A piece of Kame for aqilahfilzah
Title: Three A.M.-No Place I’d Rather Be
Pairing/Group: PiKame
Rating/Warnings: PG-13, language
Summary: Sometimes you don’t know how alone you are until you need someone to help you.
Note:
Kamenashi Kazuya was bored. It was just before 1 am and he had 3 hours left on his shift at the local conbini. Kame was a college student who took his classes in the afternoon and evening so he could sleep in the early morning.
It was a Thursday night and he had already stocked the delivery, and was in the process of reading one of the store’s trashier magazines, being careful not to crease any of the pages or drop his late night snack on it. Business was slow, so he had nothing to do but sit there and read, maybe work on some assignments for school.
Thursdays were usually uneventful, except that the conbini was moderately close to the university, and the parties there started early before the weekend. Kame wasn’t cocky but he felt that he could handle just about anything. He endured the harassment of countless high school girls who just came in to stare at him. But that was early in his shift; usually they had to be home by 10 or 11pm. Then there were the late night workers, like himself, who were on break and wanted to talk for a minute before heading back. But the worst were the party boys, rich guys who bought case after case of beer with credit cards. They were always loud and obnoxious; some of them would even hit on him, like he had the words “easy bitch” tattooed on his forehead. Of course they didn’t get anywhere, but still they were annoying.
Kame heard the bells on the door chime and he looked up from the juicy tabloid he had been reading-something about idols and their antics-when he saw two guys about his own age walk into the store, laughing and jostling each other. Kame’s stomach clenched. Great, just what I need, he thought. One of them was a regular. He’d been showing up at about this time every night Kame worked for the last couple of weeks or so. All he ever bought was beer, and maybe the occasional pack of cigarettes, but even so, he would always spend about ten minutes walking around the store, glancing over at Kame from time to time. And then when he checked out he would always make some kind of sarcastic remark like how the fluorescent lighting really brought out the sparkle in Kame’s eyes. Kame could never really tell if the guy was actually trying to hit on him, or if he was just an asshole. This was the first time he’d ever come in with someone else, though.
“Irasshaimase,” Kame said with as little enthusiasm as possible. His boss Yamada-san was a real stickler about “conbini politeness” but Kame knew it was best not to encourage guys like this with too much courtesy.
“Is that him?” the friend half-whispered and half-spoke to Kame’s mystery stalker.
“Jin, shut the fuck up,” the guy told his friend. “Let’s just get the beer and go. The others are waiting.” He grabbed Jin by the shoulders and tried to drag him toward the coolers at the back of the store. But Jin wiggled out of his grasp and approached Kame at the counter.
“Sorry to bother you, but my friend Yamapi here, has been fantasizing about what it would be like to-“ Yamapi came up from behind and put his hand over Jin’s mouth to stop him from saying something obscene, but Jin kept talking and managed to muffle out, “Care to try and make that fantasy come true?”
“Excuse me?” was all Kame could muster while Jin burst out laughing. These guys were unbelievable. If it wouldn’t get him fired, Kame would have thrown them out. But Yamada-san always told him he had to put up with any kind of rudeness from customers because the customer was always right. Fucking bullshit.
Yamapi grabbed Jin’s shoulders again. “Jin, come on,” he said, “leave the guy alone. I’m sure he meets enough whack jobs on the overnight shift without adding your sorry ass name to the list.” Then he turned to Kame and said, “I’m sorry about this idiot. I’ll take care of him.”
“You better take care of me, Pi,” Jin said while making kissy faces at his friend, which only made him start laughing all over again.
Just before he pushed open the door to leave, Yamapi said over his shoulder, “Hey, maybe I’ll see you in class.”
“In class?” Kame asked.
“Yeah, we’re in Psych together on Tuesday afternoons. Well, I don’t often make it to class, but I remember you from the beginning of the semester.”
With that he left and Kame was left alone until a tipsy office worker stumbled in to buy some pain medication and a carton of milk a few minutes later. Most of the time, Kame really didn’t mind working at the conbini, but on nights like this, when he had to suffer assholes like them, he really wished he could quit and just concentrate on his studies. But there was no way he’d be able to afford his rent and his tuition on the small amount his family could give him.
The next night, Friday, was the busiest of the week. Kame was putting out the signage for the 2-for-1 onigiri sale at midnight, when the bells chimed. Kame looked up as he placed the pink neon cardboard sign next to the food case.
