First of all, Severus Snape. Because I'm equally gorgeous and the bravest man ever of our pasts we both are mean and kind of misanthropic persons.
Or not, because I can't remember what was said about Severus in the books - my views have changed after reading fanfiction.
lbeth 's reply made me laugh and I'm going to copy it here: "EDWARD CULLEN! For I am a socially retarded virgin vampire. Oh yes, I am."
True, true, that's me as well. Also, the... umm, bipolarity: "Don't come here, I will kill you! I love you, come here! I'm dangerous to you, go away! I can't live without yoouuuuuuuhhh! THIS - IS - THE - SKIN - OF - A - KILLER! Arrgh don't leave MEHHH!"
...and Eeyore, because I'm a pessimist and so forth.