(no subject)
Texas has been great.
But it's times like right now, that I'm incredibly pensive and I can't help but ask myself, "What the heck am I doing?"
Tonight and right now is just a mood, it will kick out...I hope. But I can't help but feeling the way I do right now. I want to not feel like I'm making a mistake, because I know in my heart of hearts that I'm not. I am doing God's will for my life and I am sure of it. I have to listen to my mom over the phone...I can't see her, and look at her funny faces when she's being silly in the morning. I can't see my cat anymore...he was MINE. He still sleeps in my bed, waiting for me to come home.
I talk to my best friend everyday, and she's sad too that I'm gone. I guess it's not a win win situation.
And the fakeness of some of these girls is already getting to me. I should have never auditioned for ensemble. I shouldn't have played the piano for Devon, I shouldn't have. Maybe then people wouldn't think that I think that I'm the shiz. I promise, I'm not conceited about it. Maybe that's how I DO come off and I don't realize it. I'm so quiet, people can't help but think that's what's going on.
I'm not being myself. I'm being boring. Well, as of recently. I've been good, and strangely, happy a little -- I have a new guy around, and he's really awesome. Already...ha, oops.
I don't know. Just right now, I'm really discouraged. I don't feel like being social. What I wanna do...is go home, hug my cat soooooooo much and pet him like there's no tomorrow and let him know how much he means to me. Then call my best friend and tell her to get her butt over here, and we would hang out like we do. Then my mom would come home and make us all chili. FLORIDA chili as she likes to call it.
Life is never gonne be the same =/
Ahhhhhhhhh, I'm SO emo right nowww...:(
But it's times like right now, that I'm incredibly pensive and I can't help but ask myself, "What the heck am I doing?"
Tonight and right now is just a mood, it will kick out...I hope. But I can't help but feeling the way I do right now. I want to not feel like I'm making a mistake, because I know in my heart of hearts that I'm not. I am doing God's will for my life and I am sure of it. I have to listen to my mom over the phone...I can't see her, and look at her funny faces when she's being silly in the morning. I can't see my cat anymore...he was MINE. He still sleeps in my bed, waiting for me to come home.
I talk to my best friend everyday, and she's sad too that I'm gone. I guess it's not a win win situation.
And the fakeness of some of these girls is already getting to me. I should have never auditioned for ensemble. I shouldn't have played the piano for Devon, I shouldn't have. Maybe then people wouldn't think that I think that I'm the shiz. I promise, I'm not conceited about it. Maybe that's how I DO come off and I don't realize it. I'm so quiet, people can't help but think that's what's going on.
I'm not being myself. I'm being boring. Well, as of recently. I've been good, and strangely, happy a little -- I have a new guy around, and he's really awesome. Already...ha, oops.
I don't know. Just right now, I'm really discouraged. I don't feel like being social. What I wanna do...is go home, hug my cat soooooooo much and pet him like there's no tomorrow and let him know how much he means to me. Then call my best friend and tell her to get her butt over here, and we would hang out like we do. Then my mom would come home and make us all chili. FLORIDA chili as she likes to call it.
Life is never gonne be the same =/
Ahhhhhhhhh, I'm SO emo right nowww...:(