[KameDa Competition] Mr. Thief (The Mind’s Challenge)

[yukimahou]

Title: Mr. Thief (The Mind’s Challenge)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: AU, Humor, Romance, Fluff
Warnings: None, I think...
Summary: Kamenashi Kazuya, a seller of beach equipment, finds an unconscious man lying next to his booth. When the man, wakes up, he introduces himself as Ueda Tatsuya, a thief. Kazuya doesn’t believe and thereby hurts the man’s pride. To prove he really is a thief, Ueda agrees to a challenge made by Kamenashi who, unfortunately, is the weirdest man Tatsuya have ever met.


Ueda Tatsuya groaned silently feeling something poking his side a bit painfully. He tried to move but his body felt too heavy. He heard someone talking next to him before he was poked again. Ueda wanted nothing else but to be left alone - he was tired. He would be the happiest man in the world if the person disturbing his peace disappeared. But his wish didn’t come true, on the contrary something ice-cold dropped on his face.

Ueda flinched and finally moved. He brought his head up looking at the man crouching in front of him. They blinked at each other in surprise before the man smiled happily. Ueda glared at the guy in annoyance - he was the one disturbing him.

“You’re alive! I thought you’re a dead body that a wave threw out on the shore. That’s good! It would be bad if you were dead - my booth stands right here, I would lose clients. Why are you here? Oh! Oh! Are you a merman? Wait, you can’t be one, you have no tail. Don’t tell me… are you a surfer that crashed on some rock? Nah… your clothes aren’t wet. Or maybe-” The man was talking excitedly and Tatsuya was getting a headache.

“Can you shut up?! Who the hell are you anyway?” Ueda asked harshly but the man seemed not to mind the rude remark. Actually, the man’s smile seemed to widen even more.

“I’m Kamenashi Kazuya but you can call me Kame. I’m a beach equipment seller. I saw you lying here and decided to check if you’re alive.” Ueda stared at the man, Kame, wondering if he was just happy that Tatsuya was alive or he was just simply an idiot smiling so brightly at some stranger.

Kazuya stared back at the man still lying down and tilted his head slightly - the man was glaring at him for some reason. Kame shrugged and concentrated again on the ice-cream he was holding in his left hand. He licked it a bit in delight completely ignoring the fact that some droplets were falling down his hand and straight onto the other man’s face.

Ueda moved away quickly. Kame just blinked at him and looked at his hand. He pouted seeing white liquid covering his fingers. He brought the ice-cream to his other hand and then licked his fingers clean. With a happy grin he started eating his delicacy again unaware of how his behavior affected the other.

Tatsuya felt his blood heating up but he wasn’t exactly sure if it was because the guy looked damn sexy licking his fingers like that with such innocent expression or because Ueda was completely annoyed by the icky liquid on his face and the oblivious guy. He stood up followed quickly by Kame who was still staring at him. Ueda glared at the man. The man looked confused for a second before with a smile he presented his ice-cream to Ueda. Tatsuya looked at the sweet offering and then back at the man wondering what was on his mind.

“What do you want?” Kame cocked his head to the side again blinking at the other in even bigger confusion, before replying innocently.

“I thought you wanted ice-cream.” Kame shrugged and pulled his hand back. “What’s your name? I’ve already introduced myself now is your turn.”

“Ueda Tatsuya,” he said shortly hoping that the man would just leave him alone - unfortunately, it wasn’t that easy.

“Hm… And what do you do, Tat-chan?”

“’Tat-chan?’” Ueda looked at him in shock and anger. The guy was being too familiar with him - they weren’t friends, on the contrary they just met each other and Kame was already using a nickname while talking to him - it wasn’t normal! The guy was crazy!

“Yup! It sounds cute, right Tat-chan?” Kame said beaming while Ueda was sure the guy had a few screws loose - he was way too weird even for Tatsuya’s taste. Ueda sighed while rubbing his eyes tiredly.

“Listen, Kamenashi…”

“Kame! I told you to call me Kame.” The man pouted and Ueda decided to ignore him.

“Listen, KameNASHI. I’m a dangerous thief. Just yesterday I robbed a bank and stole a big sack of money. As you can see, I wasn’t caught by the police which means I’m rather good at what I’m doing. So don’t call me ‘Tat-chan’ because it doesn’t fit a robber like me.” Seeing a questioning expression on the man’s face, Ueda couldn’t stay calm. “And I’m not your freaking friend, idiot! Don’t act so familiar with me, capisce?!” He hissed dangerously but Kazuya only pouted more.

“But why~? I like ‘Tat-chan’ why can’t I use it?”

“Argh! Because I said so!” Ueda growled out having a big desire to smack the other painfully.

“Then how should I call you?”