Kame was on guard as soon as the man entered the store. The man was about fifty and wore an ancient T-shirt and jeans that were dirty and worn at the bottom, frayed a bit. But what freaked Kame out the most was that he clasped his hands together in a strange way, sort of wringing them, constantly changing position, as if to relieve a ceaseless nervous tension. He walked all the way to the back of the conbini, and for a minute Kame lost sight of him and had to use the mirror. And when he looked into the mirror the stranger was staring right at him. Kame took a step back and bumped into the cigarettes. He wondered if he should call the police now, all he had to do was press a button and they would come. But the guy hadn’t done anything wrong; he was just acting strange. While Kame was thinking this, the man suddenly appeared in front of him. He pulled out a gun and pointed to the register. “All of it,” he said. As Kame was handing over the money, the stranger held the gun to Kame’s head. The tip of the gun felt cool against his skin.
The stranger whispered, “Are you the one?”
Kame could not respond, he did not know which answer would get him killed.
Kame closed his eyes as the man pulled the trigger. He expected to hear nothing. He expected to be dead. But instead he heard a small click.
“I guess not. Today must be your day then. Arigato.” And he left.
Kame slumped to the floor. He was shaking and his heart was beating wildly. He just stayed there for a while trying desperately to calm down. Again, he heard the familiar ring of the bells, and in his panicked state he realized that he had never pressed the button, the police weren’t coming.
Who was in the store right now? Was it the man with the gun? Did he come back?
Kame lowered himself even further so that his arms, legs, head-every part of him-was touching the floor. He was sweating now, and for the second time that night was truly afraid. He could hear footsteps getting closer and then walking past him. He heard doors opening and then the clink of bottles.
“Hey is anyone here?”
Kame recognized the voice. It was Yamapi, Pi, that guy from yesterday. He peered over the counter and looked down at Kame.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
Kame shook his head slightly.
“No, someone almost-he had a gun.”
At that Pi came around through the employee’s-only side and lifted Kame up off the ground. He was strong and surprisingly gentle.
“Did you call the police?” Pi asked worriedly.
“No, I got down on the ground and I was… I’m sorry, I’m a little out of it.”
“He robbed the store?” Pi asked looking for confirmation. Kame nodded. “Did he do anything else?” Pi looked for evidence like cuts and bruises.
“Listen, stop trying to be in charge of this. You don’t know anything. It only happened ten minutes ago. I thought you were him coming back.” Kame picked up his phone but his hands were still trembling.
Pi took it from him and dialed 110.
Kame stared blankly about. Everything seemed to be out of order. He hadn’t been paying proper attention to the store. There was a spill in the corner. Party boy was calling the police for him. He had completely lost control.
The police arrived sooner than Kame thought possible. After they heard Kame’s description of what happened, they wanted him to come down to the station so that he could look through some photos and maybe ID the guy or at least work with a sketch artist. The whole process took three hours, and afterward all Kame wanted was a bed, his own bed, but the idea of walking into his apartment alone was horrible to him.
The last person Kame thought he would see was Yamapi waiting for him in the station lobby.
“Have you been here the whole time?” Kame asked.
“Well, you don’t have a car and it’s late so…” Pi looked embarrassed, as if he had been caught doing something that he shouldn’t have. “Anyway, do you want a ride home?”
“Yeah, okay.”
When they arrived at the apartment, Kame could not get comfortable. Pi kept asking him questions as if he were in a hospital and Pi were some kind of nurse. Kame just wished he could go back in time where he could hate Pi and his friend, but that was hard to do when Pi was being so nice to him.
“I’m sorry that I keep asking you questions but this is the first time I have been here. Should you call someone, your family maybe?”
“They all live far away, and I don’t want to worry them.” Kame’s face suddenly tensed up, his brow furrowed. “Why were you at the conbini tonight? Last night you bought enough beer for the whole weekend.”
Pi looked away, embarrassed. “Um, I wanted to apologize for Jin again and maybe ask you out, you know, in a real way-no cheesy pick up lines this time.”
“Are you a stalker? Because tonight is the worst possible night for that kind of thing. I might be able to handle one tomorrow, but tonight is out of the question.”
“I love that even when you are terrified you are funny. Still, I don’t think you should be alone right now. Can I call someone, a neighbor?”
“No, there is no one. I have no one. I had a good friend that transferred last semester but I haven’t been able to find a replacement. It’s a little tough with my schedule to find new friends.”
“I can be a friend,” Pi said.
Kame could tell that he meant it.
“Well, considering all that you’ve done for me tonight you are the leading candidate. But I’m okay for now, you can go.”
“Are you sure? I can stick around.”
“No, go. Seriously, I’ll be fine.”
Pi left reluctantly. Kame did not go to sleep right away. He just sat in the middle of his bed and rocked back and forth a little. He did not want to have a nightmare. Even as he fought to stay awake, he knew it was a losing battle. Kame felt like his eyelids had weights in them, slowly they drooped down farther and farther, and right before he fell asleep he answered the question.
“I am not the one.”
