In my family, I am the oldest and my next in age sibling is 2 years younger. Although there was not as much blatant favoritism, she and my Mom were very close and my Mom and I mostly did not get along at least until I was much older. This sister used to act bitchy to me as well to the point that other people noticed and it was clear that we did not get along. And I was pretty tired of it. I read an article about how we bring our childhood relationships into adulthood. That the same rivalries that we had as kids is what we are doing as adults. She would do A and I would always do B. So I just stopped reacting; if you are being treated badly just not putting up with it. If they are looking for a reaction not giving it. If she wasn't your siter you would not put up with it. I had a similar thing with my Mom. Things changed when I convinced myself that their opinions of me really did not matter; that I had my own life they had no control over. My Mom used to tell my I was gullible and let people take advantage of me. Now this was me just being myself and being helpful/nice to people and it has helped me a lot. So one day I told her how I was helping someone with the expected reactions of her telling me off. But I was laughing cause I was fine with what I was doing. My aunt was there and ws like..why do you tell her that..I laughed and said she needs to get it out of her system. Hugs
Although there was not as much blatant favoritism, she and my Mom were very close and my Mom and I mostly did not get along at least until I was much older.
This sister used to act bitchy to me as well to the point that other people noticed and it was clear that we did not get along. And I was pretty tired of it.
I read an article about how we bring our childhood relationships into adulthood. That the same rivalries that we had as kids is what we are doing as adults. She would do A and I would always do B. So I just stopped reacting; if you are being treated badly just not putting up with it. If they are looking for a reaction not giving it. If she wasn't your siter you would not put up with it.
I had a similar thing with my Mom. Things changed when I convinced myself that their opinions of me really did not matter; that I had my own life they had no control over. My Mom used to tell my I was gullible and let people take advantage of me. Now this was me just being myself and being helpful/nice to people and it has helped me a lot. So one day I told her how I was helping someone with the expected reactions of her telling me off. But I was laughing cause I was fine with what I was doing. My aunt was there and ws like..why do you tell her that..I laughed and said she needs to get it out of her system.
Hugs
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