“Just call me Ueda - we’re strangers after all,” Ueda tsked and rolled his eyes. He wanted to just turn around and walk away but something was holding him back from doing it - most probably the fact that despite being noisy and irritating, Kame was somewhat interesting. He seemed very childish and his eyes were shining almost innocently. Almost. There was this small spark of mischievousness and something else that Ueda couldn’t figure out.

“But it’s boring and so~ serious,” Kazuya whined.

“I’m a thief - it’s a serious business. I have reputation to keep.”

Ueda was brushing off some dirt from his clothes when he realized Kame suddenly went quiet. Somehow it made Tatsuya nervous because he could see that the man in front of him was thinking intensively and that couldn’t be good - Kame was frowning slightly, eyes focused on Tatsuya. Absentmindedly he was licking his ice-cream. Ueda fidgeted and blinked at the sight of a pout followed by a half smirk - it was a bad sign.

“Ne~, Tat-chan? Are you really a thief? You don’t look like one.”

“Huh?! Of course I’m a thief! And how would you know how a real thief looks like anyway? You’re just a seller.” Ueda furrowed his eyebrows in suspicion but Kame just innocently shrugged his shoulders with a smile.

“I don’t know but for me you don’t look like one. Are you sure you’re not a random guy who decided to sunbathe and fell asleep?”

“I am a thief! And who the hell is sunbathing with their clothes on?!” Ueda got even more irritated - Kazuya didn’t seem to get even the most obvious things but what he said next only showed how weird the man was.

“Then prove it!” Ueda’s jaw dropped in an instant.

“Huh?!” He asked intelligently but Kame was just stubbornly looking at him waiting for his answer. “Wait. You want me to prove it I’m a thief? Are you retarded? What normal person would ask a thief to prove who he is?” Ueda asked stunned, but Kame just blinked at him.

“But how can I know if you really are who you claim you are when I can’t see who you are. You said you robbed a bank but where’s the money? You can see my booth, right? But I can’t see anything that would tell me you’re really a thief,” Kame explained calmly.

“But I am one, damn it!!!” Tatsuya yelled but Kazuya just gave him a small smile shrugging a bit still not convinced.

“Whatever you say, Mr. Thief.”

Ueda couldn’t take it anymore - the man was impossible! It was obvious the man was an airhead and an escapee from some mental institution. Tatsuya was about to tell the man to get lost but the moment he opened his mouth he caught a sight of a familiar silhouette coming from around the corner. His eyes widened and he quickly hid himself behind Kamenashi’s booth. The man looked at him puzzled but a second later he was smiling again.

Kame looked towards the place Ueda was staring at and saw officer Taguchi approaching him in steady, confident steps. Kazuya smiled at the man brightly waving a bit to him in a greeting. Taguchi suddenly straightened up making his chest look broader. He seemed a bit taller as well. His smiled was as bright, if not brighter than Kame’s.

Ueda blinked twice at the weird sight before his jaw dropped when he realized that Taguchi Junnosuke, the guy who almost caught him a day before, had a crush on Kamenashi Kazuya, the biggest retard he had ever met. Tatsuya wasn’t sure if he should laugh or pity the man - it was painfully obvious that Kamenashi didn’t like the man in that way - Ueda had no doubts Kame was oblivious to the other’s affection or, which somehow seemed more believable to Tatsuya, he simply ignored Taguchi’s feelings. Why was it more believable? Kazuya might be childish, annoying and an idiot but his eyes, as innocent as they seemed, had a hint of something that made you wonder what the guy was really thinking.

Ueda shook his head and lowered it a bit so Taguchi wouldn’t see him. He observed as the tall man came up to the booth and bowed a bit to Kamenashi.

“Kamenashi-san, how are you? Everything’s okay? You don’t have any problems with customers or high-school delinquents, do you? Because if you have I will immediately find them and make sure they won’t bother you again.” Taguchi said seriously staring at Kame intensely. Tatsuya had a huge urge to stand up - he was sure Taguchi wouldn’t see him anyway; he was too fixated on his crush to see anything apart from the man standing in front of him.

“Nope, I have no such problems, Taguchi-san but thank you for asking.” Kazuya replied with a smile. “Ano… Is it true that someone robbed a bank yesterday?” Kame asked, cutely tilting his head to the side and Ueda wondered if he did it on purpose or maybe it really was an unconscious gesture.

“Ah, so you heard about it. Unfortunately, the thief got to escape. I almost caught him. I grabbed his arm already when one of his comrades pulled me away. I ran after them but there was a sudden commotion and I lost them. But I promise, I will catch him. I won’t let him even touch a single hair on your pretty head. I only want you to be careful, Kamenashi-san. I would hate myself if something happened to you.”

Ueda rolled his eyes and almost threw up when he saw Taguchi grabbing Kame’s hand in his like a prince from some odd fairytale where the role of a princess plays a clown. Well, at least the said clown was good-looking so he could be easily mistaken for a prince himself - it was a shame that his personality was distorted.