Later that day, Kame did not go to school. It was the first time that he had missed a class since he had started college. He didn’t know what to do with himself, with so much time on his hands. So he obsessively watched the local news. There were one or two mentions of the conbini robbery. Kame learned that there had been four robberies at conbinis in the last two weeks-all involving the same suspect who was still at large.
That night, Kame tried to go to work. He stood on the subway platform watching train after train go by, until finally he got on one. A swirl of anxiety was building in him and he ended up turning around going back to his apartment. He called Yamada-san and told him that he wasn’t feeling well. He felt ashamed. Nothing had happened; he was fine. Why was this affecting him so much?
An hour later the doorbell rang.
“What are you doing here?” Kame asked when he opened the door and found Yamapi there.
“I stopped by the conbini and an older guy said you weren’t feeling well, so I decided to see how you are for myself.”
“So you just came by the apartment?”
Pi looked sheepish for a moment. “I don’t have your phone number. I don’t even know what to call you really. I only know your name and where you live but I was hoping to . . .”
Kame thought that Pi looked kind of cute flushed and stammering in his doorway, so he relaxed a little and let him inside.
“You can call me Kame. I didn’t go to work today. I tried but I couldn’t.”
“Well it just happened. You are expecting too much of yourself.”
“Do you ever have that problem, Yamapi? Can I call you that?”
“You can call me Pi, and what is that supposed to mean? Is pushing people away step one in operation of your defensive shield.”
“Are you a gamer as well?”
“How did you know?”
“You really know how to spend your time, don’t you?”
“Says the guy who has a ton of manga in his room.”
“You looked in my room?”
“Just a little. Listen, why don’t you get to know me instead of bashing my lifestyle?”
“I’m too busy trying to get over my trauma to date anyone right now, Mr. Sensitive.”
Pi laughed. “That was a joke, right? An attempt at a joke?”
“Seriously, I need to get back to work. I need the money. That is all I should be focused on right now.”
“Well, what if I help you?”
“How?”
“Well, your problem is anxiety, right? I could stay at the conbini with you. You know, like a goat that is a companion for horse.”
“Wait…Who is the goat in this scenario?”
“I am. I am the goat, the goat that keeps the horse calm. I learned about it on a show I watched about a farm,” Pi said proudly. “I watch a lot of TV.”
Kame rolled his eyes.
“And what do you get out of this except being with me and my charming personality?”
“You could help me study!” Pi said enthusiastically, as he hit upon a legitimate reason and was congratulating himself for it. “If I don’t pass the test next week, I might fail the course.”
“I’m so glad my near-death experience will be of use to you.”
“Near-death? I thought they just robbed the place. You never said anything about . . . well, I don’t want to remind you of it all now.”
Kame had forgotten that Pi had stood near the tea and coffee section while he talked to police at the conbini, and then he was in the lobby at the police station, and then they didn’t speak of it at Kame’s apartment later that night.
“He pulled the trigger, but there was no bullet in the chamber, it was an old gun. I was lucky.”
“Oh God, I’m sorry. You should talk to someone about this, really you should. I feel like an idiot. I didn’t even ask.”
“It’s alright. I have to go to sleep now, okay?” Kame told him. “But it would be great if you could come to class. And then my shift starts at 9pm.”
“Yeah, if you want me to be there, I will.”
“I don’t want to give you false hope,” Kame said.
“I don’t have any hope, any hope at all. Well, maybe just a little but I’ll keep that to myself.”
For the first time, Kame really looked at Pi. His soft beautiful face framed by his bangs, and he thought, “If this is the only good thing to come out of this shitty situation then I will take it.”
For the next five nights, Pi was pretty much glued to Kame’s side. He didn’t make a move on Kame, he just stayed with him like the good little goat he was supposed to be. Yamada-san never bothered to check the videotapes right away, but when he managed to find the time it was all on tape. The studying, yes, but also animated conversations involving a baseball or sometimes air guitar, plus ramen container bowling with onigiris as the bowling balls, cigarette tower Jenga, and candy toss into Pi’s mouth. Yamada-san recognized that Kame had been through a trauma, but this was too much. He did not yell at Kame. He just told him quietly that Pi had to go. The next night Kame broke the news to Pi.
“So you’re fine then?” Pi said.
“I feel great, just great, you can leave now.”
“Let me take a look around.”
“Why?”
“To see if you are telling me the truth. I’m just going to have a look at the 2-for-1 onigri signage. You know, we forgot to put it out yesterday. Maybe that is why your boss is so upset. Then I’ll go.”
Kame tried to stop him. “There is no need.”
Pi went to grab the sign and it fell apart in his hands.
“I’ll just help you make a new one,” Pi said brightly.
Kame bristled slightly, then he realized that he was still holding onto to edge of Pi’s shirt. It felt warm in his hand. He dropped it immediately.
