Dali
i don't even know what i'm thinking
my laptop is keeping me warm... it's so cold in here
actually, i don't know if it's actually cold or i'm just shaking.......
i think it might be a little bit of both...
i've had too much time to think lately
way tooooooo much
thinking is not good for me...
not right now...
why am i trying to avoid it though???
"we all have the answers to our questions" my brother told me once....
and... y e s... we do
in this case
i guess i'm just running away from my own answers
WHAT THE FUCK AM I SO AFRAID OF!?!?!?!?!
NOT LIFE
NOT LOVE
NOT ANYTHING...
but i am....
i don't know what it is.....
and yes, it's killing me inside
it's draining me.... once again....
AND i DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM IS!!!!!!!!!! all i know is i just want to get out.... stop it... stop it... stop it... STOP IT
it's driving insane
i'm not ratioanly thinking...
all my actions are very impulsive
i can't control myself
i feel as if i've lost me
as if i gave me away
you would think i'd learn from my past mistakes....
you would think once i stuck my hand in the fire and burnt it all up... i would not do it again...
you would think i'm smarter than that.....
and yes... my brain is telling me not to... and it was telling me all along not to...
but...
like always...
i went with what my r e t a r d e d lil heart told me to do...
there's no logic in it's thinking...
there is not....
there's not past
no future
just now
indulging itself in the present... not thinking
time composed of only emotions....momeries... images.
time standing still....
t i m e
In art history class... you always hear about the life of the great artists... VanGogh, Munch, and Dali are a few who have really gotten to me
misunderstood, sometimes dark, genius
but all
suffered in silence
we all know van gogh's story
gosh... no wonder such life ended in suicide
Munch... left with emptyness by friends and women...
and Dali...
oh Dali.......
oh Dali's biggest inspiration and passion, Gala
from a gay "childhood"
Dali fell in love with the most beautiful woman to him, Gala
and she...
she would go out with other men...
and Dali knew about it
but his love for her was so big
he would kiss the floor she walked on
and he, he did not care...
Dali...
and they lived their lives the way they wanted
and they left our world
but they left a print
and those
those, thanks to art history.... are the lives we know about....
the suffering portrayed on canvas
envigorating brush strokes--- "starry night"
dark deep sorrow---- munch's self portraits
and the surrealistic genius found in Dali's paintigs.....
my laptop is keeping me warm... it's so cold in here
actually, i don't know if it's actually cold or i'm just shaking.......
i think it might be a little bit of both...
i've had too much time to think lately
way tooooooo much
thinking is not good for me...
not right now...
why am i trying to avoid it though???
"we all have the answers to our questions" my brother told me once....
and... y e s... we do
in this case
i guess i'm just running away from my own answers
WHAT THE FUCK AM I SO AFRAID OF!?!?!?!?!
NOT LIFE
NOT LOVE
NOT ANYTHING...
but i am....
i don't know what it is.....
and yes, it's killing me inside
it's draining me.... once again....
AND i DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROBLEM IS!!!!!!!!!! all i know is i just want to get out.... stop it... stop it... stop it... STOP IT
it's driving insane
i'm not ratioanly thinking...
all my actions are very impulsive
i can't control myself
i feel as if i've lost me
as if i gave me away
you would think i'd learn from my past mistakes....
you would think once i stuck my hand in the fire and burnt it all up... i would not do it again...
you would think i'm smarter than that.....
and yes... my brain is telling me not to... and it was telling me all along not to...
but...
like always...
i went with what my r e t a r d e d lil heart told me to do...
there's no logic in it's thinking...
there is not....
there's not past
no future
just now
indulging itself in the present... not thinking
time composed of only emotions....momeries... images.
time standing still....
t i m e
In art history class... you always hear about the life of the great artists... VanGogh, Munch, and Dali are a few who have really gotten to me
misunderstood, sometimes dark, genius
but all
suffered in silence
we all know van gogh's story
gosh... no wonder such life ended in suicide
Munch... left with emptyness by friends and women...
and Dali...
oh Dali.......
oh Dali's biggest inspiration and passion, Gala
from a gay "childhood"
Dali fell in love with the most beautiful woman to him, Gala
and she...
she would go out with other men...
and Dali knew about it
but his love for her was so big
he would kiss the floor she walked on
and he, he did not care...
Dali...
and they lived their lives the way they wanted
and they left our world
but they left a print
and those
those, thanks to art history.... are the lives we know about....
the suffering portrayed on canvas
envigorating brush strokes--- "starry night"
dark deep sorrow---- munch's self portraits
and the surrealistic genius found in Dali's paintigs.....