FIC: All the first time business
Title: All the first time business
Pairing: J2
Rating: PG-15
Summary: Jensen hates first times. Written in his POV
Warings: None
Beta: Awesome maritx
Disclaimer: Lies. All lies
Word count: 1070
A/N: This was originaly written for my dear friend Defencelaura and the little Magic one of her. Hope you´ll like it, hon.
And... be warned, this is my first fic in English. Any criticisms, comments are welcomed - but please, be kind...
I hate all the first time business.
Uneasiness, embarrassment, insecurity, long silence, blushing.
There should be only second times. Or third times. Whatever.
For the first time I saw him, I really wondered if this could be any good.
In the very moment his huge image with overgrowth hair caught my eyes I knew it was too much.
Too much of everything.
He was all big, white teeth shiny smile, mischievously sparkling hazel eyes, constantly happy bouncing kid.
And I really, really don’t know how to deal with kids. Don’t mention puppy eyes. Not a word.
First time he hugged me with those large freaking paws of his, I stiffed in surprise. He climbed me like I was some fucking tree or something and told me ”what the fuck, dude” with an easy smile.
I don’t like talk too much normally, but hey, at least I could say hi. Or morning. Anything. Instead I hugged him back with shaking hands and plain: ”Huh.”
I know what personal space is and long ago I learned to respect it. I expect other people to respect it.
But not a chance with Jared.
First time we hit the bar together I figured out Jared was some kind of human atomic bomb. Simply he was everywhere.
Smiling, talking, touching, joking, drinking.
I was trying to get myself together, but whoa, no goddamn chance with Jared. Again.
”Jen, common, one more shot. Be a man, dude. Let’s show this people we can celebrate. Have a fun”.
And just like that I gave up.
Afterwards all I could remember was twinkling brown eyes and dimples. Yeah, fucking dimples.
And, ouch, of course The headache.
Fuck him, fuck him once more.
For the first time I crushed in his place on the too short couch, I woke with wet dog breath on my face. I knew I was doomed.
Harley was licking my nose enthusiastically and after I opened my eyes disgusted Jared was offering huge grin. ”He simply loves you, Jen.”
”Son of a bitch”, I muttered under my breath. But Jared only grinned wider and brought me some breakfast.
And, oh sweet heaven, there was strong black coffee. A lot of coffee.
Maybe I was doomed but I kinda like it too.
First time he checked me out I thought what the fuck?
He was staring like he has never seen me before. Eyes wide, flushed cheeks, hands restlessly rubbing his hair.
I thought what the fuck again and then I got it. Hey, I don’t exactly know what I did there. I forgot it all ‘cause of his look.
It burned me.
Maybe I was gasping at him and whimpering: ”Jay?”
Maybe. No fucking idea.
But Jared blinked twice and the other moment was gone. I slowly leaned against the wall for support. Shaking.
Shaking?
Fuck. I finally got it.
Oh my god.
First time we kissed it was a mess. Teeth and tongue, rush breath, dry lips and wrong angle, all too fast.
But oh so hot. It scared me how hot it was. Jared was hugging me tight to prevent my escape and claimed my mouth quickly. I felt like everything but escape.
I saw hidden fear of rejection in those big eyes, tension of his body under my hands, slight shivering of his lips. One moment he hesitated.
I saw him and then I opened up. Myself.
I let him take me, I let him feel me.
I kissed him back. Just like that. And I meant it.
First time we were having fight I thought it was over.
Jared stormed out of my trailer curses on his constantly smiling lips. He didn’t smile anymore.
I was yelling at him, Jared was yelling at me, and I punched the wall beside his head.
The reason was stupid, correction I was stupid, but I couldn’t brink myself admit I was simply jealous.
Because of Chad. No fucking way.
That guy was an annoying freak of nature who ruined everything once was good.
I couldn’t even look at Jared later. I didn’t wanna see his disappointed face, his anger. But then he caught me staring anyway and all I could see in his brown eyes was sadness.
And I don’t know how it happened - one time I was sitting on chair on the other side of the room and the other I was kissing him desperately.
And you know what he did?
He muttered: ”Jen, you fool”, and kissed me as well.
Oh, thanks god!
First time we fucked we didn’t fuck at all.
Jared treated me like I was made of glass and every rougher movement could break me apart.
His huge hands were touching my face, my whole body, so carefully I couldn’t bite back a moan. I was kissing him, biting him, squeezing him and finally, finally he gave up.
He claimed me. In that moment he possessed everything - my breath, my mouth, my brain - my whole being.
He entered my body, and god, it fucking hurt at first, but then he mapped my skin with hot tongue whispering dark nonsense to my throat while his hips were thrusting.
Jared was holding me like I was the last or maybe the first thing on the entire world and burned every single touch to my screaming skin.
In the darkness he was cursing my name with such sweet desperate tone I could only buck my hips up and beg for more. More. More please, more.
And than there was no way I could take more.
I rather swallowed my screams of Jared’s name and kissed him instead. All feelings, all pleas, all thoughts, and every moan of pleasure I was giving him in that kiss.
I arched my body feeling him everywhere and then all around us stilled.
We were together and in that moment I knew we got it.
In that moment we were making love.
Fuck.
Uhm. Yeah. That too.
I still hate all that first time business.
Uneasiness, embarrassment, insecurity, long silence, blushing.
Yeah, I really do.
But I know that, with no doubt, I will treasure first times with Jared till the very end. And maybe longer. It’s that easy.
Because it’s Jared.
Because it’s… Love.