“I think you should go,” Kame said softly.
Pi got closer to Kame pushing him up against the instant ramen, some of the containers fell off the shelves. “I know you are not okay and I can’t stand it. You look like shit. You’re not sleeping. I see you flinch every time the bell chimes. I’m not leaving you alone.”
“Why are you making a big deal out of this? You just spent a couple of nights keeping me company. I’m good. I’m over it. I don’t need you to be here anymore like a freaking babysitter.”
“Do you think that the one friend that you used to have would abandon you?”
“You have cared about me way more than he ever did,” Kame said honestly. “And he wasn’t just a friend.”
Pi was silent. He looked like he was letting that information sink in.
“Do you need to keep coming here?” he said finally. “It’s just a crappy job.”
“Well thanks, but to me this crappy job is helping me get a better future,” Kame said angrily. “I guess someone like you wouldn’t understand that.”
“Kame, that’s not what I meant. I just want to help you.”
“Please go, I need to be alone right now.” Kame turned around and pretended to stack some soda while Pi quietly walked away. Kame only heard a small jingling of the bells, a soft whoosh of the door, and Pi was gone.
Jin walked in a few nights later. He was alone. Kame could tell there was nothing needed to buy-no impulse items, no beer this time.
“What the hell did you say to him?” Jin complained. “He’s been moping around for three days. I’ve been trying to get him to come here but he says he doesn’t want to bother you.”
“Maybe you should switch tactics,” Kame said swallowing hard. “Tell him to find someone else, tell him not to see me.”
“If that is what you want, I will happily steer him in another direction,” Jin said. “But I don’t think that’s best for either of you.
“What I want doesn’t matter. I like him, I like him a lot, but I almost got shot and then I almost got fired. It’s been a busy week.”
“Look, all I know is that for some crazy reason that I don’t understand, you make Pi happy. He was pretty much into you from the first moment he saw you, and then once he got to know you, he fell hard. I think we both know that carefree laughing Pi can put sunshine in your day when it’s raining-but this sad lovesick Pi-I can’t take it. Yesterday he was drunk at a party, and he kept going on about a goat and a horse; it was pathetic. The sooner we can fix this the better. Here’s his number; I think you should give him a call-as soon as possible,” Jin added.
“I’ll think about it,” Kame said.
Kame held onto Pi’s number for another week. The time did not pass quickly. Kame began having nightmares; sometimes he would be killed, sometimes Pi, sometimes the both of them. They became so frequent that he made an appointment to see a counselor at school. He also had dreams about Pi that had nothing to do with the robbery-he didn’t need to talk to anyone about them.
The truth was, he missed Pi. He missed the way he laughed, the way he felt at ease whenever Pi was near. But they came from very different backgrounds, and besides that, Kame was so high-maintenance that Pi was sure to run out of patience sooner or later.
Two weeks after the robbery, Kame finally found the courage to give it a try. He dialed Pi’s number, his heartbeat quickened.
“Moshi moshi,” he heard Pi say.
“It’s Kame”
“Hi, um I’m a little busy right now. Could you call me later?”
“Sure,” Kame said, disappointed. He put his hand down on the counter and it landed on a thumbtack. Kame had just been about to hang up the onigiri sign again. It startled him so much he dropped his phone, and it broke into four pieces.
“I guess I will call you back later,” Kame said sullenly.
Just after that a news story broke through the boring music he was forced to listen to over the conbini loud speakers.
“Another shooting has taken place at a conbini in the northern district. This time, police were on the scene and fired ten shots at the suspect who drew his weapon at the conbini clerk. The assailant has now been pronounced dead. The condition of others at the scene has not been reported.”
Kame turned the radio up, he wanted to hear more of the story if they broke through the broadcast again, and he also turned on the TV, which is why he didn’t hear the bells ring out when Pi burst through the doors followed by Jin.
“Kame!” Pi shouted.
Kame looked up startled. “I’m okay! I’m okay!” he shouted back.
Pi’s face was full of worry and fear. He once again came around the employee-only side. This time he embraced Kame. “Your phone went dead and then we heard it over the radio. We thought it was you.”
“No, that’s a couple of blocks away. They were staking it out because it hadn’t been hit the last time. I hope the clerk is okay.”
Jin was on his phone, “They just reported that no one else was hurt,” He said.
“Why couldn’t I talk to you before?” Kame asked.
“Jin thought I should play hard to get.”
“Jin’s an idiot.”
“Hey, I’m right here,” Jin said.
“Can I kiss you now?” Pi asked.
“Can’t, the cameras,” Kame said a bit out of breath, “But I really want to.”
“Oh, go ahead,” Jin muttered as he stood in front of the couple and opened a very large newspaper.
