Meant to be Here?
I was reading The Daily today and saw the advertisement "how'd you get here" which is meant to inform us of which advertising scheme worked in attracting us to Prov. This led me to think of my story, why I came to Prov. It all began back in grade eleven when my band teacher came into Gimli Video, and saw me watching Zoolander, (for probably the 30th time) we talked for a little while and then he told me that I should do something more meaningful with my time, like learn Japanese or something. I very much agreed with him (Zoolander is a funny movie, but really, I could have done better things with my time as I worked at the video store). Prior to this talk I had no interest in Asian culture, not that it isn't interesting, but I just wasn't, I don't know what happened though, but something internally snapped and I suddenly had a great desire to learn Japanese, within the week I found myself in a Chapters bookstore buying a living language Japanese lesson text book and found myself devouring it, though I still am not finished it, but I did get pretty far. The next week a man came into the video store asking me if he could post a poster in the window. I said "ok," and then after he left I went to go look at the poster, to see what it was for, (I probably should have done that before it was posted, but it is better late then never). I read the poster and it was a poster put out by TESOL Canada, and it talked of a five day course in TESOL no degree necessary, neither did one need to know the language of the country they would visit. I was ready to quit high school right then and head off to lands unknown, but I guess it was sound reason which kept me going through past my grade 12 year. Within a week of my reading the poster I was talking to a friend on MSN and she was talking about her sister who did a one year course in TESOL at Prov. My brain started thinking hmm... maybe this is right for me, maybe God is leading me in this direction. And to my mind a one year training in TESOL I would think much better than a five day course. So I looked into the Prov program and decided that is what I would do, one year, in and out. Over the summer after my high school graduation I began reading up on teaching English in Japan and found out about the JET Programme, which essentially is the dream programme for anyone wanting to teach English in Japan. One week before coming to Prov, I saw that applicants into the JET Programme, needed a degree, (it could be a degree in architecture, or anything, but it needed to be a degree), unfortuanately the Prov Programme was only a certificate. So I looked into it and found out that a student could take a BA in educational studies with a TESOL certificate on the side. This is almost exactly what i needed, I would get to learn about education, and about teaching English, and only need to study for three years to get the Education training, which normally would not happen until one reaches their fourth year in a Bed. program at a university. So things were looking up, I could do three years in a christian environment, with my best friend from grade one and then use that to go to Japan pretty good eh?
However... now that I am nearing the end of my degree here at Prov things have somewhat fallen apart. The JET programme recently changed their acceptance policy so now one needs a degree from an institution which is a member of the AUCC, which Prov is not. Not only this, but all of my courses conflicted last semester and due to Morgan not allowing me to do a directed study on a course which was required for my degree, I was forced to choose between whether I wanted to graduate with, a degree, or a certificate. I chose the degree. Having taken only one of the many TESOL courses. Now before going to Japan I will have to take a minimum of one more year at the U of M, but it will probably end up being more like two, because I doubt that courses such as Jesus and the Gospels transfer into either an English or History major/minor. Not only this, but I will be graduating without my TESOL certificate which is what I originally came for. Not only that, but I feel that I have wasted three years of my life. I have met some great friends and great people, but really I am leaving with a relatively useless degree and without the useful TESOL certificate and will have to do five years of schooling before I will have the degree i need in order to go to Japan instead of the three it normally would take.
Also, Providence has changed my Christianity, I am kind of glad that it did, though I no longer fit in with my home church/most churches or even with many people here for that matter, nor do I really want to. I do remember being happy where I was at with God pre Prov... ignorant is bliss. I would almost still want to have a very ignorant and uninformed Christianity and be happy and still "sure" of things, and fit in with people then be more experienced and outcast, I often feel as though I have to "play the Christian" both in classes and at home so that I can still converse with my friends. is it worth it? Part of me wants to give up on this Christianity thing, even if I still do believe in God, part of me just wants to walk away and give up even though I believe that right answers are out there, I just don't think they are easily accessible from a Chrisitan worldview. I also have to take a class entitled Foundations of Christian Education, in which I have to say why I believe Christian education to be the only beneficial way of educating children. How should I as a person who doesn't even want to associate myself with what christianity has become, and what an overwhelming majority of people think it means to be Christian, and who doesn't agree with many of the "foundations" of the faith write papers on why I think the Christian philosophy is the best way/only way to educate our children. Again I am forced to act "christian" or not get my degree. Another question is, do I even want the degree from a Christian institution than believes and endorses things that I do not want to associate myself with?
I dunno, I have been feeling crappy lately, and this is part of the reason why, there are other forces at work, but I just thought I would vent for a while about some of them.
oh, and I am very thankful for many of the friends I have met at Prov, and I realise that I would not have met them had I not attended.
and Gloria, because you are probably one of the few I have that are left reading my rant thank you!
~Justin Goodman
However... now that I am nearing the end of my degree here at Prov things have somewhat fallen apart. The JET programme recently changed their acceptance policy so now one needs a degree from an institution which is a member of the AUCC, which Prov is not. Not only this, but all of my courses conflicted last semester and due to Morgan not allowing me to do a directed study on a course which was required for my degree, I was forced to choose between whether I wanted to graduate with, a degree, or a certificate. I chose the degree. Having taken only one of the many TESOL courses. Now before going to Japan I will have to take a minimum of one more year at the U of M, but it will probably end up being more like two, because I doubt that courses such as Jesus and the Gospels transfer into either an English or History major/minor. Not only this, but I will be graduating without my TESOL certificate which is what I originally came for. Not only that, but I feel that I have wasted three years of my life. I have met some great friends and great people, but really I am leaving with a relatively useless degree and without the useful TESOL certificate and will have to do five years of schooling before I will have the degree i need in order to go to Japan instead of the three it normally would take.
Also, Providence has changed my Christianity, I am kind of glad that it did, though I no longer fit in with my home church/most churches or even with many people here for that matter, nor do I really want to. I do remember being happy where I was at with God pre Prov... ignorant is bliss. I would almost still want to have a very ignorant and uninformed Christianity and be happy and still "sure" of things, and fit in with people then be more experienced and outcast, I often feel as though I have to "play the Christian" both in classes and at home so that I can still converse with my friends. is it worth it? Part of me wants to give up on this Christianity thing, even if I still do believe in God, part of me just wants to walk away and give up even though I believe that right answers are out there, I just don't think they are easily accessible from a Chrisitan worldview. I also have to take a class entitled Foundations of Christian Education, in which I have to say why I believe Christian education to be the only beneficial way of educating children. How should I as a person who doesn't even want to associate myself with what christianity has become, and what an overwhelming majority of people think it means to be Christian, and who doesn't agree with many of the "foundations" of the faith write papers on why I think the Christian philosophy is the best way/only way to educate our children. Again I am forced to act "christian" or not get my degree. Another question is, do I even want the degree from a Christian institution than believes and endorses things that I do not want to associate myself with?
I dunno, I have been feeling crappy lately, and this is part of the reason why, there are other forces at work, but I just thought I would vent for a while about some of them.
oh, and I am very thankful for many of the friends I have met at Prov, and I realise that I would not have met them had I not attended.
and Gloria, because you are probably one of the few I have that are left reading my rant thank you!
~Justin Goodman