...wooo freakin hoo. i did not make it a national holiday because i am very depressed.
eric did take me to dinner however to pf changs, which was nice.
got tons of texts and facebook and myspace comments.
today is wednesday...woo fricking hoo. i am off tomorrow. getting a massage (i think) and a pedi and mani but not to definate yet. and i am def getting an oil change i am two months late...which is usually the normal for me lol.
this whole single thing = pretty lame. i just realize in my blog i wrote " i am not single which i am assuming it should have been i am now single" lol.
you don't tell someone after 3 years i don't see a future with you. to me its bull sh*t...and i know it is. to grow thru so much with some person, and to putt effort and time into each other you can't give up that easily. and he's not seeing anyone else i know that for a fact. i just don't understand why he is so stupid. i am an awesome person, i am fun, easy going, i laugh and almost everything, like why would a guy not want to be with me...helllo no many girls are down to go to strip clubs and everything else. me i am game for all. i love to have fun and i am open minded. n e ways don't want to get to in depth...tomorrow will be 1 week of fully no crying about eric. the last month i have been extremely depressed and sad...ugh hate it... never felt a heart break like this, thats for sure.
i sit here and tell myself, lord help the next guy i date. he won't meet the family for a long long time. he will meet my friends after about 2 years/ i hate when people get attached. my pop pop asked me today how my 'friend" was doing and i said what friend pops he said you know your boyfriend. i said grammy didnt tell you he broke my heart last month. he said oh shucks just got find yourself another one. my godmother and i talked about eric today, she was very sad to hear i am heart broken. hell everyone is sad, i am so miserable its crazy. like seriously may 20th to june 20th i went over my 900 minutes. june 20th to july 20th i use like 300 minutes, but i guess thats because i have been avoiding people and pushing people away and being miserable and sitting on my couch eating ice cream and crying. i have never been so disappointed in my life with someone...
i am def taking a break for awhile with this whole dating thing. i dont even know if i want to put time and effort and everything else into a new relationship...it feels like so much work and i don't want to work for it anymore. i am sick of always being the one that is disappointed. i said to my friend jenna today, god i wish i was 10- 13 again when i did not care, i had like a millon boyfriends, i would break up with them and yadda yadda...and ive always been boy crazy ever since i came out of the womb...but now that i am 24 and ready to settle down and move out and progress, i feel like ugh i have to start all over again and i dont want to do that. i have such a huge heart and i really dont judge people ( i do judge but u know lol i have gotten better)
i remember when i hate chico for breaking my heart back in 2004. he is one of my best guy friends i know. he currently is in jail for something truly sad...and i have been there for him. its good to know he is there for me. i wish he was home so i could talk to him at anytime, but its okay thank lord for pen and paper and/or microsoft word.
i applied for a government position today at woodlawn...crossing my fingers for something good. i am ready to go on a new adventure and get out of baltimore county savings bank...mama needs to make more money and mama needs to work with some hot guys lol.
this weekend shan & kev are having a summer bash...should be fun...i am actually going to consume alcohol...but i probably won't get wasted.
following weekend is some mutal friends of eric and i they have a summer bash/ birthday party, and i know he wasnt invited so i am going and then i am going to see kenny chennsey(sp) the end of august that should be fun.
Todays is Greg Deweys 23rd birthday... I have been thinking about dewey for a couple of weeks now. and i can't believe a year comes on sunday that he has not been with us. i don't know whats worst losing a family member or losing a friend. his viewing was way way emotional and heart breaking. r.i.p dewey miss you man.
i made me appointment today for surgery at the endonotist(close enough lol) for august 18th so i am just going to take off the whole day cause WE ALL KNOW I HATE THE DENTIST AFTER THAT ONE INCIDENT...EKK...plus i am really weird about who looks around in my mouth and messes with the grill...but since i cant have my childhood dentist i had to go to this one, which is not so bad. but lord i wish they could put me to sleep and do everything all at once lol. but after i get this tooth done the dentist won't be pissed at me anymore cause when i went in june he said how old are you i said "24" he said you really need to get this done and threw down the dental tools and walked out. CAN WE SAY YEA HE DEF WAS ANGRY LOL SO IF I atleast get tooth num. 30 done he will be happy. and hopefully in september before i go away to nashville i can get my front tooth done...and lord knows once that happens i will probably smile more ridicolous then i do now lol. then eventually the wisdom teeth will get done..maybe in nov or early january at the latest. i want to make sure mr dentist man is happy next time i see him lol.
Tiffany had her baby today and I am glad she had the baby on Dewey's Birthday. Her baby boy who i believe she named Dylan was 7pds and 3 ounces and he came at 2:34pm. sooo exciting! tabitha is due august 8th and kristin is due august 12th...then all done baby stuff till feb 11th lol. babies are popping out everyone....not from my va-jay jay though...its been a longggg two months of no action..and i aint got no baby daddy either...but whatever...
i am going to invest in a wavvy long wig to wear out when i go out to be fabolous... :) i think it would be neat. just can't get my hair caught on anything or get into a fight lol.
anyways enough blogging for now.
to0dles to0ts.