Back to school
I woke up this morning, and it was autumn. It had rained all night, and it was overcast outside. I know that it's still summer, that it's too hot and humid to be anything else. But my brain thinks that it's autumn. And autumn is Back To School time, time for figuring out my life and getting a fresh wind and all that jazz.
Problem is, I'm not sure where that fresh wind is supposed to be taking me. I spent a couple of hours with law school prospectuses today, and it was fine. Better than fine, even. But I stopped reading at the 'what you'll do next' parts of the prospectuses, because I am not interested in becoming a solicitor or even a barrister. They're fine professions, and probably a better fit for me than my current job, but I'm just not sure that it's what I want.
So why law school, then? I've been thinking of law school as the bridge to the job I do want, that all-important policy position in the UN, which will make me wake up bright and chirpy each morning, eager to face the day - hopefully. But is law school really the best route? When I think about it, I think of it as a stepping stone to this position, and surely there are better, easier, different ways. Like - well, here's where you step in, and suggest stuff, and I look thoughtful. I know that my career goals involve doing a PhD - I'm one of those crazy people that actually enjoys academia - but a PhD in what? Do I go the practical route and look at Development Studies? I have a million and one ideas for a thesis, but wouldn't it be better to save that for when I can travel and do some fieldwork?
Or there's the thought that an economics PhD would be useful, but I loathed the compulsory parts of my economics degree (mainly 'cause they clashed with my job) and wouldn't I loathe it even more when I feel a million miles out of my depth? Also, I'd have to do a Master's in this - which could be good, as it would improve my quantitative skills, and bad, 'cause it would add another year to the experience and the cost.
Or there's the thought that I could go ahead with Gender Studies, which pretty much confines me to the LSE or means I need to go abroad. And would it be as useful as a more mainstream and single-disciplinary degree?
Then there's stuff that's thinking outside the box, like Oxford's African Studies MSc, which then leads to a DPhil if you do well enough. Which - ok, extra year, yet another Master's, but I qualify for the criteria they have, I have the background, and it would lead to a DPhil place (albeit in another department). I'd be using the geographical focus of my Development degree and building on that, which could be fun. Also, topical, relevant studies, rather than being locked away in economic models. Or, there's the Russian and East European Studies programme, which requires competence in Russian or another East European language - which I have, and so it would be useful - and, again, the option of going on to a DPhil in another department.
The PhD option, then, probably involves going back to full-time academia, 'cause I am not commuting that distance every day. Plus, much cheaper to live there than in London. Problems: I have no savings. I mean none. Options: I could apply for funding from a variety of institutions, and possibly get some. Well, maybe. By the time I start I should be debt-free, which helps. (Still looking at an autumn 2010 entry.) Other problems: moving out of London - big problem. Not sure if I am ready to move back to a campus uni. On the other hand, I'm not prepared to do part-time study in London, and it would be expensive to live here otherwise.
Alternatively, I could keep the job I have now - shudder - but talk to occupational health and reduce my hours to three days a week. Which is possible - it's one of the 'new parent' options. Of course, the firm has offices all over the UK, so I could do the same thing wherever I end up enrolling, part time work with maybe part-time or even full-time study, throw myself into it completely. Hmmm. But then why not simply go back to the LSE and do my PhD there? But LSE costs over £3k per year, whereas Oxford, for instance, charges a modest £2k on average per year for their PhD programmes. BUT I could go straight into a PhD at the LSE - maybe International Relations, for instance, which I could again tailor to my areas of interest, or just go ahead with Development Studies, where I had excellent grades - which would be cheaper than doing a two-year MSc followed by a three-year PhD (and I'll be a lot less ancient, too). Hmmm.
Gah. I can't decide. All I've done is talk myself out of a law course and into a PhD course, but I have no idea how the hell I'm going to re-enter full-time study! My ideal timetable is something like this -
now - autumn 2010: new job, something development-related and fabulous.
autumn 2010 - summer 2013: PhD, something development-related and fabulous.
summer 2013: UN job, something development-related and fabulous.
You can tell I've really thought this through. Actually, ideally I'm like to enrol autumn 2009, but there's no way I'd be able to afford a return to full-time study that swiftly. But is that even something I should be doing? Will a PhD help, or do people find that it has held them back?