Kazuya smiled widely but pulled his hand back from the officer's hold. Taguchi was rather reluctant but having no other choice he let go of a smooth hand. Kame was still grinning at him but Ueda could see a small twitch of his lips. He wasn't sure if Kazuya was annoyed or rather a bit scared of the taller guy - either way, he distanced himself from the officer.

"Don't worry, Officer-san, I haven't seen a single thief the whole day yesterday and I haven't seen anyone suspicious this morning," Kame answered and Taguchi tried to grab his hand again but he moved it back quickly. Instead, the officer stepped closer, almost pinning Kame to his booth.

"But tell me immediately if something happens or you see someone, please," the man said staring deeply into the other's eyes intensively.

"Of course, I will, Officer-san."

"Promise me, Kamenashi-san. Promise me you will be careful." He moved even closer making Kame bend backwards awkwardly.

"I promise," Kazuya answered quickly and despite his smiled it was obvious he was slightly uncomfortable in the position with Taguchi hovering just a few centimeters away from his face.

The officer moved back after a few seconds of intense gazing. He had a smile wider than any of Kame's normal ones. Ueda wanted to snicker. Taguchi and Kame talked for a while longer, the officer trying to seduce Kame who was too clueless to get his intentions or, what Ueda thought was more likely, he ignored the man’s attempts on purpose. Either way, Tatsuya had a hard time stopping himself from laughing like a hyena.

Sometime later Ueda got annoyed. The freaking officer seemed to completely forget about his job and still chatted with Kamenashi while Tatsuya had to crouch behind the booth without moving - his legs damn hurt! Kame tried to get rid of the ‘pest’ but the man seemed not to catch his small hints. Finally, Kazuya told the man he needs to unpack everything from his car and after he nicely declined Taguchi’s help, the officer walked away.

Ueda let out a sigh. To his surprise, Kazuya seemed equally exhausted after the conversation but in comparison to Ueda, he almost immediately got his good mood back. Grinning, Kazuya started unpacking some straw hats from a bag. Ueda straightened himself and stretched his sore limbs happily. He wanted to walk away right away but suddenly, in some miraculous way, he found himself carrying two big, inflated toy crocodiles. He blinked not understanding the situation until he saw Kame grinning at him.

“What is it?” Ueda asked dumbfounded.

“Goods I’m selling at the booth,” Kame replied innocently.

“And why did you give them to me?” The thief asked slowly the same way one’s asking a child.

“Because you’re going to help me display them in my booth and then you will help me selling them.”

Kame announced to him like it was the most normal thing in the world to make a stranger work with you without any reason. Ueda’s jaw dropped and he wanted to oppose but no words left his mouth. He was very shocked by the man for the umpteenth time today - he couldn’t foresee what the retard would come up with next.

When his voice came back it was too late. The moment he wanted to tell Kame off, customers started to come. Ueda was surprised at the number of people actually buying something from the crazy man but he had a feeling it might had something to do with the bright smiled adoring Kazuya’s face almost all the time. The man seemed nice and friendly easily attracting new clients. Ueda caught himself admiring the guy just a bit - even when a customer was annoying and fickle, Kame was able to deal with the person perfectly.

Ueda shook his head. He shouldn’t be thinking about such things - he was a thief for crying out loud! He shouldn’t admire some idiot with brain of a size of a peanut! Unfortunately, every time he wanted to speak, someone or something interrupted him - mostly it was Kazuya asking him to bring this or that from the car or to pack the item for the client. Before Ueda realized he was so engrossed in his job that the sun started setting and people slowly left the beach.

* * *

When all the boxes were back in the car, Ueda stretched his arms and gave out a sigh. He wasn’t aware that selling products can be so tiring. He opened his eyes when he heard the bang of the closing the car trunk. Kame was standing in front of him - Ueda was rather amazed that the man didn’t seem to be at least a bit exhausted after the whole day until he realized. It was Kame’s job to stand there and sell the equipment - he was simply used to it.

“Thank you for your help. Want a lift back home?” Kazuya asked with a smile, eyes shining nicely.

“I can’t go back, idiot. Why do you think I spent last night on the beach? Police observer my flat. I’m not stupid enough to go back there now.” Ueda rolled his eyes and turned around to grab a small bag that he previously missed but a snort stopped him midway.

“Of course, Mr. Thief. Officer-san is probably already hiding in the bushes for you with cuffs. I bet he cuffed himself by accident.” Ueda’s eyebrows twitched - in his anger he didn’t catch Kazuya’s sudden but very short change in personality.

“I.am.a.thief.” Ueda said through his clenched teeth. He was tired, annoyed and wanted nothing more but to rest but instead of it, he had to listen to the weirdo that was way too oblivious and naïve.

