Country music, crazy lyrics and drinking song
*laughing hard* Oh people, I love country music! Their lyrics are just amazing!!!
Drop Kick Me Jesus Through The Goalposts Of Life
Song from Bobby Bare Greatest Hits, Bareworks Inc.
Words and music by Paul Craft.
CD, BWCD-040292
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Make me, oh make me, Lord more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly tempestion below
I’ve got the will, Lord if you’ve got the toe.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Take all the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick’em up front in the offensive line.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Yeah, Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
This one is kinda romantic... Great to sing when you're really drunk and depressed (and really drunk) because you've just split up with someone.
Johnny Cash - Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
From the backdoor of your life you swept me out dear
In the bread line of your dreams I lost my place
At the table of your love I got the brush off
At the Indianapolis of your heart I lost the race
I've been washed down the sink of your conscience
In the theater of your love I lost my part
And now you say you've got me out of your conscience
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart
In the garbage disposal of you dreams I've been ground up dear
On the river of your plans I'm up the creek
Up the elevator of your future I've been shafted
On the calendar of your events I'm last week
I've been washed down the sink of your conscience
In the theater of your love I lost my part
And now you say you've got me out of your conscience
This one is even better to sing when you're... drunk. ;) No one sober would sing such things.
Randy Hanzlick - I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
Jimmy and I were brothers.
We went down different paths.
Jimmy always listened to my mother,
And me, I never like to take a bath.
As we grew and tumbled through adulthood
The pressure caused emotional drain.
So now I'm slowly dying in the bottle
and Jimmy has to live with half a brain.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
Jimmy let his troubles drive him crazy.
He never tried to drown it in a drink.
I know that drinking makes my thinking hazy,
But at least I still have brains enough to think.
Jimmy's got a brain that isn't stable.
He doesn't have the sense to say his name.
I'm sorry that his doctor was unable
To remove the proper portion of his brain.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
Funny how the world works.
People can be real jerks.
Some prefer the tension over booze.
Either way it ends the same.
Hard to beat the living game.
Might as well enjoy it while you lose.
When I need a drink I start to shiver
And Jimmy always viewed it with concern.
But I'd rather have cirrhosis of the liver
Than an intellect that's second to a fern.
I wonder if old Jimmy's gonna hear it
When I tell him that his logic wasn't sound.
They'll dose him up on lots of evil spirits
When they take him to the psychiatric grounds.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart
And another deep song about life, Jesus and... drinking. Surprise.
Jimmy Buffett - My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus Lyrics
(1975)
Chorus:
My head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus (oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kind of mornin'
Really was that kind of night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Went down to the snake pit
To drink a little beer
Listen to the jukebox
Merle was comin' in clear
All of a sudden I wad'n alone
Pickin' country music with ol' Joe Bones
Duval Street was rockin'
My eyes they starting poppin'
Because there she sat at the corner of the bar
As I broke another string on my ol' guitar
Someone call a cab
Lady won'tcha pay my tab
Chorus:
And now my head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus
(oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kinda mornin'
Really was that kinda night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Gotta get a little orange juice
And a Darvon for my head
I can't spend all day
Baby layin' in the bed
I'm goin' down to Fausto's get some chocolate milk
Can't spend my life in yer sheets of silk
I've got to find my way
Crawl out and greet the day
Chorus:
But now my head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus
(oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kinda mornin'
Really was that kinda night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Let me tell ya, I be roarin' Friday night
I mean I'll be
Roarin'
Friday
Night
And at the end you can always sing "Lord, I'm gonna stop drinking" by Paice/Ashton... Which is not country but a great drinking song and that's the reason I love it.
"I know what your thinking
but I'm gonna stop drinking
........Some day"
Drop Kick Me Jesus Through The Goalposts Of Life
Song from Bobby Bare Greatest Hits, Bareworks Inc.
Words and music by Paul Craft.
