i was made for chasing dreams
well, sean left tuesday. although they weren’t great, the “surprise” parties were still a success and that’s all that matters. we all walked away with pictures and memories. sean came to visit me at work before he was leaving. he held me for a long time in the parking lot and i didn’t want to let go. it just felt so good to be in his arms. i didn’t cry and i was really proud of myself for that. we said our goodbyes then he went home to finish packing. his recruiter picked him up then he stayed in some hotel in nyc so they could keep track of everyone and get them rounded up before they leave. i’m sure they didn’t want anyone dipping. they were bussed out to newark airport yesterday. we texted and talked before he got on his flight and i couldn’t help but cry then. i am just sad. sean arrived in st. louis around 7pm. i got one last text around 9 saying he loves me, then i knew he finally got to fort leonard wood and that communication was officially cut off. i will be checking my mail for his letters and will relay news on to others. ive been reading journals from soldiers in basic training. it is so intense. i feel bad for sean but this is something he wanted to do and we will both be better for it. i am going to save up my money to go out to missouri for family day/his graduation ceremony in september. i talked to seans dad yesterday too, we had a good conversation, much needed. i’m happy we had it. ive been trying to stay busy to keep my mind off everything. i miss him so much already. i love him to death so its normal to have heart ache. i’m trying to be positive and remind myself itll be over soon and i’ll get to see him in a little bit… and how great its going to be when we first see each other again, how physically and mentally strong he’ll be, how grateful, polite and respectful… all those things the military does to a man. he will be surprised when he sees me too. i’m going to let my hair grow out, not cutting it, plus i’ve started working out again, more intensely so I hope to look much better for his return. itll be great and i can’t wait. if we can get through this, we can get through anything. that day though, i cannot wait for the day i get to see him again. absence makes the heart grow fonder.
something interesting:
my parents received an invitation to my dad’s coworker’s wedding. matt is getting married next month in connecticut at the spa at norwich inn. very nice place. i’d love to go. after skimming the invitation, i remembered that my boss, sharon, in new york is also getting married in connecticut next month. jason and i joked about crashing her wedding and stuff. i looked over the invitation again and saw “RSVP to mr. and mrs. wolfe” then I saw “sharon and matthew’s wedding.” i practically fell of the couch! my dad’s cowoker is getting married to my boss in nyc! i IMed her yesterday and said congratulations on your upcoming wedding, blah blah blah, then i told her that their invitation came in the mail at my house and she said, “OMG you’re bob matthews’s daughter?! i can’t believe it! matt is going to flip! i’ve been hearing about your dad for years…” hahahahah! this shit is just too fucking hilarious. what are the odds of my dad being good friends with my boss’s fiancee? we’ve known matt pretty long and he was dating sharon at that time as well, we just had no idea that she would end up being my supervisor. now i feel like we have a weird connection. i don’t know if my rents are going attend their wedding… they’d have to drive to norwich, pay for a hotel for three days minimum, all after we come back from vacation. its selfish, but i want them to go so i can see pictures and hear about everything.
system of a down just came on my satellite radio and i can't help but think of sean. it so weird not having him around. he's the one going through training, not me, basic plus heartache. i have it easy compared to him. i only have one. these few months will be hard but well worth it. i'm just going to start doing things for myself. i need to do some self-rewarding, and i need to get out a little more and be more independent. when he comes back ill be an improved liz. i am excited to show him who i'm going to become. thats about all that has been going on in my life. everything else has pretty much been the same except my minor changes here and there. i feel like i'm growing up a lot and dealing with life better. ive also been more social than i've ever been, talking to more people at work, school, and when i'm around other people i don't open up to. my goal this summer and before seans return is to become more extraverted. so far so good.
depite my lonliness, sadness, and worry for sean, i am considerably happy and dealing well. i guess that is all i really have to add.
something interesting:
my parents received an invitation to my dad’s coworker’s wedding. matt is getting married next month in connecticut at the spa at norwich inn. very nice place. i’d love to go. after skimming the invitation, i remembered that my boss, sharon, in new york is also getting married in connecticut next month. jason and i joked about crashing her wedding and stuff. i looked over the invitation again and saw “RSVP to mr. and mrs. wolfe” then I saw “sharon and matthew’s wedding.” i practically fell of the couch! my dad’s cowoker is getting married to my boss in nyc! i IMed her yesterday and said congratulations on your upcoming wedding, blah blah blah, then i told her that their invitation came in the mail at my house and she said, “OMG you’re bob matthews’s daughter?! i can’t believe it! matt is going to flip! i’ve been hearing about your dad for years…” hahahahah! this shit is just too fucking hilarious. what are the odds of my dad being good friends with my boss’s fiancee? we’ve known matt pretty long and he was dating sharon at that time as well, we just had no idea that she would end up being my supervisor. now i feel like we have a weird connection. i don’t know if my rents are going attend their wedding… they’d have to drive to norwich, pay for a hotel for three days minimum, all after we come back from vacation. its selfish, but i want them to go so i can see pictures and hear about everything.
system of a down just came on my satellite radio and i can't help but think of sean. it so weird not having him around. he's the one going through training, not me, basic plus heartache. i have it easy compared to him. i only have one. these few months will be hard but well worth it. i'm just going to start doing things for myself. i need to do some self-rewarding, and i need to get out a little more and be more independent. when he comes back ill be an improved liz. i am excited to show him who i'm going to become. thats about all that has been going on in my life. everything else has pretty much been the same except my minor changes here and there. i feel like i'm growing up a lot and dealing with life better. ive also been more social than i've ever been, talking to more people at work, school, and when i'm around other people i don't open up to. my goal this summer and before seans return is to become more extraverted. so far so good.
depite my lonliness, sadness, and worry for sean, i am considerably happy and dealing well. i guess that is all i really have to add.