“But you didn’t prove it to me yet~! Kazuya whined, crossing his arms and pouting. Despite his rather ‘bright’ personality, he was also tired and had enough of lies given by the man he found lying lifelessly on the sand in the morning. Ueda gritted his teeth - he had enough of Kamenashi’s childishness.

“Okay, you want proof? That’s fine with me but what proof do you want? You want me to steal something or what?!” the man asked angrily. He didn’t like not being treated seriously - he was the best thief in the whole Japan, after all. Kame was way too friendly with him but the most unnerving was the fact that the weird guy talked to him like to a child.

“Hm… How about I give you challenges that will check if you have characteristics of a real thief?” Ueda was kind of stunned by, so far, the only coherent sentence the man said during their whole conversation.

“And do you know what ‘characteristics’ a real thief should have?” Tatsuya said with sarcasm evident in his voice and raised an eyebrow. Both of those gestures were ignored by Kame.

“Well… I don’t have to be a thief to know about them. I saw many movies, it’s easy to get what they need to know to be good.” Kazuya beamed. Ueda blinked and sighed - there was no point in arguing with the idiot.

“Fine… Fine, I agree but you’re going to let me stay at your place for the time being to compensate. Do you get that?”

“Yay~!” Kame clapped his hands, eyes shining happily - somehow he seemed to like the idea of living with the older man more than the fact Ueda agreed to his challenge. “Then you will help with my booth. I need to see you doing the challenges after all.”

Ueda raised an eyebrow. It was surprisingly smart sentence - at least for Kame who had the mentality of a kid or a moody teenager. Tatsuya shrugged his shoulders deciding to let it go for now. He nodded in agreement and Kazuya’s smile widened… if that’s even possible. He skipped happily to his car and got inside gesturing for Ueda to do the same.

Sitting comfortably in the car, Ueda wondered what kind of challenge he can get from the other man. Maybe Kame was a weirdo but something was telling him there was more to the man. Tatsuya was rather impatient by nature so waiting for Kamenashi to speak was making him nervous. Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore - especially that wide grin adoring Kazuya’s pretty face.

“Okay, what’s the first challenge? The quicker you tell me the better.”

“Impatient, are we~?” Kazuya teased and hummed some random tune that made Ueda click his tongue. “Yesterday at the beach some guy awfully similar to the Officer-san kicked one of my beach balls. I ran after him and by accident I caught the ice-cream that belonged to the high-school student, who wanted to give it to his crush. He is a cool guy and because of me he didn’t succeed… again.”

“What do you mean by ‘again’?” Ueda asked and Kame laughed sheepishly.

“He’s been trying to win the girl over for some time now. This time it was almost it but I interrupted them, I feel guilty.” Kazuya pouted sadly, his eyes imitating a kicked puppy.

“Okay… but what it has to do with me? With thieves?” Ueda furrowed his eyebrows wondering where this was going.

“Well… thieves have to be smart and sneaky, right? I want you to help poor Nakamaru-kun get a girlfriend.” Kazuya smiled proud of himself for thinking of something so clever while Ueda blinked at the guy owlishly.

“You’re kidding right?” Kazuya shook his head. “Then you’re insane. I’m a thief, not a matchmaker!” Tatsuya yelled at the man who just shrugged his shoulder.

“You’re thief, you need to be smart. Think of something.”

And for the first time Ueda thought that the bright smile Kazuya wore almost all the time on his face was pure evil.

* * *

The next day Kame introduced Ueda to Nakamaru-kun, the poor student that had no luck in love. Tatsuya wasn’t really surprised by that. The teenager was awkward, nerdy, shy and quiet. He also wouldn’t be surprised if the boy was a mother hen type - the one who cares about everyone acting like a nagging woman. Ueda hoped that the guy at least wore cool clothes but when the word ‘argyle’ came up, he wanted to slap himself.

Nevertheless, a deal was a deal.

1) Check what the girl thinks about him

2) Find out Nakamaru's good points.

3) Help Nakamaru get a girlfriend.

Ueda made a plan, rather simple but he had a feeling it would work. Three steps. The last step as pretty vague but after realizing first two steps, Ueda knew he would come up with the rest easily.

Despite his previous (unwillingly promised) promise to help with the booth, Kame let him go this time to take care of Nakamaru. Kame felt guilty for the ice-cream incident so the quicker Tatsuya solved the youngster's problem, the quicker he would be able to sleep peacefully.

* * *

Ueda waited in front of Nakamaru's school. They decided that the teenager would introduce Ueda as his relative. Then they would go to the cafe and talk, and when Maru excuses himself to the toilet, Tatsuya would ask the girl about the nervous guy.

Ueda didn't have to wait long. Just before 3PM, he could see the boy walking in his direction with a foreigner in tow. Somehow, he thought they looked cute together. The girl had her hair made into two pigtails which made her look almost as geeky as Nakamaru.

