*FLAIL*
I WILL NEVER FINISH THIS GODDAMN CHAPTER. I am chapter challenged, okay? I've, like, got to that point where I don't even believe what I'm saying anymore, and who am I to say anything ANYWAY, and omg, what the fucking fuck, and my dissertation advisor is going to dump me like a bad habit and I WILL BE ALL ALONE AND NEVER GET MY DEGREE AND SAYING "WOULD YOU LIKE FRIES WITH THAT?" and it will be all death and pain and everything and why is the Doctor regenerating has the Doctor regenerated and I am all just GAH.
I was thinking about Ianto's death vs. Ten's and how there's no fix-it for Ten because the whole show IS a fix it, and that means that the loss can't be undone, because it exists, period; in the act of fixing... they made it, well... fixed. He's dead, that's it, period, end of story -- ironically, because the story doesn't end, ever. We have to put our faith in the show to heal us, we can't make it up ourselves.*
I feel like I have no skin on.
YOU GUYS. I am just a BIG MESS and I don't know what to do?
*I mean, there's Handy, I guess. But it's not like we made that up either. It was all Them.
I was thinking about Ianto's death vs. Ten's and how there's no fix-it for Ten because the whole show IS a fix it, and that means that the loss can't be undone, because it exists, period; in the act of fixing... they made it, well... fixed. He's dead, that's it, period, end of story -- ironically, because the story doesn't end, ever. We have to put our faith in the show to heal us, we can't make it up ourselves.*
I feel like I have no skin on.
YOU GUYS. I am just a BIG MESS and I don't know what to do?
*I mean, there's Handy, I guess. But it's not like we made that up either. It was all Them.