(no subject)
For a long time now, newspapers have had to cope with headlines rendered ambiguous by the need to save space. But the Straits Times Online is such a repeat offender that I managed to grab the following from one page alone (the "Singapore news" section), accessed today:
Teen on probation over sex
Nude couple charged
Wife wins suit
Seriously? OK, "wife wins suit" doesn't sound too bad. Most of the time, the only suit you could win is a lawsuit (though I hesitate to say that the winners actually do win). But legally, I'm not sure what the hell kind of suit it is. Looking at the scant report more closely, it doesn't actually seem like a lawsuit but a request for a judicial declaration. The distinction might be lost on non-lawyers, but the practical difference is this - in a suit as commonly known, you sue someone. Nobody's getting sued here.
Next, "Nude couple charged". Has a nude painting/sculpture/person been couple-charged to, say, transfer the energy from lightning strikes into the earth? No, it's two people who got criminal charges preferred against them for streaking. The use of the artistic-sounding word "nude" in lieu of more bare-bottom in-your-face words such as "streaking" or "naked" or their various cognates, is probably the result of some serious, sphincter-grinding anal-retentiveness somewhere in the Singapore Press Holdings offices. Besides, I'm sure they've long since put their clothes back on. They're not still nude, are they? Perhaps when they're bathing.
Finally. "Teen on probation over sex" makes it sound like sex is illegal, or that teen sex is illegal (or otherwise punishable by probation). I'm sure the pumping, probing, heaving bulk of teen sex is illegal, but the age of sexual majority is still somewhere in the teens, so it's not as if Singapore is some hotbed of prudishness. This guy had sex with a ten-year-old. Surely, this fact should somehow "probate" its way into the headline? Also, the headline could be misconstrued as suggesting there is such a thing as "probation over sex". As in, a probation-related type of "over sex".
Singapore Press Holdings. Where did they win their awards from, again?
Teen on probation over sex
Nude couple charged
Wife wins suit
Seriously? OK, "wife wins suit" doesn't sound too bad. Most of the time, the only suit you could win is a lawsuit (though I hesitate to say that the winners actually do win). But legally, I'm not sure what the hell kind of suit it is. Looking at the scant report more closely, it doesn't actually seem like a lawsuit but a request for a judicial declaration. The distinction might be lost on non-lawyers, but the practical difference is this - in a suit as commonly known, you sue someone. Nobody's getting sued here.
Next, "Nude couple charged". Has a nude painting/sculpture/person been couple-charged to, say, transfer the energy from lightning strikes into the earth? No, it's two people who got criminal charges preferred against them for streaking. The use of the artistic-sounding word "nude" in lieu of more bare-bottom in-your-face words such as "streaking" or "naked" or their various cognates, is probably the result of some serious, sphincter-grinding anal-retentiveness somewhere in the Singapore Press Holdings offices. Besides, I'm sure they've long since put their clothes back on. They're not still nude, are they? Perhaps when they're bathing.
Finally. "Teen on probation over sex" makes it sound like sex is illegal, or that teen sex is illegal (or otherwise punishable by probation). I'm sure the pumping, probing, heaving bulk of teen sex is illegal, but the age of sexual majority is still somewhere in the teens, so it's not as if Singapore is some hotbed of prudishness. This guy had sex with a ten-year-old. Surely, this fact should somehow "probate" its way into the headline? Also, the headline could be misconstrued as suggesting there is such a thing as "probation over sex". As in, a probation-related type of "over sex".
Singapore Press Holdings. Where did they win their awards from, again?