[Video | Private]pinktintedgamonAugust 28 2011, 16:46:29 UTC
Ah...well he was only here for a short time, honestly. Abarai-san, Kuchiki-san, and Ukitake-san were the ones that were here the longest.
[He pauses then, and finally cuts his own gaze up to eye the man at the other end of the Hitomi, then finally sighs. Because this can't have been an easy transition from a place like that to here. Not at all.
And Kira seems nice - soft-spoken, easily flustered, and sincere - which is why Raikou finally comes to a decision and flicks the Hitomi over to private. More out of respect for Kira's already abused privacy than a need to protect the appearance of his own actions.]
Kira-san.
If you need to talk about that place, or the sentiments behind this dream, it's alright. I'm not offended - to the contrary, I'm quite flattered and no small measure of tempted in a certain way, but this type of lifestyle, the one in both of our dreams, has an underlying truth and the demand to fulfill a need. So if you need help understanding that, then it's alright.
[A beat, before he finishes softly:] I may not be in a place in my life where I can act upon those sentiments, but I can help you better understand them.
[Video | Private]gilded_despairAugust 30 2011, 06:04:38 UTC
[Kira can’t help smiling ever so faintly. Renji must’ve been so frustrated with the persistent “Abarai-san” from Raikou. It was a shame the redhead was no longer here… but then of course Renji would’ve seen this dream and… he didn’t want to think about his friend’s reaction to something like this.
Thankfully the other man spoke again before he could let his mind get too carried away with that thought. And he was instead left staring guiltily at that that offer. Not in a place where I can act upon those sentiments. Which meant however stressed and uncertain Gau had been on Atollo they were able to work through it and end up together and happy which was precisely what his friends deserved.
He shouldn’t, he knew that… Raikou had said enough for him to know that whatever curiosity he’d had on that island was no less applicable here which meant such conversations would be… not in his friends’ best interests. So after a long contemplative moment he forces a small smile.]
While I appreciate the offer… [He tries his best not to look like he’s worried or concerned about any of it and that in and of itself is a tell though whether this Raikou will realize that is another question. It bothers him… this glimpse into what Raikou calls a lifestyle that he got at the Oasis and knowing that what he’d had with Gin had been something beyond that, something more twisted and infinitely more painful and damaging than he’d realized at first. ]
It’s fine, Shimizu-san… I… I wouldn’t want to impose. You and Meguro-san are happier here and… I wouldn’t want to do anything that might endanger that in any way. So perhaps it’s best if we… don’t discuss these topics.
[Video | Private]pinktintedgamonSeptember 1 2011, 11:29:36 UTC
[Now that just earns Kira a bright laugh - because it's kind and considerate, two traits he's beginning to associate as accurate with this man, but not really needed. In many ways, at least to Raikou's mind, Kira is basing the denial not on the Raikou and Gau that they are here, but the ones this man knew in that rather hedonistic place.
This, of course, is the reason he just shakes his head and offers the man an amused smile.]
Trust me when I say that you are not going to endanger anything. I can talk to you about this, without worry, because of multiple reason.
[A beat.]
It's because he trusts me and has faith in me, and knows I've fought too hard and too long to throw it away needlessly, and because he knows that education on a healthy version of this lifestyle is an important factor if someone is curious - otherwise they' might fall prey to unsafe, questionable, or downright harmful acts. So when I say it's fine to talk... I really mean it's okay, Kira-kun. I can still honor the friendship you remember in this way without betraying Gau's trust.
Re: [Video | Private]gilded_despairSeptember 3 2011, 05:16:52 UTC
[He can’t help it, he laughs at that. Soft and breathy and full of so much bitterness. Maybe it’s because while Raikou had spent his time moving through calming katas the blond had simply laid back in his bed, unable to find sleep for the haunting pressure of chilling blue eyes. He could not close his eyes without feeling the invisible weight of that gaze. And to know that Gin had been here well… it did nothing to quiet the unsettled feeling the dream had left. Certainly there had been desire, heat but those were far less persistent when all was said and done and after such time analyzing the dream he was left feeling more lost than he had in a long time. Yanked out of the world and pushed into another stranger place… only to be uprooted as soon as some semblance of familiarity settled in and thrust into this place.
And always haunted by Gin. The man had been on the island and as soon as he’d thought he was free of him had returned again. And now here he was a near tangible thing on the hitomi, brought to substance by his own subconscious.
But Raikou was concerned… worried that he might get himself into trouble… do something questionable for lack of knowledge. How very ironic. Despite that dark humorless laugh the look he gave the other man was solemn and weary. ]
Oh Shimzu-san… you’re far too late for that.
[Then he forced a faint smile, shrugging slightly.]
[Video | Private]pinktintedgamonSeptember 8 2011, 00:48:47 UTC
I...see.
[What else was he really supposed to say to that? Even without his confirmation, it's obvious that whatever experiences are haunting Kira right now aren't ones that he would have had in a good relationship with a Dominant, something that should have been built on a measure of healthy trust.
Just like that smile is so obviously forced.
So maybe that's why he doesn't hesitate, simply gives the Hitomi a considering look.]
And an offer to meet me somewhere now? How would that be received? You could come down to the shop and pick out some paper for that journal before we go to lunch or something.
[Video | Private]gilded_despairSeptember 10 2011, 04:59:48 UTC
[He's glad that Raikou does not dwell on that, that he moves on smoothly enough and more than that he's glad for the distraction from his own dark thoughts that the other man offers. The smile softens, becomes a little more genuine, and he nods slightly.]
