(no subject)
1. no matter how you live your life it's always going to be a rollercoaster, and theres really nothing anyone can do about it. even though it keeps shooting down, some how it just finds its way back up again, and when it gets up theres no stopping it, feels good to finally say something like this.
2. i havent been getting any sleep what so ever latley and its been slowing me down and giving me the ugliest bags under my eyes, i know they make something for it, so i'm going to have to look into that. with this, i've been falling asleep at 7 and then waking up at 12 or 3 in the morning and not being able to get back to sleep. last night i was supposed to hang out with brittney and i ended up getting out of work, comming home, laying down, and then all i remember is falling alseep and i did this to her two nights in a row, i feel like an idioit, im sorry.
3. since my dad kicked me out, my mom has been taking care of me. im hoping to move in with her soon and just have us complete mother and daughter. shes been helping me out with my school, which im attending Middlesex in january and i will be taking phsycology, so pumped on that. i really couldnt ask for a better mother, she really is a hero. without her i really wouldnt know what i would do with myself, pretty self explainitory. i love you mom, your everything a daughter can truley ask for, thank you.
4.with school, ill be attending Middlesex for 8-12 years, its a long time but i know i can make it through to complete my goal. the reason for this is because i want to be able to diagnos and give out prescriptions to my patients, next thing you know ill be your phsycologist helping you out with your problems, garenteed.
5. pretty soon ill be heading to another part of the counrty and living with my bestfriend for a while. england is where i want to be at this point in time. im really hoping brittney is going to be able to get her ticket and figure everything out with her house over in england, this way i wont leave her here and have her just fly over seas with me, two of my bestestfriends in an amazing, beautiful country, nothing more to ask for. just the begining of october, and i'll be heading out of here.
6. i'm getting paler then ever, i need to getting my ass taning again, im sick of looking and feeling uncomfortable with myself, it sucks.
7. i really need to get my hair done, but im scared to take any off because its finally growing longer then it has in so long. its about 3-4 inches passed my collar bones, feels good to actually have hair on my head. i just cant wait to get the coloring and cut done to it.
8. i need to start watching my weight more and what i eat. havent been really doing that because how stressed out ive been. i dont want to go back how i was, feeling fat all the time and just worrying about my looks and how im going to look in clothes. i work out every morning and night about 60-80 crunches and side swopes, its been working out for me, but i need to do more. i hope i can maintain this.
9. work has been getting better, but i think i need to start looking for a new job. one that pays every week and one i cant actually work 40 hours within a week. i need better pay, more money. i want to go shopping and get new clothes for myself, havent done that in some time and i really need to. i got to start watching what i spend my money on and start saving more of it up. this whole money situation is hard and being a teenager just isnt making it any better. but ill get there, most of my money is going to england, my car insurance, and just bills i have to pay, more then ever; gas. money should grow on trees, but if it did there would be none left in this world. the whole working experience, it reallly does it for you, but how else would you get the money you need.
10. everything has been going perfect between me and him, seriously no other word to describe. i mean we have our bickerments like we are married but we talked it through and that talk really made a dfference. im actually getting back to the happy that i used to be, im hoping it stays. everything with my friends are pretty much just alright. me and my close friends are doing good, but theres a select few who i just dont know if i can trust anymore. im just sick of people talking all this stupid immature bullshit about some one else, or a group of people, wanting to kill them, and then the next moment you know they are bestfriends with them hanging out every day, yeah its pretty much complete bullshit and i really dont know if i want anything to do with that kind of people. we will see what happens, no promises though.
11. FYI: my 19th birthday is now in 19 days and counting. better be getting me something really good.
RIP Samantha Grimard & Bryan Willet a.k.a Smokes. your lives were taking from us at too young of an age. this shouldnt have ever happened to two really good people. im sorry i never got to say goodbye, im sorry this ever happened. your memories will forever be with us, and your soul and spirit will always be in our hearts. god bless you both, and may the light lead your way.
8.29.07, you will never be forgotten.
2. i havent been getting any sleep what so ever latley and its been slowing me down and giving me the ugliest bags under my eyes, i know they make something for it, so i'm going to have to look into that. with this, i've been falling asleep at 7 and then waking up at 12 or 3 in the morning and not being able to get back to sleep. last night i was supposed to hang out with brittney and i ended up getting out of work, comming home, laying down, and then all i remember is falling alseep and i did this to her two nights in a row, i feel like an idioit, im sorry.
3. since my dad kicked me out, my mom has been taking care of me. im hoping to move in with her soon and just have us complete mother and daughter. shes been helping me out with my school, which im attending Middlesex in january and i will be taking phsycology, so pumped on that. i really couldnt ask for a better mother, she really is a hero. without her i really wouldnt know what i would do with myself, pretty self explainitory. i love you mom, your everything a daughter can truley ask for, thank you.
4.with school, ill be attending Middlesex for 8-12 years, its a long time but i know i can make it through to complete my goal. the reason for this is because i want to be able to diagnos and give out prescriptions to my patients, next thing you know ill be your phsycologist helping you out with your problems, garenteed.
5. pretty soon ill be heading to another part of the counrty and living with my bestfriend for a while. england is where i want to be at this point in time. im really hoping brittney is going to be able to get her ticket and figure everything out with her house over in england, this way i wont leave her here and have her just fly over seas with me, two of my bestestfriends in an amazing, beautiful country, nothing more to ask for. just the begining of october, and i'll be heading out of here.
6. i'm getting paler then ever, i need to getting my ass taning again, im sick of looking and feeling uncomfortable with myself, it sucks.
7. i really need to get my hair done, but im scared to take any off because its finally growing longer then it has in so long. its about 3-4 inches passed my collar bones, feels good to actually have hair on my head. i just cant wait to get the coloring and cut done to it.
8. i need to start watching my weight more and what i eat. havent been really doing that because how stressed out ive been. i dont want to go back how i was, feeling fat all the time and just worrying about my looks and how im going to look in clothes. i work out every morning and night about 60-80 crunches and side swopes, its been working out for me, but i need to do more. i hope i can maintain this.
9. work has been getting better, but i think i need to start looking for a new job. one that pays every week and one i cant actually work 40 hours within a week. i need better pay, more money. i want to go shopping and get new clothes for myself, havent done that in some time and i really need to. i got to start watching what i spend my money on and start saving more of it up. this whole money situation is hard and being a teenager just isnt making it any better. but ill get there, most of my money is going to england, my car insurance, and just bills i have to pay, more then ever; gas. money should grow on trees, but if it did there would be none left in this world. the whole working experience, it reallly does it for you, but how else would you get the money you need.
10. everything has been going perfect between me and him, seriously no other word to describe. i mean we have our bickerments like we are married but we talked it through and that talk really made a dfference. im actually getting back to the happy that i used to be, im hoping it stays. everything with my friends are pretty much just alright. me and my close friends are doing good, but theres a select few who i just dont know if i can trust anymore. im just sick of people talking all this stupid immature bullshit about some one else, or a group of people, wanting to kill them, and then the next moment you know they are bestfriends with them hanging out every day, yeah its pretty much complete bullshit and i really dont know if i want anything to do with that kind of people. we will see what happens, no promises though.
11. FYI: my 19th birthday is now in 19 days and counting. better be getting me something really good.
RIP Samantha Grimard & Bryan Willet a.k.a Smokes. your lives were taking from us at too young of an age. this shouldnt have ever happened to two really good people. im sorry i never got to say goodbye, im sorry this ever happened. your memories will forever be with us, and your soul and spirit will always be in our hearts. god bless you both, and may the light lead your way.
8.29.07, you will never be forgotten.