For Fresno! Onwards, valiant soldiers!
I am in search of a good cold-conducting chillifying skin-and-muscle-temperature-lowering icepack unit. Flist, do you have recommendations? Don't tell me Coldpac - I already forked over forty dollars for one of their wraps, and while it gave me aforementioned cold burns on my skin (that, five weeks later, are just now starting to fade - my right ankle still looks like it was given a skin-ablating pedicure with napalm and then sandblasted for good measure), it did not, in fact, actually chill the muscles and tissue underneath my skin, and I understand from my physical therapist that the chilling of tissue beneath the skin is the most important part.
In fact, I have a long rant up and coming about this, because I now, as a result of events that I will not iterate in today's entry, am forced to ice both my right ankle AND left knee, and I cannot find anything that keeps either cold enough for twenty minutes at a time. My physical therapist says that just using ice is best, but I'm sorry, no. Filling a Ziploc bag with ice cubes is 1) unwieldy, 2) time consuming and 3) DOES NOT KEEP MY SHIT COLD ENOUGH. I am tempted to boom-boom-pow the MARQUIS DE DOULEUR in the jaw with adamantium escrima sticks and then hand him a Ziploc back full of crushed ice and ask him to field test its efficacy and get back to me.
I have a feeling that the only way my lust for chilling my ankle and knee will be sated is if Reed Richards builds me a device that lets me teleport just those body parts to Antarctica for twenty minutes thrice daily for a nice dose of Freeze the Body Part for Great Healing. Surely this is not beyond the reach of Mr. Fantastic?!
Anyway.
I started to watch The Tudors yesterday after resisting it for...two plus seasons now.
I do not give a flying coitus about Jonathan Rhys Meyers, but my oh my is Henry Cavill some eye candy. Unfortunately, I find my attention...wandering. I'm the absolute target demographic for period costume pieces - if it's set before 1850 and there are men running around in doubloons and/or lace, I will almost ALWAYS try to watch it. Yet not even Henry Cavill smack talking some chick's father after being found in flagrante delicto with her was enough to keep my eyes glued to the screen - I kept wandering off to try to find episodes of The Brave and the Bold.
I also finally partook of the remake of Brideshead Revisited and was given even further confirmation that 1) Matthew Goode has a smexalicious mouth and 2) I continue to not give a crap about Ben Whishaw and 3) I continue to not give a crap about films dealing with the angst of wealthy gay men at Oxford in the early 20th century. Oh, Ben Whishaw was tolerable enough in the film, I just kept expecting him to collapse into a singularity of mannerisms in the absence of a coherent performance.
But none of this is the reason why I am here today.
No. I am here today because, internets, you might want to stop and memory this entry as I am about to utter (er...type) words that I never, EVER thought would pass my lips/digits.
IGN has a preview up of New Avengers #54. While I now never go out of my way to read a comic by Brian Michael Bendis unless I'm feeling particularly masochistic, it is worth a look for the following two reasons:
1. The new Sorceror Supreme is revealed.
2. Billy Tan is KNOCKING IT OUT OF THE BALLPARK in the art on this issue. "Gorgeous" does not begin to describe how consummately beautiful this art is.
There are spoilers below. Major, major spoilers.
SPOILERS AHOY! NO, REALLY!
Ready?
LOOK AT THIS GODDAMN PAGE:
Okay, look. Yes, the dialog's an awkward mess, Bendis shouldn't be allowed to touch anything to do with magical or cosmic characters in the MU because he lacks the imagination and eloquence to do those characters justice, it's still totally stupid that Stephen Strange somehow feels unworthy of being the Sorceror Supreme, but if this is the real deal? GODDAMN, to say that I failed to see this coming would be, um, an understatement.
One more spoilery panel:
So. Pretteh. So pretteh. Brother Voodoo and the Eye of Agamotto? As above, if this pans out? If this isn't a fakeout of some kind?
