A "Break" my ass.
Yeah, well, I don't know if I'm depressed or pissed off. I'm fucking confused right now. Nicole feels the strain of a long distance relationship getting to her. She's being tempted left and right and she's been acting really odd lately. I called her out on it. She tells me she doesn't "trust herself" anymore. She hasn't cheated on me, but she doesn't know if she can hold out. I'm a confused mess at this time. I suppose she used that to her advantage, I don't know. Maybe she didn't even notice.
So yeah, we decide to go on a "break" until I can visit her again. I was thinking this over and talked to a couple of my lady friends and most of them agreed that I should let her go or something. I'm fairly sure I should do the same also, now that I've had a time to steel the ol' heart up a bit. Seven fucking years and I finally break. Bah. Women. I could barely go to sleep today. Kept getting her face in my head and it hurt too much. I know this sounds incredibly emo and that's not what I am, but wholly shit, if this is how they feel, then they should really just kill themselves.
...
That didn't come out right. They should kill themselves. I should kill other people. Yes. There we go. That sounds better. No, I am, nor will I ever be, suicidal.
So yeah, back to what I was saying. I was thinking it over before I went to sleep. I'm going to lay it down on her. If she does decide to sleep with someone while we are on this "break," then I am not going to accept her back. I won't be able to trust her. I can't have a relationship with a woman that I don't trust. I'm fairly certain this relationship is over. If she sleeps with someone before I can go on leave, I'm not going to visit her. I'm going straight to the parents' house and spending time there.
Merry Fucking Christmas, Chris. Jesus Christ loves you.
These last two Christmas' have been the worst of my life. :D Isn't that super? Last year it was an accident and my Uncle dying. This year it's a woman breaking my heart.
Fucking. Awesome.
I blame it all on the Army. All of it. I hate the Army that much more. I'm going to be depressed for the next two months. God, I hate this place so fucking much. Oh good, I just got bitched out, too. Just now. That's great. WOOO! I LOVE IRAQ! <3 <3 <3
Edit: Well, I just read an e-mail from my Mom and she says I should just give her her space. And I'm going to do that. I'll talk to her still, but I'm going to enjoy this break as much as I can.
... Why the Hell do I have to be in Iraq at this time? Why can't I be back home? ARGH! I fucking hate the Army.
So yeah, we decide to go on a "break" until I can visit her again. I was thinking this over and talked to a couple of my lady friends and most of them agreed that I should let her go or something. I'm fairly sure I should do the same also, now that I've had a time to steel the ol' heart up a bit. Seven fucking years and I finally break. Bah. Women. I could barely go to sleep today. Kept getting her face in my head and it hurt too much. I know this sounds incredibly emo and that's not what I am, but wholly shit, if this is how they feel, then they should really just kill themselves.
...
That didn't come out right. They should kill themselves. I should kill other people. Yes. There we go. That sounds better. No, I am, nor will I ever be, suicidal.
So yeah, back to what I was saying. I was thinking it over before I went to sleep. I'm going to lay it down on her. If she does decide to sleep with someone while we are on this "break," then I am not going to accept her back. I won't be able to trust her. I can't have a relationship with a woman that I don't trust. I'm fairly certain this relationship is over. If she sleeps with someone before I can go on leave, I'm not going to visit her. I'm going straight to the parents' house and spending time there.
Merry Fucking Christmas, Chris. Jesus Christ loves you.
These last two Christmas' have been the worst of my life. :D Isn't that super? Last year it was an accident and my Uncle dying. This year it's a woman breaking my heart.
Fucking. Awesome.
I blame it all on the Army. All of it. I hate the Army that much more. I'm going to be depressed for the next two months. God, I hate this place so fucking much. Oh good, I just got bitched out, too. Just now. That's great. WOOO! I LOVE IRAQ! <3 <3 <3
Edit: Well, I just read an e-mail from my Mom and she says I should just give her her space. And I'm going to do that. I'll talk to her still, but I'm going to enjoy this break as much as I can.
... Why the Hell do I have to be in Iraq at this time? Why can't I be back home? ARGH! I fucking hate the Army.