Yamada-san’s only comment was that he should have bought the newspaper before he started reading.
The end.
Pairing/Group: PiKame
Rating/Warnings: PG-13, language
Summary: Sometimes you don’t know how alone you are until you need someone to help you.
Note:
Kamenashi Kazuya was bored. It was just before 1 am and he had 3 hours left on his shift at the local conbini. Kame was a college student who took his classes in the afternoon and evening so he could sleep in the early morning.
It was a Thursday night and he had already stocked the delivery, and was in the process of reading one of the store’s trashier magazines, being careful not to crease any of the pages or drop his late night snack on it. Business was slow, so he had nothing to do but sit there and read, maybe work on some assignments for school.
Thursdays were usually uneventful, except that the conbini was moderately close to the university, and the parties there started early before the weekend. Kame wasn’t cocky but he felt that he could handle just about anything. He endured the harassment of countless high school girls who just came in to stare at him. But that was early in his shift; usually they had to be home by 10 or 11pm. Then there were the late night workers, like himself, who were on break and wanted to talk for a minute before heading back. But the worst were the party boys, rich guys who bought case after case of beer with credit cards. They were always loud and obnoxious; some of them would even hit on him, like he had the words “easy bitch” tattooed on his forehead. Of course they didn’t get anywhere, but still they were annoying.
Kame heard the bells on the door chime and he looked up from the juicy tabloid he had been reading-something about idols and their antics-when he saw two guys about his own age walk into the store, laughing and jostling each other. Kame’s stomach clenched. Great, just what I need, he thought. One of them was a regular. He’d been showing up at about this time every night Kame worked for the last couple of weeks or so. All he ever bought was beer, and maybe the occasional pack of cigarettes, but even so, he would always spend about ten minutes walking around the store, glancing over at Kame from time to time. And then when he checked out he would always make some kind of sarcastic remark like how the fluorescent lighting really brought out the sparkle in Kame’s eyes. Kame could never really tell if the guy was actually trying to hit on him, or if he was just an asshole. This was the first time he’d ever come in with someone else, though.
“Irasshaimase,” Kame said with as little enthusiasm as possible. His boss Yamada-san was a real stickler about “conbini politeness” but Kame knew it was best not to encourage guys like this with too much courtesy.
“Is that him?” the friend half-whispered and half-spoke to Kame’s mystery stalker.
“Jin, shut the fuck up,” the guy told his friend. “Let’s just get the beer and go. The others are waiting.” He grabbed Jin by the shoulders and tried to drag him toward the coolers at the back of the store. But Jin wiggled out of his grasp and approached Kame at the counter.
“Sorry to bother you, but my friend Yamapi here, has been fantasizing about what it would be like to-“ Yamapi came up from behind and put his hand over Jin’s mouth to stop him from saying something obscene, but Jin kept talking and managed to muffle out, “Care to try and make that fantasy come true?”
“Excuse me?” was all Kame could muster while Jin burst out laughing. These guys were unbelievable. If it wouldn’t get him fired, Kame would have thrown them out. But Yamada-san always told him he had to put up with any kind of rudeness from customers because the customer was always right. Fucking bullshit.
Yamapi grabbed Jin’s shoulders again. “Jin, come on,” he said, “leave the guy alone. I’m sure he meets enough whack jobs on the overnight shift without adding your sorry ass name to the list.” Then he turned to Kame and said, “I’m sorry about this idiot. I’ll take care of him.”
“You better take care of me, Pi,” Jin said while making kissy faces at his friend, which only made him start laughing all over again.
Just before he pushed open the door to leave, Yamapi said over his shoulder, “Hey, maybe I’ll see you in class.”
“In class?” Kame asked.
“Yeah, we’re in Psych together on Tuesday afternoons. Well, I don’t often make it to class, but I remember you from the beginning of the semester.”
With that he left and Kame was left alone until a tipsy office worker stumbled in to buy some pain medication and a carton of milk a few minutes later. Most of the time, Kame really didn’t mind working at the conbini, but on nights like this, when he had to suffer assholes like them, he really wished he could quit and just concentrate on his studies. But there was no way he’d be able to afford his rent and his tuition on the small amount his family could give him.
The next night, Friday, was the busiest of the week. Kame was putting out the signage for the 2-for-1 onigiri sale at midnight, when the bells chimed. Kame looked up as he placed the pink neon cardboard sign next to the food case.