CD, BWCD-040292
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Make me, oh make me, Lord more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly tempestion below
I’ve got the will, Lord if you’ve got the toe.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Take all the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick’em up front in the offensive line.
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
Yeah, Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me Jesus through the goal posts of life.
This one is kinda romantic... Great to sing when you're really drunk and depressed (and really drunk) because you've just split up with someone.
Johnny Cash - Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
From the backdoor of your life you swept me out dear
In the bread line of your dreams I lost my place
At the table of your love I got the brush off
At the Indianapolis of your heart I lost the race
I've been washed down the sink of your conscience
In the theater of your love I lost my part
And now you say you've got me out of your conscience
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart
In the garbage disposal of you dreams I've been ground up dear
On the river of your plans I'm up the creek
Up the elevator of your future I've been shafted
On the calendar of your events I'm last week
I've been washed down the sink of your conscience
In the theater of your love I lost my part
And now you say you've got me out of your conscience
This one is even better to sing when you're... drunk. ;) No one sober would sing such things.
Randy Hanzlick - I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
Jimmy and I were brothers.
We went down different paths.
Jimmy always listened to my mother,
And me, I never like to take a bath.
As we grew and tumbled through adulthood
The pressure caused emotional drain.
So now I'm slowly dying in the bottle
and Jimmy has to live with half a brain.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
Jimmy let his troubles drive him crazy.
He never tried to drown it in a drink.
I know that drinking makes my thinking hazy,
But at least I still have brains enough to think.
Jimmy's got a brain that isn't stable.
He doesn't have the sense to say his name.
I'm sorry that his doctor was unable
To remove the proper portion of his brain.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
Funny how the world works.
People can be real jerks.
Some prefer the tension over booze.
Either way it ends the same.
Hard to beat the living game.
Might as well enjoy it while you lose.
When I need a drink I start to shiver
And Jimmy always viewed it with concern.
But I'd rather have cirrhosis of the liver
Than an intellect that's second to a fern.
I wonder if old Jimmy's gonna hear it
When I tell him that his logic wasn't sound.
They'll dose him up on lots of evil spirits
When they take him to the psychiatric grounds.
Yes, me, I've got a bottle in front of me,
And Jimmy has a frontal lobotomy.
Just different ways to kill the pain the same.
But I'd rather have a bottle in front of me,
Than have to have a frontal lobotomy.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane.
I might be drunk, but at least I'm not insane
I've been flushed from the bathroom of your heart
And another deep song about life, Jesus and... drinking. Surprise.
Jimmy Buffett - My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus Lyrics
(1975)
Chorus:
My head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus (oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kind of mornin'
Really was that kind of night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Went down to the snake pit
To drink a little beer
Listen to the jukebox
Merle was comin' in clear
All of a sudden I wad'n alone
Pickin' country music with ol' Joe Bones
Duval Street was rockin'
My eyes they starting poppin'
Because there she sat at the corner of the bar
As I broke another string on my ol' guitar
Someone call a cab
Lady won'tcha pay my tab
Chorus:
And now my head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus
(oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kinda mornin'
Really was that kinda night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Gotta get a little orange juice
And a Darvon for my head
I can't spend all day
Baby layin' in the bed
I'm goin' down to Fausto's get some chocolate milk
Can't spend my life in yer sheets of silk
I've got to find my way
Crawl out and greet the day
Chorus:
But now my head hurts, my feet stink, and I don't love Jesus
(oh my lordy it's that...)
It's that kinda mornin'
Really was that kinda night
Tryin' to tell myself that my condition is improvin'
And if I don't die by Thursday I'll be roarin' Friday night
Let me tell ya, I be roarin' Friday night
I mean I'll be
Roarin'
Friday
Night
And at the end you can always sing "Lord, I'm gonna stop drinking" by Paice/Ashton... Which is not country but a great drinking song and that's the reason I love it.
"I know what your thinking
but I'm gonna stop drinking
........Some day"