(no subject)

[kakelina682]

I miss you guys. Slipped away, but coming back to stable ground. Sometimes we need to hit ultimate lows to get to the top again. I can start to see the perspective again from the top...its coming really slowly, but I know I'll get there. I want a pure life again. I want to stop playing and making stupid mistakes. I want to focus on why I'm here, find beauty and joy in Christ in what he's given me. Not in depths of an impure abyss that I have found myself in. This isn't me. I don't know when things changed. When I became this person. It was slowly over last year. Too much freedom. I don't want to be another stupid college girl statistic. I want to be something better. I want to be something special- preparing myself for that person I meet, for when I see God's face and I can stand in strength in front of him. Preparing myself for a career, using all my abilities that he has given me. Being the best person that I can be, so that when I meet that person I spend the rest of my life with, I will be worthy of him. So my children can be proud of me, so in turn I can be proud of them.
Remember when you said that you were Rachel from Friends, Christy was Phoebe, and I was Monica? Ha that popped into my head the other day and it made me giggle. What a random group of girls, but it worked. I hope we can all meet someday and catch up. I miss being with you guys on the stage. Where the most we had to worry about was having our lines memorized, Klem's latest blog and whether we had a date to prom or not. That was a really good year and I thank you girls for it.
Audition tomorrow. Send some strength and confidence vibes if you have any to spare!