C'mon, flist, I've been rambling for a while, now, help me out. I know there's a stack of PhD holders out there, I wanna know what you think.
*
In unrelated news, I saw Wall.E, which was awesome. I also called an ambulance & sat with a guy who was having a heart attack, or epileptic fit, or both, which was less awesome. Well, for him, anyway. I felt pretty awesome afterwards. He was driving when he had it, so it was lucky that he simply stopped in the middle of the road rather than crashing the car, really. It really made me think - hence the thinking above, life is too short, I might have a heart attack on my way to work, etc.
Also, spent Sunday with my parents, as it was my mother's birthday yesterday. I bought her jewellery, it's what all the good daughters are doing these days. In return, she encouraged me to buy some truly gorgeous Carvela shoes, fuschia satin four inch heel with a satin ribbon tie at the front. I feel amazing in them, but see above re: difficulty in saving. Why save when you can have fuschia shoes?
Also had hair dyed back to original colour. And cut. Again with the fabulous.
*
Had weird moment when my brother asked me in a slight panic if he'd used the correct morning-after-night-before etiquette on this girl he'd slept with. Erm, what? Shouldn't you know this already, I asked. Well, yes, but this was the first time he couldn't remember her name. Or going home with her, apparently. Oy vey, boys these days. Still, it's nice to know that I was the one he asked (not that he could ask his friends, of course, because it's not the sort of thing boys discuss). Anyway, he'd turned out to be a lot more gentlemanly and polite than I had been when a similar thing happened to me, so it was all fine. Still - sheesh. I was still hoping he was a virgin, and here he is waking up in stranger's beds.
*
Did I mention I have new shoes? Flatmate Z is taking me out to a formal dinner at the Stranger's Dining Room in Westminster Palace once Recess is over (doesn't it sound like a school thing?? I can't help giggling every time she mentions it.), where I shall be showing them off. I also made reservations at The Caramel Room on a spur of the moment thing. I've decided that my life can be greatly enriched through regular injections of glamour. Yes. Pictures of outfits may well follow.
*
Oooh, dinner. I'm having Thai red chicken curry, yummy.
Problem is, I'm not sure where that fresh wind is supposed to be taking me. I spent a couple of hours with law school prospectuses today, and it was fine. Better than fine, even. But I stopped reading at the 'what you'll do next' parts of the prospectuses, because I am not interested in becoming a solicitor or even a barrister. They're fine professions, and probably a better fit for me than my current job, but I'm just not sure that it's what I want.
So why law school, then? I've been thinking of law school as the bridge to the job I do want, that all-important policy position in the UN, which will make me wake up bright and chirpy each morning, eager to face the day - hopefully. But is law school really the best route? When I think about it, I think of it as a stepping stone to this position, and surely there are better, easier, different ways. Like - well, here's where you step in, and suggest stuff, and I look thoughtful. I know that my career goals involve doing a PhD - I'm one of those crazy people that actually enjoys academia - but a PhD in what? Do I go the practical route and look at Development Studies? I have a million and one ideas for a thesis, but wouldn't it be better to save that for when I can travel and do some fieldwork?
Or there's the thought that an economics PhD would be useful, but I loathed the compulsory parts of my economics degree (mainly 'cause they clashed with my job) and wouldn't I loathe it even more when I feel a million miles out of my depth? Also, I'd have to do a Master's in this - which could be good, as it would improve my quantitative skills, and bad, 'cause it would add another year to the experience and the cost.
Or there's the thought that I could go ahead with Gender Studies, which pretty much confines me to the LSE or means I need to go abroad. And would it be as useful as a more mainstream and single-disciplinary degree?
Then there's stuff that's thinking outside the box, like Oxford's African Studies MSc, which then leads to a DPhil if you do well enough. Which - ok, extra year, yet another Master's, but I qualify for the criteria they have, I have the background, and it would lead to a DPhil place (albeit in another department). I'd be using the geographical focus of my Development degree and building on that, which could be fun. Also, topical, relevant studies, rather than being locked away in economic models. Or, there's the Russian and East European Studies programme, which requires competence in Russian or another East European language - which I have, and so it would be useful - and, again, the option of going on to a DPhil in another department.