Well played, Bendis. Well played. <-- Yes, I actually just typed that. QUICK, QUICK, TAKE A PICTURE!!
As if that weren't enough to melt your sclera, CBR has a preview of Guardians of the Galaxy #15 up.
Guardians of the Galaxy -- and War of Kings, for that matter -- is a continuity clusterviolation. Abnett & Lanning can't decide on what Heather's costume is going to be, they don't write Adam Warlock that well (uh, yeah, the last time I checked Adam was one of the biggest cosmic heavies to ever heavy), they sure as hell can't write Ronan the Accuser, and if Abnett & Lanning knew their Black Bolt, they'd know that War of Kings would, in all rights, be over within 00.00027 seconds as soon as Black Bolt arrived on scene. Any scene. When Blackagar arrives? Fight = over.
But, in GotG #15, we get this glorious three-way melee with the Imperial Guard, the Inhumans, and the Guardians, and...I can't help but love it, because the book is so hysterically and irresistably funny.
Like this:
And this:
Yes, that bottom panel is Lockjaw and Cosmo. Yes, Abnett & Lanning have just -- and I'm gonna call it right now -- created the SINGLE GREATEST PANEL in the history of sequential literature.
Here's the part of the entry where I rage in capslock at all of you.
PARK CHAN-WOOK HAS JUST MADE A VAMPIRE FILM AND NONE OF YOU THOUGHT TO TELL ME?
FIRED. YOU ALL ARE SO. FIRED.
Fired. Fired.
(I am deeply amused that Richard Corliss is calling this Park Chan-wook's "most mature" work yet - was there something about Oldboy that wasn't?)
Red band trailer here. Yep, that is most definitely a Park Chan-wook film.
In Real Actual History News: National Geographic has a lovely new article up about the glory days of the Khmer Empire and Angkor Wat.
The really cool thing?
The 3D tour of a digitally realized Angkor Wat in its heyday. Beautiful!
By the way, Ain't It Cool has, like, a zillion new previews up. Of note is the Dark Reign: Dark Wolverine preview wherein it is established that Daken, Stabbinating Mohawk-and-Ironic-Drivechain-Sporting Son of Wolverine...
...wait for it, wait for it...
...is not just a garden variety bisexual. No, he's a bisexual incubus.
Oh, Marvel.
In fact, I have a long rant up and coming about this, because I now, as a result of events that I will not iterate in today's entry, am forced to ice both my right ankle AND left knee, and I cannot find anything that keeps either cold enough for twenty minutes at a time. My physical therapist says that just using ice is best, but I'm sorry, no. Filling a Ziploc bag with ice cubes is 1) unwieldy, 2) time consuming and 3) DOES NOT KEEP MY SHIT COLD ENOUGH. I am tempted to boom-boom-pow the MARQUIS DE DOULEUR in the jaw with adamantium escrima sticks and then hand him a Ziploc back full of crushed ice and ask him to field test its efficacy and get back to me.
I have a feeling that the only way my lust for chilling my ankle and knee will be sated is if Reed Richards builds me a device that lets me teleport just those body parts to Antarctica for twenty minutes thrice daily for a nice dose of Freeze the Body Part for Great Healing. Surely this is not beyond the reach of Mr. Fantastic?!
Anyway.
I started to watch The Tudors yesterday after resisting it for...two plus seasons now.
I do not give a flying coitus about Jonathan Rhys Meyers, but my oh my is Henry Cavill some eye candy. Unfortunately, I find my attention...wandering. I'm the absolute target demographic for period costume pieces - if it's set before 1850 and there are men running around in doubloons and/or lace, I will almost ALWAYS try to watch it. Yet not even Henry Cavill smack talking some chick's father after being found in flagrante delicto with her was enough to keep my eyes glued to the screen - I kept wandering off to try to find episodes of The Brave and the Bold.
