Comments | kappamaki33: Fic: Monster

kappamaki33

Fic: Monster

Apr 22, 2010 21:05

Title: Monster
Author: kappamaki33
Characters: Hoshi, Cain, Gina, Gaeta, 2 OCs
Pairing: Gaeta/Hoshi, Cain/Gina
Summary: I’m mean.
Rating: Definitely R.
Warnings! Violence, torture, talk of and aftermath of rape
Notes: For geekbynight’s prompt, Felix is the Pegasus Cylon prisoner. I mean, that’s bound to get dark, but yikes. I feel like I need a nightlight. Not ( Read more... )

Comments 18

daybreak777 April 23 2010, 02:31:50 UTC

Line was too long for her.
Oh, my god. Gina is my favorite Six and Felix my favorite male character on BSG. :-(

Wow, this was brutal. When you are hoping that Hoshi kills Felix, when that actually seems merciful? Whoa.

I might have more to say later. I'm still at 'whoa' right now.

kappamaki33 April 23 2010, 15:30:19 UTC

I know--definitely as dark as I've ever gone before. I like how the "Never will I ever" meme generates so many ideas that I frankly wouldn't have the guts to come up with completely on my own.

Wow, this was brutal. When you are hoping that Hoshi kills Felix, when that actually seems merciful? Whoa.

I know. I almost wanted to let him do it, to go for the happier (yikes) ending.

Thanks for reading, even though it got so pitch black.

safenthecity April 23 2010, 02:43:19 UTC

Oh my god, that was intense. I don't know where to begin. There is so much anger and pain here, and it's hard to read, but at the same time, it makes sense.

Somehow it's worse when it's Louis than when it's Cain. I think it's because Cain (at least outwordly) so firmly established that Gina was a thing, where Louis was still thinking of him as Felix. That makes it so much more terrible.

Man. This left me a bit shaky. And I can't help but wonder- did this Felix know? Was he in on it the whole time? And the fact that I don't know just adds to the effect.

This was painful, and awful, and well-written.

kappamaki33 April 23 2010, 15:34:26 UTC

Thanks. Yeah, it's definitely worse with Louis. With Cain, it feels like she can just turn off the guilty and conflicted parts of herself, a la "Razor." But Louis doesn't.

All I can say is I really, really hope this Felix did know what he was, even though that only makes things marginally less painful. I know when I was writing, I was thinking he was aware like Gina, but I still couldn't help but think, "But he's Felix! Cavil must have tricked him into genocide or something!" It's just so hard to think of the Felix we know and love as a cover layered on top of some "real," bloodthirsty Felix, you know?

Thanks for reading!

safenthecity April 26 2010, 03:39:54 UTC

So... I may have been thinking about this entirely too much, and it's... possible that I have written part of a short Felix POV prequel (when I really should have been writing a proper essay). It's mostly for myself, but since it's completely inspired by this story, I was contemplating sharing it with you, if you don't mind me playing in your sandbox?

kappamaki33 April 26 2010, 17:03:53 UTC

Please, share it with everybody, if you like! I'm curious to see it. But yeah, go ahead and play in this sandbox as much as you like!

puszysty April 23 2010, 03:31:12 UTC

Oh my. Dark indeed. I feel like Hoshi is going to suffer more than Cain at this point, because he feels that guilt.

kappamaki33 April 23 2010, 15:35:29 UTC

Oh, he'd definitely hurt more. ::Pets Hoshi and promises to give him a break from unrelenting darkness in the lgbtfest fic::

lorrainemarker April 23 2010, 03:49:00 UTC

Oh, this is incredibly painful. I like the structure with Hoshi knowing what was happening to Felix before he went in, then seeing the consequences. The mirrors images of Hoshi & Cain and how each seems to handle the discovery that their lover is a Cylon is painfully interesting. I like the way this story points out the incongruence that while the entire point of the torture and rape was to hurt, that the crew probably wouldn't have been able to do it if they really thought of Gina and Felix as 'people' with the same capacity for pain that they have. It really brings to the fore the difference between Galactica and Pegasus.

kappamaki33 April 23 2010, 15:42:17 UTC

the incongruence that while the entire point of the torture and rape was to hurt, that the crew probably wouldn't have been able to do it if they really thought of Gina and Felix as 'people' with the same capacity for pain that they have.

Yes! This is exactly what I was going for, and what fascinated me enough to take the prompt in this direction. I think the people who could cleanly embrace that disconnect and doublethink, plus the ones like Rimes (and Gage and Vireem) who were just too simple to see the tension, were the ones who could sleep at night on the Pegasus. The ones like Hoshi, who tried to reconcile the two irreconcilable ideas behind the torture, nearly drove themselves mad with guilty and shame and anger.

Thanks so much for reading!

lorrainemarker April 23 2010, 20:53:31 UTC

Actually, this story reminds me that I really need to write my meta on cognitive dissonance as a theme in Battlestar Galactica. Between Helo, Baltar, Cain, the Cylon rebellion, & Pegasus they gave me so much to work with.

(The comment has been removed)

kappamaki33 April 23 2010, 15:44:56 UTC

Yeah, I kinda thought you liked dark fic, so I'm happy you like dark but mostly alluding to the really bad stuff. On one hand, I knew I couldn't write anything more explicit without making myself sick. On the other, you're right; the imagination does so much more with a few sharp little details and leaving the rest open than I ever could have done with description.

Thanks so much for reading and prompting, and I'm glad you found it interesting!