That information made Ueda let out a relieved breath. Maybe the case wasn't lost. If the girl was really as nerdy as he thought she was then there was a high possibility his plan would succeed. Ueda smirked already seeing Kame's shocked face when he realizes who he had met - a real thief.
When Nakamaru introduced him to the girl as his uncle, they went to the café. They talked mostly about school, Tokyo and pretty random stuff that bored Tatsuya to the core. He tried to pay attention to the conversation but when the teenagers changed the topic to homework from chemistry, Ueda turned off his brain - he went through all stages of education, he didn’t need a repeat from those times.

Instead of listening, he decided to check the place. Any other person by check would mean ‘look around to see of it’s nice and cozy’ but for Ueda it was more like ‘find out what kind of security they have and if it’s worth robbing’. There was no guard around but he spotted a few cameras - a bit too much for a café of this size. The number of customers was rather ordinary, prices average just like the taste of sweets and coffee.

Thinking about coffee Ueda thoughts drifted towards this morning.

* * *

He just woke up in the room Kame gave him for the time being. He was annoyed because Kamenashi was very noisy. He could hear some pots being moved, placed and hit. He could hear rather loud footsteps. And he could hear Kame singing something with his hoarse but yet quite high voice. Yes, Tatsuya was annoyed but he had to admit that the man was good at singing.

He wanted to bury himself under the pillow when Kame burst into his room along with his two small dogs - as bouncy and energetic as their owner. While the dogs jumped on Ueda’s bed and start licking him on the face, Kame stood beaming at the thief. Ueda groaned and propped himself on his elbows to better see the guy.

“Good morning!” Kazuya said with a wide smile but in exchange he only received a low murmur. He frowned before pouting. “Mou~ Tat-chan! You should greet someone back, you know? Now say: ‘good morning’”.

“Don’t call me ‘Tat-chan’…” the thief complained before adding ”Mornin’…” Ueda scratched his head that fell back down on the pillow.

“I didn’t hear you. You need to say it louder with more energy! Come on, Tat-chan! Say it!”

“I told you to not-! Whatever… Good morning. Happy now? I need a strong coffee…” Ueda sat up rubbing his face sleepily - he wouldn’t oblige normally but the early hour and an already building headache made him obey. He didn’t want to deal with the weird man in the morning.

“Yup! I’m very happy! I like Tat-chan soo~ much! Do you like me too?” Ueda snorted and declined but then… Kame hugged the man suddenly, making him fall back on the bed. Ueda blinked rapidly but before he could react in any way, the guy stood up and bounced out of the room. Tatsuya sat up again wondering what just happened when Kame’s head pocked out from behind the doorframe. “Breakfast’s ready. I will make you coffee! Come before it gets cold!” And he disappeared again.

Ueda opened his mouth but closed it at the lack of words. He should be annoyed by the guy’s behaviour but he decided it would be the waste of time. At least that was what he told himself because admitting that you liked having another man lying on you was an absolute ‘no-no’. And he wasn’t a forgetful person - the man hurt his pride and needed to pay for it.

Without caring about his current clothes which consistent of a pair of old tracksuit pants and underwear, he entered the kitchen. He stopped in his tracks staring at Kamenashi in fascination. The man put on a blue apron and was stirring something in a big pot. He was concentrated on his task - his face looked serious for the first time since Ueda had met him.

“Tat-chan, take a seat! I will serve you breakfast right away!” Kame smiled at him happily before turning back to the pot, tasting a bit of the soup.

Meanwhile, Ueda took his place and observed Kame’s every move. He didn’t realize earlier but the man, despite his childish personality, was rather graceful. The way his hips were swaying lightly from side to side and his hands moving elegantly while doing even the simplest tasks. The guy seemed a bit feminine but at the same time strong and manly - Ueda was surprised that someone might be like that. He himself always tried to hide his female features under the mask of coldness and toughness but Kamenashi didn’t seem to mind - he was just doing whatever he wanted.

A small noise made by a cup being placed in front of him, snapped him out of his thoughts. He looked at Kame who was staring at him waiting for something but except for the usual smile, he didn’t find anything on the other man’s face. He took the cup in his hand and smelt it. The scent was amazing. Slowly, he brought the coffee to his lips and took a sip. He hummed happily feeling a hot, black liquid making its way down his throat.

“Nice… you make good coffee, Kamenashi.” Ueda praised the other - he rarely did that but someone who can make such a heavenly drink deserved it.

“Sooo… do you like me now?” Kazuya eyes changed into the one of the puppy, looking at Tatsuya hopefully - Ueda could even see a tail wagging from side to side impatiently; the view was rather amusing. He snorted realizing Kamenashi’s plan. Well, unsuccessful plan because who would start liking someone after just a cup of good coffee?

“No, I don’t like you.”

“Mou~ You’re mean, Mr. Thief.”