The PhD option, then, probably involves going back to full-time academia, 'cause I am not commuting that distance every day. Plus, much cheaper to live there than in London. Problems: I have no savings. I mean none. Options: I could apply for funding from a variety of institutions, and possibly get some. Well, maybe. By the time I start I should be debt-free, which helps. (Still looking at an autumn 2010 entry.) Other problems: moving out of London - big problem. Not sure if I am ready to move back to a campus uni. On the other hand, I'm not prepared to do part-time study in London, and it would be expensive to live here otherwise.
Alternatively, I could keep the job I have now - shudder - but talk to occupational health and reduce my hours to three days a week. Which is possible - it's one of the 'new parent' options. Of course, the firm has offices all over the UK, so I could do the same thing wherever I end up enrolling, part time work with maybe part-time or even full-time study, throw myself into it completely. Hmmm. But then why not simply go back to the LSE and do my PhD there? But LSE costs over £3k per year, whereas Oxford, for instance, charges a modest £2k on average per year for their PhD programmes. BUT I could go straight into a PhD at the LSE - maybe International Relations, for instance, which I could again tailor to my areas of interest, or just go ahead with Development Studies, where I had excellent grades - which would be cheaper than doing a two-year MSc followed by a three-year PhD (and I'll be a lot less ancient, too). Hmmm.
Gah. I can't decide. All I've done is talk myself out of a law course and into a PhD course, but I have no idea how the hell I'm going to re-enter full-time study! My ideal timetable is something like this -
now - autumn 2010: new job, something development-related and fabulous.
autumn 2010 - summer 2013: PhD, something development-related and fabulous.
summer 2013: UN job, something development-related and fabulous.
You can tell I've really thought this through. Actually, ideally I'm like to enrol autumn 2009, but there's no way I'd be able to afford a return to full-time study that swiftly. But is that even something I should be doing? Will a PhD help, or do people find that it has held them back?
C'mon, flist, I've been rambling for a while, now, help me out. I know there's a stack of PhD holders out there, I wanna know what you think.
*
In unrelated news, I saw Wall.E, which was awesome. I also called an ambulance & sat with a guy who was having a heart attack, or epileptic fit, or both, which was less awesome. Well, for him, anyway. I felt pretty awesome afterwards. He was driving when he had it, so it was lucky that he simply stopped in the middle of the road rather than crashing the car, really. It really made me think - hence the thinking above, life is too short, I might have a heart attack on my way to work, etc.
Also, spent Sunday with my parents, as it was my mother's birthday yesterday. I bought her jewellery, it's what all the good daughters are doing these days. In return, she encouraged me to buy some truly gorgeous Carvela shoes, fuschia satin four inch heel with a satin ribbon tie at the front. I feel amazing in them, but see above re: difficulty in saving. Why save when you can have fuschia shoes?
Also had hair dyed back to original colour. And cut. Again with the fabulous.
*
Had weird moment when my brother asked me in a slight panic if he'd used the correct morning-after-night-before etiquette on this girl he'd slept with. Erm, what? Shouldn't you know this already, I asked. Well, yes, but this was the first time he couldn't remember her name. Or going home with her, apparently. Oy vey, boys these days. Still, it's nice to know that I was the one he asked (not that he could ask his friends, of course, because it's not the sort of thing boys discuss). Anyway, he'd turned out to be a lot more gentlemanly and polite than I had been when a similar thing happened to me, so it was all fine. Still - sheesh. I was still hoping he was a virgin, and here he is waking up in stranger's beds.
*
Did I mention I have new shoes? Flatmate Z is taking me out to a formal dinner at the Stranger's Dining Room in Westminster Palace once Recess is over (doesn't it sound like a school thing?? I can't help giggling every time she mentions it.), where I shall be showing them off. I also made reservations at The Caramel Room on a spur of the moment thing. I've decided that my life can be greatly enriched through regular injections of glamour. Yes. Pictures of outfits may well follow.
*
Oooh, dinner. I'm having Thai red chicken curry, yummy.