Kame was on guard as soon as the man entered the store. The man was about fifty and wore an ancient T-shirt and jeans that were dirty and worn at the bottom, frayed a bit. But what freaked Kame out the most was that he clasped his hands together in a strange way, sort of wringing them, constantly changing position, as if to relieve a ceaseless nervous tension. He walked all the way to the back of the conbini, and for a minute Kame lost sight of him and had to use the mirror. And when he looked into the mirror the stranger was staring right at him. Kame took a step back and bumped into the cigarettes. He wondered if he should call the police now, all he had to do was press a button and they would come. But the guy hadn’t done anything wrong; he was just acting strange. While Kame was thinking this, the man suddenly appeared in front of him. He pulled out a gun and pointed to the register. “All of it,” he said. As Kame was handing over the money, the stranger held the gun to Kame’s head. The tip of the gun felt cool against his skin.
The stranger whispered, “Are you the one?”
Kame could not respond, he did not know which answer would get him killed.
Kame closed his eyes as the man pulled the trigger. He expected to hear nothing. He expected to be dead. But instead he heard a small click.
“I guess not. Today must be your day then. Arigato.” And he left.
Kame slumped to the floor. He was shaking and his heart was beating wildly. He just stayed there for a while trying desperately to calm down. Again, he heard the familiar ring of the bells, and in his panicked state he realized that he had never pressed the button, the police weren’t coming.
Who was in the store right now? Was it the man with the gun? Did he come back?
Kame lowered himself even further so that his arms, legs, head-every part of him-was touching the floor. He was sweating now, and for the second time that night was truly afraid. He could hear footsteps getting closer and then walking past him. He heard doors opening and then the clink of bottles.
“Hey is anyone here?”
Kame recognized the voice. It was Yamapi, Pi, that guy from yesterday. He peered over the counter and looked down at Kame.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
Kame shook his head slightly.
“No, someone almost-he had a gun.”
At that Pi came around through the employee’s-only side and lifted Kame up off the ground. He was strong and surprisingly gentle.
“Did you call the police?” Pi asked worriedly.
“No, I got down on the ground and I was… I’m sorry, I’m a little out of it.”
“He robbed the store?” Pi asked looking for confirmation. Kame nodded. “Did he do anything else?” Pi looked for evidence like cuts and bruises.
“Listen, stop trying to be in charge of this. You don’t know anything. It only happened ten minutes ago. I thought you were him coming back.” Kame picked up his phone but his hands were still trembling.
Pi took it from him and dialed 110.
Kame stared blankly about. Everything seemed to be out of order. He hadn’t been paying proper attention to the store. There was a spill in the corner. Party boy was calling the police for him. He had completely lost control.
The police arrived sooner than Kame thought possible. After they heard Kame’s description of what happened, they wanted him to come down to the station so that he could look through some photos and maybe ID the guy or at least work with a sketch artist. The whole process took three hours, and afterward all Kame wanted was a bed, his own bed, but the idea of walking into his apartment alone was horrible to him.
The last person Kame thought he would see was Yamapi waiting for him in the station lobby.
“Have you been here the whole time?” Kame asked.
“Well, you don’t have a car and it’s late so…” Pi looked embarrassed, as if he had been caught doing something that he shouldn’t have. “Anyway, do you want a ride home?”
“Yeah, okay.”
When they arrived at the apartment, Kame could not get comfortable. Pi kept asking him questions as if he were in a hospital and Pi were some kind of nurse. Kame just wished he could go back in time where he could hate Pi and his friend, but that was hard to do when Pi was being so nice to him.
“I’m sorry that I keep asking you questions but this is the first time I have been here. Should you call someone, your family maybe?”
“They all live far away, and I don’t want to worry them.” Kame’s face suddenly tensed up, his brow furrowed. “Why were you at the conbini tonight? Last night you bought enough beer for the whole weekend.”
Pi looked away, embarrassed. “Um, I wanted to apologize for Jin again and maybe ask you out, you know, in a real way-no cheesy pick up lines this time.”
“Are you a stalker? Because tonight is the worst possible night for that kind of thing. I might be able to handle one tomorrow, but tonight is out of the question.”
“I love that even when you are terrified you are funny. Still, I don’t think you should be alone right now. Can I call someone, a neighbor?”
“No, there is no one. I have no one. I had a good friend that transferred last semester but I haven’t been able to find a replacement. It’s a little tough with my schedule to find new friends.”
“I can be a friend,” Pi said.
Kame could tell that he meant it.
“Well, considering all that you’ve done for me tonight you are the leading candidate. But I’m okay for now, you can go.”
“Are you sure? I can stick around.”
“No, go. Seriously, I’ll be fine.”
Pi left reluctantly. Kame did not go to sleep right away. He just sat in the middle of his bed and rocked back and forth a little. He did not want to have a nightmare. Even as he fought to stay awake, he knew it was a losing battle. Kame felt like his eyelids had weights in them, slowly they drooped down farther and farther, and right before he fell asleep he answered the question.
“I am not the one.”