And the man pouted while crossing his arms. Ueda looked at him over the rim of his cup and smirked. He chuckled silently at the man’s expression. Hard to believe or not, Ueda found him a bit cute at the moment but it still was not enough to make Tatsuya like him. After all, he was the one who offended him.

Kamenashi had to lose.

* * *

Ueda stopped daydreaming when Nakamaru elbowed his slightly while standing up to go to the toilet. When Tatsuya lost him from his sight he turned his attention to the girl that was slowly sipping on her drink.

“I have a question for you,” Ueda started and waited for the girl’s full attention. “What do you like in Yuichi?” Ueda wasn’t the most subtle people. The girl blushed a bit at the question and Ueda smirked inwardly. “I mean, he’s kind of a dork so it was a shock to me seeing him with a girl.”

“…It’s true he is a bit nerdy but I don’t mind. He’s honest, intelligent and nice. It’s hard to find someone like him.” The girl answered frankly. “And when he’s stuttering, he’s cute.” She giggled slightly.

“So he’s your type, huh?” Ueda took a sip of his coffee - it wasn’t the best but there was nothing he could do about it. Hopefully Kamenashi would make him one later.

“Um… yes but I wouldn’t mind if he changed his style a bit. I know it may sound superficial but I feel that he would look really good in plain t-shirt and jeans instead of his argyle sweaters. Also his mom once mentioned he liked making music with his mouth.”

“You mean beatbox?”

“Yes! I would really love to hear it someday.”

Ueda stared at the smiling girl for a moment - she gave him some good hints. Somehow not only did he check the girl’s preferences but also got to know about one of Nakamaru’s possible talents which moved Ueda to step two quicker than he had thought. After the boy came out of the toilet they talk for a few more minutes before Ueda excused himself asking Nakamaru to meet him tomorrow at 9. When the boy nodded in agreement, Tatsuya stood up and left the future couple going straight towards Kamenashi’s house.

* * *

When Ueda got inside he stopped suddenly. The place was strangely quiet. Kame was rather noisy no matter what he did - he had a habit of humming or singing songs during cooking or cleaning and moving around the house a lot. He was rarely sitting still for longer than a minute so the silence that enveloped Ueda was very weird.

Slowly Tatsuya moved further into the house. From one of the rooms, the small study room, the light was coming out so he quietly stepped closer to pick inside. He blinked a few times in confusion seeing Kamenashi sitting in a chair with a serious expression and wearing glasses while reading some piece of paper. He had a pen in his right hand and from time to time wrote something on a page. Next to him laid a thick pile of paper.

Ueda knocked gently. Kame turned towards the surprising sound and seeing Ueda, smiled widely waving to him in a greeting.

“Okaeri, Tat-chan!” Kazuya exclaimed happily and Tatsuya let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding - the guy seemed to be his usual self. At that moment he frowned wondering why he was worried - if Kamenashi had any problems it wasn’t his business anyway.

“Tadaima,” he muttered before stepping closer to the man. “What are you doing? You look weird when you concentrate on something so seriously.” Corners of Kame’s mouth moved up even more. A slight fidget of his body told Ueda that the other was actually excited.

“I’m taking polls,” Kazuya answered with a beam.

“Wait, what do you mean you’re ‘taking polls’?”

“I like polls so I like to answer in them.”

He lowered his head again to read another question. Ueda came a bit closer and looked at the paper to read its content. He blinked, eyebrows furrowing. The poll was about TV programs which was very strange. Everything would be okay with it if not for the fact that Kamenashi neither watched TV or had one in the first place. How someone could a take a poll about something he has no idea about?

“Why are you taking this poll? You don’t even have TV!” Ueda asked - normally he would just ignore the guy’s eccentric antics but it was simply too weird to ignore.

“I don’t need to watch TV to take this poll, Mr. Thief. I just honestly answer the question using my imagination. Here, for example: ‘What type of programs you dislike the most?’ I answered ‘news’ since I can read it in the newspaper or hear it on the radio. If I had a TV I would like to watch only interesting and relaxing shows and not news when all you can see are tragic or sad happenings.” Kazuya answered with complete innocence making Ueda stare at him with a blank expression - the man’s logic was amazing… in a wrong way.

Tatsuya turned around and walked out of the room leaving a puzzled Kame behind. The man, surprised by the thief’s behaviour, put the poll down and followed the older. He found him in the kitchen, slumped in the chair. He had his eyes closed. Kazuya could see the guy was tired and being a nice person he was, he decided to made a coffee for Ueda. The man seemed to like the way he made coffee so he was sure, Tatsuya would appreciate the gesture.

When the delicious smell of freshly brewed coffee reached him, he opened his eyes and looked around in surprise. He saw Kame, still wearing his glasses, pouring hot water into a big cup. Kazuya smiled to him while putting the cup in front of him. Unconsciously, Ueda smiled and thanked the man who beamed at him happily.