I also finally partook of the remake of Brideshead Revisited and was given even further confirmation that 1) Matthew Goode has a smexalicious mouth and 2) I continue to not give a crap about Ben Whishaw and 3) I continue to not give a crap about films dealing with the angst of wealthy gay men at Oxford in the early 20th century. Oh, Ben Whishaw was tolerable enough in the film, I just kept expecting him to collapse into a singularity of mannerisms in the absence of a coherent performance.
But none of this is the reason why I am here today.
No. I am here today because, internets, you might want to stop and memory this entry as I am about to utter (er...type) words that I never, EVER thought would pass my lips/digits.
IGN has a preview up of New Avengers #54. While I now never go out of my way to read a comic by Brian Michael Bendis unless I'm feeling particularly masochistic, it is worth a look for the following two reasons:
1. The new Sorceror Supreme is revealed.
2. Billy Tan is KNOCKING IT OUT OF THE BALLPARK in the art on this issue. "Gorgeous" does not begin to describe how consummately beautiful this art is.
There are spoilers below. Major, major spoilers.
SPOILERS AHOY! NO, REALLY!
Ready?
LOOK AT THIS GODDAMN PAGE:
Okay, look. Yes, the dialog's an awkward mess, Bendis shouldn't be allowed to touch anything to do with magical or cosmic characters in the MU because he lacks the imagination and eloquence to do those characters justice, it's still totally stupid that Stephen Strange somehow feels unworthy of being the Sorceror Supreme, but if this is the real deal? GODDAMN, to say that I failed to see this coming would be, um, an understatement.
One more spoilery panel:
So. Pretteh. So pretteh. Brother Voodoo and the Eye of Agamotto? As above, if this pans out? If this isn't a fakeout of some kind?
Well played, Bendis. Well played. <-- Yes, I actually just typed that. QUICK, QUICK, TAKE A PICTURE!!
As if that weren't enough to melt your sclera, CBR has a preview of Guardians of the Galaxy #15 up.
Guardians of the Galaxy -- and War of Kings, for that matter -- is a continuity clusterviolation. Abnett & Lanning can't decide on what Heather's costume is going to be, they don't write Adam Warlock that well (uh, yeah, the last time I checked Adam was one of the biggest cosmic heavies to ever heavy), they sure as hell can't write Ronan the Accuser, and if Abnett & Lanning knew their Black Bolt, they'd know that War of Kings would, in all rights, be over within 00.00027 seconds as soon as Black Bolt arrived on scene. Any scene. When Blackagar arrives? Fight = over.
But, in GotG #15, we get this glorious three-way melee with the Imperial Guard, the Inhumans, and the Guardians, and...I can't help but love it, because the book is so hysterically and irresistably funny.
Like this:
And this:
Yes, that bottom panel is Lockjaw and Cosmo. Yes, Abnett & Lanning have just -- and I'm gonna call it right now -- created the SINGLE GREATEST PANEL in the history of sequential literature.
Here's the part of the entry where I rage in capslock at all of you.
PARK CHAN-WOOK HAS JUST MADE A VAMPIRE FILM AND NONE OF YOU THOUGHT TO TELL ME?
FIRED. YOU ALL ARE SO. FIRED.
Fired. Fired.
(I am deeply amused that Richard Corliss is calling this Park Chan-wook's "most mature" work yet - was there something about Oldboy that wasn't?)
Red band trailer here. Yep, that is most definitely a Park Chan-wook film.
In Real Actual History News: National Geographic has a lovely new article up about the glory days of the Khmer Empire and Angkor Wat.
The really cool thing?
The 3D tour of a digitally realized Angkor Wat in its heyday. Beautiful!
By the way, Ain't It Cool has, like, a zillion new previews up. Of note is the Dark Reign: Dark Wolverine preview wherein it is established that Daken, Stabbinating Mohawk-and-Ironic-Drivechain-Sporting Son of Wolverine...
...wait for it, wait for it...
...is not just a garden variety bisexual. No, he's a bisexual incubus.
Oh, Marvel.