Later that day, Kame did not go to school. It was the first time that he had missed a class since he had started college. He didn’t know what to do with himself, with so much time on his hands. So he obsessively watched the local news. There were one or two mentions of the conbini robbery. Kame learned that there had been four robberies at conbinis in the last two weeks-all involving the same suspect who was still at large.
That night, Kame tried to go to work. He stood on the subway platform watching train after train go by, until finally he got on one. A swirl of anxiety was building in him and he ended up turning around going back to his apartment. He called Yamada-san and told him that he wasn’t feeling well. He felt ashamed. Nothing had happened; he was fine. Why was this affecting him so much?
An hour later the doorbell rang.
“What are you doing here?” Kame asked when he opened the door and found Yamapi there.
“I stopped by the conbini and an older guy said you weren’t feeling well, so I decided to see how you are for myself.”
“So you just came by the apartment?”
Pi looked sheepish for a moment. “I don’t have your phone number. I don’t even know what to call you really. I only know your name and where you live but I was hoping to . . .”
Kame thought that Pi looked kind of cute flushed and stammering in his doorway, so he relaxed a little and let him inside.
“You can call me Kame. I didn’t go to work today. I tried but I couldn’t.”
“Well it just happened. You are expecting too much of yourself.”
“Do you ever have that problem, Yamapi? Can I call you that?”
“You can call me Pi, and what is that supposed to mean? Is pushing people away step one in operation of your defensive shield.”
“Are you a gamer as well?”
“How did you know?”
“You really know how to spend your time, don’t you?”
“Says the guy who has a ton of manga in his room.”
“You looked in my room?”
“Just a little. Listen, why don’t you get to know me instead of bashing my lifestyle?”
“I’m too busy trying to get over my trauma to date anyone right now, Mr. Sensitive.”
Pi laughed. “That was a joke, right? An attempt at a joke?”
“Seriously, I need to get back to work. I need the money. That is all I should be focused on right now.”
“Well, what if I help you?”
“How?”
“Well, your problem is anxiety, right? I could stay at the conbini with you. You know, like a goat that is a companion for horse.”
“Wait…Who is the goat in this scenario?”
“I am. I am the goat, the goat that keeps the horse calm. I learned about it on a show I watched about a farm,” Pi said proudly. “I watch a lot of TV.”
Kame rolled his eyes.
“And what do you get out of this except being with me and my charming personality?”
“You could help me study!” Pi said enthusiastically, as he hit upon a legitimate reason and was congratulating himself for it. “If I don’t pass the test next week, I might fail the course.”
“I’m so glad my near-death experience will be of use to you.”
“Near-death? I thought they just robbed the place. You never said anything about . . . well, I don’t want to remind you of it all now.”
Kame had forgotten that Pi had stood near the tea and coffee section while he talked to police at the conbini, and then he was in the lobby at the police station, and then they didn’t speak of it at Kame’s apartment later that night.
“He pulled the trigger, but there was no bullet in the chamber, it was an old gun. I was lucky.”
“Oh God, I’m sorry. You should talk to someone about this, really you should. I feel like an idiot. I didn’t even ask.”
“It’s alright. I have to go to sleep now, okay?” Kame told him. “But it would be great if you could come to class. And then my shift starts at 9pm.”
“Yeah, if you want me to be there, I will.”
“I don’t want to give you false hope,” Kame said.
“I don’t have any hope, any hope at all. Well, maybe just a little but I’ll keep that to myself.”
For the first time, Kame really looked at Pi. His soft beautiful face framed by his bangs, and he thought, “If this is the only good thing to come out of this shitty situation then I will take it.”
For the next five nights, Pi was pretty much glued to Kame’s side. He didn’t make a move on Kame, he just stayed with him like the good little goat he was supposed to be. Yamada-san never bothered to check the videotapes right away, but when he managed to find the time it was all on tape. The studying, yes, but also animated conversations involving a baseball or sometimes air guitar, plus ramen container bowling with onigiris as the bowling balls, cigarette tower Jenga, and candy toss into Pi’s mouth. Yamada-san recognized that Kame had been through a trauma, but this was too much. He did not yell at Kame. He just told him quietly that Pi had to go. The next night Kame broke the news to Pi.
“So you’re fine then?” Pi said.
“I feel great, just great, you can leave now.”
“Let me take a look around.”
“Why?”
“To see if you are telling me the truth. I’m just going to have a look at the 2-for-1 onigri signage. You know, we forgot to put it out yesterday. Maybe that is why your boss is so upset. Then I’ll go.”
Kame tried to stop him. “There is no need.”
Pi went to grab the sign and it fell apart in his hands.
“I’ll just help you make a new one,” Pi said brightly.
Kame bristled slightly, then he realized that he was still holding onto to edge of Pi’s shirt. It felt warm in his hand. He dropped it immediately.
“I think you should go,” Kame said softly.