The rest of the evening was rather peaceful. Well, at least as peaceful as it could be with someone as energetic as Kamenashi Kazuya and his two hyperactive dogs that were climbing on Ueda every chance they got. And to Tastuya’s annoyance, Kazuya also wanted to climb on Ueda…
…to cuddle with him.

* * *

When Nakamaru appeared in front of Ueda, the man immediately dragged the boy to the nearest shop choosing for him a pair of fashionable jeans and a nice T-shirt. During that rather short shopping trip, Tatsuya asked Maru about his beatboxing talent. The boy blushed a bit but admitted that he indeed was good at it. Yuichi shivered at the smirk that blossomed on Ueda’s face at that moment - he knew the man just came up with a plan but he wasn’t sure he would like it.

“Okay. You know what? Getting that girl to date you will be easier than I thought. She likes you already, which’s a plus,” Tatsuya said and Nakamaru’s face visibly brightened. “Now you only need to ask her to date you and I know exactly how you can do it.” At that Maru paled and gulped heavily.

“W-what is it?” the boy stuttered, his hands becoming moist from nervous sweating.

“You have to beatbox for her,” Ueda said seriously while Yuichi’s eyes widened at the suggestion… scratch that - it was an order. “At the same time you will impress her and ask her to be your girlfriend. Not to mention you will get more popular at school.”

“Wait! You want me to perform in front of public?! Impossible! Completely impossible!” Nakamaru declined right away, suddenly freaked out. Ueda glared at the boy. He came closer and Maru gulped again, feeling as his legs started giving away under him.

“You will do it whether you want to or not.” The cold voice made the boy almost collapse but thankfully Ueda moved away from him. “You like that girl and she likes you too. Don’t be a coward! You’re just a step away from having a girlfriend. Wouldn’t it be good if she saw a cool side of you? Because with your clothes-style and your usual behavior… I’m really surprised any girl likes you,” Ueda added in a more friendly tone.

“B-but don’t t-they always say that l-look doesn’t matter but the h-heart and soul.”

“Well, that’s kind of a truth but in reality the first impression is what matters the most. You’re very lucky that a girl like her got to know you better after all. Don’t you think it would be bad to run away now? You really have a chance with her and who knows when a chance like that happens again. So? Are you in or will you pass and wait for a miracle?” Nakamaru stood frozen for a while. He was a bit lost but after thinking it over thoughtfully he nodded firmly. Ueda smirked in satisfaction - he couldn’t to see a show that would bring him victory…

* * *

For a next few days Ueda was helping Nakamaru with his performance. To Tatsuya’s delight, the boy really had talent when it came to beatboxing. He was sure the girl would be surprised and happy with the show as long as Nakamaru wouldn’t let his fears stop him. It was a hard task but with Ueda’s help Maru felt a bit more confident. The man had a sharp tongue and was rather irritated almost all the time so praise from him meant a lot to the teenager.

A week later, on a pier, a performance was supposed to take place. When Ueda arrived, all the equipment was already set and ready. The only thing missing was… the performer. Tatsuya asked the guys that were there to help them where Nakamaru was but no one saw him that day. Ueda cursed and started looking for the boy. He found him hiding behind Kamenashi’s booth. Kame was trying to coax Yuichi out but nothing seemed to work. He shrugged helplessly in Ueda’s direction while gesturing for the older man to help him.

Ueda sighted and crouched next to the freaked out boy.

“Why are you hiding? Your girl will be here soon.”

“I can’t, Ueda-san. I really can’t do it. It’s too much for me. You’re confident and… and strong while I am a nerd that everyone makes fun of. What if they won’t like it? What if I embarrass myself or her for that matter? I don’t want that,” he said quietly, hiding his face behind his hands.

“I will tell you something boy. When I was your age I was the same as you.” Yuichi looked up at him, it was obvious he didn’t believe him. “Okay, I had a pretty face but for the man it is… should be an insult.” He wanted to say ‘is’ but remembering Kamenashi’s happy face when he once said the man has a beautiful face, just to try to annoy him, made him change his mind. Apparently Kame didn’t mind being called ‘pretty’, on the contrary, he immediately jumped on Ueda asking him the same question as before: ‘do you like me?’, to which Ueda answer as always: ‘No, I don’t’.

“But you’re cool now. How’s it possible that you were like me back then?” Maru asked curiously.

“I was a geek. Every day of the week I was doing different after class activities. Piano, English, Math, sports… I was one of the smallest kids at school, I was kind of meek and an outsider at that. No one really liked me but everyone was making fun of me. And why? Because I was telling people I see fairies. I wanted to be popular but I choose the wrong way to do it. You have a chance to be popular for something you really can do. You should use it well. You have a unique talent and I’m sure everyone will like it.” Ueda smiled while putting a hand on Nakamaru’s shoulders. “And if they don’t, you shouldn’t care about it. You’re doing it for her, so only she should be important and the rest can go to hell.” Ueda smirked at that making the boy smile a bit. In the background Kazuya was nodding with a big smile. He agreed completely with what Ueda said.