For the first time in my life.
END
Pairing: J2
Rating: PG-15
Summary: Jensen hates first times. Written in his POV
Warings: None
Beta: Awesome maritx
Disclaimer: Lies. All lies
Word count: 1070
A/N: This was originaly written for my dear friend Defencelaura and the little Magic one of her. Hope you´ll like it, hon.
And... be warned, this is my first fic in English. Any criticisms, comments are welcomed - but please, be kind...
I hate all the first time business.
Uneasiness, embarrassment, insecurity, long silence, blushing.
There should be only second times. Or third times. Whatever.
For the first time I saw him, I really wondered if this could be any good.
In the very moment his huge image with overgrowth hair caught my eyes I knew it was too much.
Too much of everything.
He was all big, white teeth shiny smile, mischievously sparkling hazel eyes, constantly happy bouncing kid.
And I really, really don’t know how to deal with kids. Don’t mention puppy eyes. Not a word.
First time he hugged me with those large freaking paws of his, I stiffed in surprise. He climbed me like I was some fucking tree or something and told me ”what the fuck, dude” with an easy smile.
I don’t like talk too much normally, but hey, at least I could say hi. Or morning. Anything. Instead I hugged him back with shaking hands and plain: ”Huh.”
I know what personal space is and long ago I learned to respect it. I expect other people to respect it.
But not a chance with Jared.
First time we hit the bar together I figured out Jared was some kind of human atomic bomb. Simply he was everywhere.
Smiling, talking, touching, joking, drinking.
I was trying to get myself together, but whoa, no goddamn chance with Jared. Again.
”Jen, common, one more shot. Be a man, dude. Let’s show this people we can celebrate. Have a fun”.
And just like that I gave up.
Afterwards all I could remember was twinkling brown eyes and dimples. Yeah, fucking dimples.
And, ouch, of course The headache.
Fuck him, fuck him once more.
For the first time I crushed in his place on the too short couch, I woke with wet dog breath on my face. I knew I was doomed.
Harley was licking my nose enthusiastically and after I opened my eyes disgusted Jared was offering huge grin. ”He simply loves you, Jen.”
”Son of a bitch”, I muttered under my breath. But Jared only grinned wider and brought me some breakfast.
And, oh sweet heaven, there was strong black coffee. A lot of coffee.
Maybe I was doomed but I kinda like it too.
First time he checked me out I thought what the fuck?
He was staring like he has never seen me before. Eyes wide, flushed cheeks, hands restlessly rubbing his hair.
I thought what the fuck again and then I got it. Hey, I don’t exactly know what I did there. I forgot it all ‘cause of his look.
It burned me.
Maybe I was gasping at him and whimpering: ”Jay?”
Maybe. No fucking idea.
But Jared blinked twice and the other moment was gone. I slowly leaned against the wall for support. Shaking.
Shaking?
Fuck. I finally got it.
Oh my god.
First time we kissed it was a mess. Teeth and tongue, rush breath, dry lips and wrong angle, all too fast.
But oh so hot. It scared me how hot it was. Jared was hugging me tight to prevent my escape and claimed my mouth quickly. I felt like everything but escape.
I saw hidden fear of rejection in those big eyes, tension of his body under my hands, slight shivering of his lips. One moment he hesitated.
I saw him and then I opened up. Myself.
I let him take me, I let him feel me.
I kissed him back. Just like that. And I meant it.
First time we were having fight I thought it was over.
Jared stormed out of my trailer curses on his constantly smiling lips. He didn’t smile anymore.
I was yelling at him, Jared was yelling at me, and I punched the wall beside his head.
The reason was stupid, correction I was stupid, but I couldn’t brink myself admit I was simply jealous.
Because of Chad. No fucking way.
That guy was an annoying freak of nature who ruined everything once was good.
I couldn’t even look at Jared later. I didn’t wanna see his disappointed face, his anger. But then he caught me staring anyway and all I could see in his brown eyes was sadness.
And I don’t know how it happened - one time I was sitting on chair on the other side of the room and the other I was kissing him desperately.
And you know what he did?
He muttered: ”Jen, you fool”, and kissed me as well.
Oh, thanks god!
First time we fucked we didn’t fuck at all.
Jared treated me like I was made of glass and every rougher movement could break me apart.
His huge hands were touching my face, my whole body, so carefully I couldn’t bite back a moan. I was kissing him, biting him, squeezing him and finally, finally he gave up.
He claimed me. In that moment he possessed everything - my breath, my mouth, my brain - my whole being.
He entered my body, and god, it fucking hurt at first, but then he mapped my skin with hot tongue whispering dark nonsense to my throat while his hips were thrusting.
Jared was holding me like I was the last or maybe the first thing on the entire world and burned every single touch to my screaming skin.
In the darkness he was cursing my name with such sweet desperate tone I could only buck my hips up and beg for more. More. More please, more.
And than there was no way I could take more.
I rather swallowed my screams of Jared’s name and kissed him instead. All feelings, all pleas, all thoughts, and every moan of pleasure I was giving him in that kiss.
I arched my body feeling him everywhere and then all around us stilled.
We were together and in that moment I knew we got it.
In that moment we were making love.
Fuck.
Uhm. Yeah. That too.
I still hate all that first time business.
Uneasiness, embarrassment, insecurity, long silence, blushing.
Yeah, I really do.
But I know that, with no doubt, I will treasure first times with Jared till the very end. And maybe longer. It’s that easy.
Because it’s Jared.
Because it’s… Love.
For the first time in my life.
END