That would be lovely... and perhaps you can tell me a few more details about this place?
[He pauses, giving his friend a sheepish look as he admitted the last part.] And you'll have to pick out a bottle of sake, of course.
[Video | Private]pinktintedgamonSeptember 16 2011, 02:04:36 UTC
That, my friend, sounds like a fine idea. Tell you what.
[Glancing around at his work, Raikou frowns thoughtfully for a moment, then nods abruptly and sends a coordinate to his friend. Because while he doesn’t particularly take joy in the man finally admitting that Raikou is right about the place... he does know that with acceptance comes even more questions.]
Meet me here, I just sent you the location, in about an hour. I should be done for the day by then, so we can go get that bottle and play twenty questions after I bind a journal for you.
Re: [Video | Private]gilded_despairSeptember 17 2011, 03:26:35 UTC
[This time hearing Raikou say “my friend” causes a pang of sadness. But it is a hope as much as a sadness because surely they could regain some of what was lost. The other man already seemed content to speak openly with him and to take steps to rebuild some of the friendship they’d had regardless of whether he remembered it and Kira couldn’t help but think of what Gau had said to him earlier. That people were drawn to each other… and maybe he was right.]
[He pauses then, and finally cuts his own gaze up to eye the man at the other end of the Hitomi, then finally sighs. Because this can't have been an easy transition from a place like that to here. Not at all.
And Kira seems nice - soft-spoken, easily flustered, and sincere - which is why Raikou finally comes to a decision and flicks the Hitomi over to private. More out of respect for Kira's already abused privacy than a need to protect the appearance of his own actions.]
Kira-san.
If you need to talk about that place, or the sentiments behind this dream, it's alright. I'm not offended - to the contrary, I'm quite flattered and no small measure of tempted in a certain way, but this type of lifestyle, the one in both of our dreams, has an underlying truth and the demand to fulfill a need. So if you need help understanding that, then it's alright.
[A beat, before he finishes softly:] I may not be in a place in my life where I can act upon those sentiments, but I can help you better understand them.
Reply
Thankfully the other man spoke again before he could let his mind get too carried away with that thought. And he was instead left staring guiltily at that that offer. Not in a place where I can act upon those sentiments. Which meant however stressed and uncertain Gau had been on Atollo they were able to work through it and end up together and happy which was precisely what his friends deserved.
He shouldn’t, he knew that… Raikou had said enough for him to know that whatever curiosity he’d had on that island was no less applicable here which meant such conversations would be… not in his friends’ best interests. So after a long contemplative moment he forces a small smile.]
While I appreciate the offer… [He tries his best not to look like he’s worried or concerned about any of it and that in and of itself is a tell though whether this Raikou will realize that is another question. It bothers him… this glimpse into what Raikou calls a lifestyle that he got at the Oasis and knowing that what he’d had with Gin had been something beyond that, something more twisted and infinitely more painful and damaging than he’d realized at first. ]
It’s fine, Shimizu-san… I… I wouldn’t want to impose. You and Meguro-san are happier here and… I wouldn’t want to do anything that might endanger that in any way. So perhaps it’s best if we… don’t discuss these topics.
Reply
This, of course, is the reason he just shakes his head and offers the man an amused smile.]
Trust me when I say that you are not going to endanger anything. I can talk to you about this, without worry, because of multiple reason.
[A beat.]
It's because he trusts me and has faith in me, and knows I've fought too hard and too long to throw it away needlessly, and because he knows that education on a healthy version of this lifestyle is an important factor if someone is curious - otherwise they' might fall prey to unsafe, questionable, or downright harmful acts. So when I say it's fine to talk... I really mean it's okay, Kira-kun. I can still honor the friendship you remember in this way without betraying Gau's trust.
Reply
And always haunted by Gin. The man had been on the island and as soon as he’d thought he was free of him had returned again. And now here he was a near tangible thing on the hitomi, brought to substance by his own subconscious.
But Raikou was concerned… worried that he might get himself into trouble… do something questionable for lack of knowledge. How very ironic. Despite that dark humorless laugh the look he gave the other man was solemn and weary. ]
Oh Shimzu-san… you’re far too late for that.
[Then he forced a faint smile, shrugging slightly.]
I do appreciate the offer though.
Reply
[What else was he really supposed to say to that? Even without his confirmation, it's obvious that whatever experiences are haunting Kira right now aren't ones that he would have had in a good relationship with a Dominant, something that should have been built on a measure of healthy trust.
Just like that smile is so obviously forced.
So maybe that's why he doesn't hesitate, simply gives the Hitomi a considering look.]
And an offer to meet me somewhere now? How would that be received? You could come down to the shop and pick out some paper for that journal before we go to lunch or something.
Reply
That would be lovely... and perhaps you can tell me a few more details about this place?
[He pauses, giving his friend a sheepish look as he admitted the last part.] And you'll have to pick out a bottle of sake, of course.
Reply
[Glancing around at his work, Raikou frowns thoughtfully for a moment, then nods abruptly and sends a coordinate to his friend. Because while he doesn’t particularly take joy in the man finally admitting that Raikou is right about the place... he does know that with acceptance comes even more questions.]
Meet me here, I just sent you the location, in about an hour. I should be done for the day by then, so we can go get that bottle and play twenty questions after I bind a journal for you.
Reply
That… sounds lovely, Shimizu-san.
Thank you.
Reply
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