Now Is the Winter of My Discontent!
I want to be a robber-baron. I enjoy suits with vests, and cigars, and laughing at other's misfortune. I've always found something almost mystically appealing about trains. I've never gotten too terribly into port and sherry, but I'm willing to make the effort. I can chortle like nobody's business. I think I'd make an excellent robber-baron.
I want to be a bloody-handed dictator. I enjoy obsidian monoliths, and lakes of blood, and the endless, wailing chorus of my enemies suffering. I'd look good in a khaki jumpsuit with too many pockets, though it's the beret that makes it. I could find a complete disregard for decency and life. I'd only make an OK bloody-handed dictator though, mostly because I find mass graves to be uncreative.
I want to be a superhero. I'd like some ridiculous, unexplainable power. Maybe a mysterious past. Plus, there'd be hot bitches in Spandex all over the place. I'd get to run around blowing shit up with other people like me, and the government would have to pay for the collateral damage, because face it, the Army can't stop Dr. Destructo and his legion of robots without using nukes. I'd be a pretty fair-to-middlin' superhero.
I want to be a living saint. Like, canonized and shit. People around the world would pretty much have to listen to me when I talked about religion. Plus, I would be able to do miracles, that's a prerequisite of being sainted. I could talk to the Pope whenever I wanted, maybe even borrow the Popemobile, tool around Europe giving the good word and blessing things. I'm just guessing on this, but I bet the Church would give me a really fancy hat. I'd be a really bitchin' living saint.
I want to be a paleontologist. Nothing funny here, I just always wanted to be an paleontologist.
I want to be an old-timey auctioneer. I'd get to yell unintelligibly at strangers all day without it being creepy. I could talk as fast as I wanted, and I could just make words up. Who would know? I could wear as much flannel as I could fit on my person, and a magnificent 'stache just goes with the territory. I'd get people to spend more than they should on things they only kinda want. I find that poignant. I would rock as an old-timey auctioneer.
I want to be a bloody-handed dictator. I enjoy obsidian monoliths, and lakes of blood, and the endless, wailing chorus of my enemies suffering. I'd look good in a khaki jumpsuit with too many pockets, though it's the beret that makes it. I could find a complete disregard for decency and life. I'd only make an OK bloody-handed dictator though, mostly because I find mass graves to be uncreative.
I want to be a superhero. I'd like some ridiculous, unexplainable power. Maybe a mysterious past. Plus, there'd be hot bitches in Spandex all over the place. I'd get to run around blowing shit up with other people like me, and the government would have to pay for the collateral damage, because face it, the Army can't stop Dr. Destructo and his legion of robots without using nukes. I'd be a pretty fair-to-middlin' superhero.
I want to be a living saint. Like, canonized and shit. People around the world would pretty much have to listen to me when I talked about religion. Plus, I would be able to do miracles, that's a prerequisite of being sainted. I could talk to the Pope whenever I wanted, maybe even borrow the Popemobile, tool around Europe giving the good word and blessing things. I'm just guessing on this, but I bet the Church would give me a really fancy hat. I'd be a really bitchin' living saint.
I want to be a paleontologist. Nothing funny here, I just always wanted to be an paleontologist.
I want to be an old-timey auctioneer. I'd get to yell unintelligibly at strangers all day without it being creepy. I could talk as fast as I wanted, and I could just make words up. Who would know? I could wear as much flannel as I could fit on my person, and a magnificent 'stache just goes with the territory. I'd get people to spend more than they should on things they only kinda want. I find that poignant. I would rock as an old-timey auctioneer.