Yuichi finally stood up. He was still a bit nervous but he wouldn’t be more ready to face his fears. Ueda patted him on the shoulder and they walked towards the improvised stage. Nakamaru’s crush was already there. She waved to the boy with a smile. He reciprocated the gesture and slowly walked up on stage. On his way he grabbed the microphone. He stopped in the middle of stage and looked in front of him. His hands started trembling slightly and he looked around searching for Ueda. The man gave him thumbs up and Maru nodded, fidgeting nervously.

Yuichi tried to greet the audience but a screech interrupted him. He bit on his lower lip but after clearing his throat, he tried again.

“Um… hi. I’m here today to show the girl I like my… um… cool side. Please, listen to it.”

He ended his short speech. He was mocked by some guy but Ueda shut him up before the guy could damage Nakamaru’s already low, self-esteem. The boy cleared his throat again and gestured to one of the musicians from school’s band to started playing. At first Nakamaru was only repeating the melody with his mouth but it was enough to make an impact on the audience. When he started to beatbox seriously, people got even more amazed by his skills.

The most important part of his performance was the moment he was supposed to ask the girl out. Ueda was a little afraid the guy will retreat in the last minute but, apparently, the cheers from the crowd made the boy forget about the fear for long enough to take it to the end. When the boy finished everyone was clapping while the girl ran on stage and hugged the boy. Nakamaru blushed furiously and stiffened at the contact. When the girl detached herself from him and congratulated him, he smiled sheepishly scratching his hand nervously. The girl giggled and kissed him on the cheek lightly. The boy blushed again but understood the gesture and shyly grabbed the girl’s hand.

Ueda watched them in amusement. His plan succeeded. Nakamaru got himself a girlfriend while Ueda won the challenge. He smirked at the thought, just wanting to rub it in Kamenashi’s face. He turned around, wanting to go back to the booth but stopped in surprise seeing a young seller standing just next to him. Kame was very happy seeing the teenagers together and couldn’t help smiling, clapping and bouncing. He calmed down only when the audience walked away and Yuichi and the girl got lost in the crowd.

“So… I won your challenge. Do you believe I’m a thief now?” Ueda asked this question even if he himself couldn’t find a single connection to his profession. But Kame was Kame - his way of thinking was something no normal person could understand. The man looked thoughtful, humming a bit to himself before looking at Ueda with a smile.

“I don’t believe you yet, Mr. Thief. You need to try harder.” Kamenashi turned around and started walking towards his booth. A dumbfounded Ueda who’s jaw already hit the floor, followed him closely behind.

“What?! But you said you will believe me if I complete your idiotic challenge!”

“Challenges. Not one challenge but a few.”

“What the…” Ueda asked in shock. “Are you kidding me?! Then what the fuck was that then?!” he gestured at the stage.

“It was the first challenge, that one was supposed to show if you’re smart enough to help Yuichi-kun with his crush. I still need to see if you’re as athletic as a thief. A robber who can’t even run away from the police isn’t a good robber, right?” He gave a man a dazzling smile. Ueda smacked himself. He should realize before that it wouldn’t be easy - the man was crazy from the beginning but he forgot about it.

Ueda started walking faster, his hands in his pockets while muttering profanities under his breath. He managed to pass Kazuya who stopped for a second in surprise before hurrying after the older with a big grin. He was able to keep up with an annoyed man, skipping happily next to him. Suddenly, the question came up, again.

“Ne~? Do you like me?” Ueda groaned and sped up his steps but Kame didn’t mind at all.

“No, I don’t!” Tatsuya answered angrily.

“Mou~ You’re mean~… But I’m sure you like me!”

“No, I don’t!”

“Yes, you do!”

“I don’t!”

“You do!”

“NO, I DON’T!!!” Ueda screamed and Kazuya stopped. He pouted, crossing his arms but soon he was smiling again happily at the sight of the man who walked up to the booth and started packing the boxes.

“He will like me anyway,” Kazuya said to himself with a smile before helping the other with boxes.
Ueda was packing stuff listening to the younger man’s humming. He was glad the guy didn’t talk. He had enough for the day and wanted some peace. When they came back to Kamenashi’s place, Ueda collapsed on the couch heavily while Kazuya walked to the kitchen. A few minutes later a nice smell of fresh coffee spread over the whole house making Tatsuya smile. He would never admit to it but he felt good here.

Maybe his ‘I don’t like you’ wasn’t as true as he thought… But who would think about it now, when a huge cup of delicious steaming coffee stood right in front of him, waiting for him to take the first sip. He lived with an annoying childish guy that hurt his pride but he never felt as much at home as now, in this place, with this man that made the best coffee in the entire world.