Pi got closer to Kame pushing him up against the instant ramen, some of the containers fell off the shelves. “I know you are not okay and I can’t stand it. You look like shit. You’re not sleeping. I see you flinch every time the bell chimes. I’m not leaving you alone.”
“Why are you making a big deal out of this? You just spent a couple of nights keeping me company. I’m good. I’m over it. I don’t need you to be here anymore like a freaking babysitter.”
“Do you think that the one friend that you used to have would abandon you?”
“You have cared about me way more than he ever did,” Kame said honestly. “And he wasn’t just a friend.”
Pi was silent. He looked like he was letting that information sink in.
“Do you need to keep coming here?” he said finally. “It’s just a crappy job.”
“Well thanks, but to me this crappy job is helping me get a better future,” Kame said angrily. “I guess someone like you wouldn’t understand that.”
“Kame, that’s not what I meant. I just want to help you.”
“Please go, I need to be alone right now.” Kame turned around and pretended to stack some soda while Pi quietly walked away. Kame only heard a small jingling of the bells, a soft whoosh of the door, and Pi was gone.
Jin walked in a few nights later. He was alone. Kame could tell there was nothing needed to buy-no impulse items, no beer this time.
“What the hell did you say to him?” Jin complained. “He’s been moping around for three days. I’ve been trying to get him to come here but he says he doesn’t want to bother you.”
“Maybe you should switch tactics,” Kame said swallowing hard. “Tell him to find someone else, tell him not to see me.”
“If that is what you want, I will happily steer him in another direction,” Jin said. “But I don’t think that’s best for either of you.
“What I want doesn’t matter. I like him, I like him a lot, but I almost got shot and then I almost got fired. It’s been a busy week.”
“Look, all I know is that for some crazy reason that I don’t understand, you make Pi happy. He was pretty much into you from the first moment he saw you, and then once he got to know you, he fell hard. I think we both know that carefree laughing Pi can put sunshine in your day when it’s raining-but this sad lovesick Pi-I can’t take it. Yesterday he was drunk at a party, and he kept going on about a goat and a horse; it was pathetic. The sooner we can fix this the better. Here’s his number; I think you should give him a call-as soon as possible,” Jin added.
“I’ll think about it,” Kame said.
Kame held onto Pi’s number for another week. The time did not pass quickly. Kame began having nightmares; sometimes he would be killed, sometimes Pi, sometimes the both of them. They became so frequent that he made an appointment to see a counselor at school. He also had dreams about Pi that had nothing to do with the robbery-he didn’t need to talk to anyone about them.
The truth was, he missed Pi. He missed the way he laughed, the way he felt at ease whenever Pi was near. But they came from very different backgrounds, and besides that, Kame was so high-maintenance that Pi was sure to run out of patience sooner or later.
Two weeks after the robbery, Kame finally found the courage to give it a try. He dialed Pi’s number, his heartbeat quickened.
“Moshi moshi,” he heard Pi say.
“It’s Kame”
“Hi, um I’m a little busy right now. Could you call me later?”
“Sure,” Kame said, disappointed. He put his hand down on the counter and it landed on a thumbtack. Kame had just been about to hang up the onigiri sign again. It startled him so much he dropped his phone, and it broke into four pieces.
“I guess I will call you back later,” Kame said sullenly.
Just after that a news story broke through the boring music he was forced to listen to over the conbini loud speakers.
“Another shooting has taken place at a conbini in the northern district. This time, police were on the scene and fired ten shots at the suspect who drew his weapon at the conbini clerk. The assailant has now been pronounced dead. The condition of others at the scene has not been reported.”
Kame turned the radio up, he wanted to hear more of the story if they broke through the broadcast again, and he also turned on the TV, which is why he didn’t hear the bells ring out when Pi burst through the doors followed by Jin.
“Kame!” Pi shouted.
Kame looked up startled. “I’m okay! I’m okay!” he shouted back.
Pi’s face was full of worry and fear. He once again came around the employee-only side. This time he embraced Kame. “Your phone went dead and then we heard it over the radio. We thought it was you.”
“No, that’s a couple of blocks away. They were staking it out because it hadn’t been hit the last time. I hope the clerk is okay.”
Jin was on his phone, “They just reported that no one else was hurt,” He said.
“Why couldn’t I talk to you before?” Kame asked.
“Jin thought I should play hard to get.”
“Jin’s an idiot.”
“Hey, I’m right here,” Jin said.
“Can I kiss you now?” Pi asked.
“Can’t, the cameras,” Kame said a bit out of breath, “But I really want to.”
“Oh, go ahead,” Jin muttered as he stood in front of the couple and opened a very large newspaper.
Yamada-san’s only comment was that he should have bought the newspaper before he started reading.
The end.