The World Walkers: Quiar: Mothar: Takara: The Missionary (part 3)
Part 1
Part 2
Kamen smiled. “My priestess readily admits she has no connection to the fae and I think that makes her the right person to be in the position she is. She’s read everything that the priests and priestess before her have written about the religion that they created around someone who they’ve never met before, because the Motharan religion is based on the worship of the fae, but they realised that it didn’t matter whether they knew him once or not. We worship Emrys because he created Quiar. Even though there are those, I’ve heard, who argue that we can’t possible know for certain that he did, I believe the stories that were passed down from the first generation of Quiarans.”
“Those who are said to have met him.”
“Exactly. We have copies of their journals as well, from the time he came to visit, and I don’t think they’re stories. I can see why some people would - the idea of someone creating a world is hard enough to accept, but with the other fae he made a whole Web of worlds.” Kamen shook his head. “Yet it feels like the truth.”
“I’d like to see them.” Takara smiled. “We do have copies but they aren’t shared. They belong to the priest and he doesn’t want us to damage them in any way, which is understandable, although I’ve always thought the best way of solving that issue is to get a number of them made in order that we can read their words as well.” She remembered the argument one of her fellow missionaries, who had gone missing no long after, had had with the priest. “It’s our job to teach people about our religion and I don’t feel, now, like we even really understand what it is.”
“Sometimes I don’t understand what your religion is either,” Kamen admitted. “When your missionary explained it to me, as she saw it, it made more sense than it does now, and I can’t help thinking that she wasn’t passing on the word of her priest, the way missionaries are supposed to. I think she was telling me what she believed, instead of what the priest believed, so when I came here I was disappointed.” He sipped his tea, looking thoughtful. “Most converts find themselves disappointed. We come here, wanting to be a part of your hame, and then we’re placed in these settlements with very little chance of ever talking with someone who isn’t from our home hame. I’m glad you made the choice to visit us, otherwise I might have returned home too, feeling as though I was a failure when really it is the failure of the priests and priestesses of Mothar.”
Once that would have made Takara angry. She didn’t want anyone to think of her priest as a failure, but she was beginning to realise that he was. He shouldn’t be a priest if he didn’t truly believe that the fae had once existed, had, at the very least, created Quiar and the races of the world, and the only reason he was was because his father had been priest before him. It wasn’t a nice realisation and yet it wasn’t once she wished she’d never had. A part of her did, of course, but mostly she was grateful that she had come to understand who he was at such a young age. At least she wasn’t one of her parents, or grandparents, who did still accept his word as gospel.
“We’re going to have the most chance of getting through to the younger Motharans,” Takara said, unsure whether she should make her own religion when there were already so many of them. “If I write about the fae as the Moonjumpers know them, about what they were doing when they were creating the Web, I think it’s something we could give to other priests and priestesses - the ones who truly believe in the fae.”
“You’re right.” Kamen nodded, glancing down at the table before looking back at her. “Meeting a Moonjumper was pure luck and it’s not something that would happen to every Motharan missionary, so I think that’s something we need to make the most of, as well as learning more about the many religions of Mothar.” He sipped his tea. “We’re in a difficult position, because this town is more rigid than others, and I have a feeling that we would find everything easier if we lived elsewhere, although it’s not easy for any of the converts to gain acceptance from your hame.”
“I’m sorry.” Kamen opened his mouth and she knew he was going to tell her to stop apologising for things that weren’t her fault. “Kamen, I know, but that doesn’t mean I can’t apologise for the way my people have treated you and the other converts. We’re wrong to act the way we do and we need to start working out how we’re going to bring the converts together with the rest of the hame. It’s not going to be easy, there are going to be people arguing against us, and I know that it’s going to take time. Probably longer than we’re both alive. That doesn’t matter to me, as long as we make a good beginning, because I want things to change.”
“They need to change.” Nodding once more, he sipped his tea, and Takara looked down at her own mug to find that at some point she’d finished hers, although she didn’t remember actually drinking it. “Some converts really aren’t happy with the way they’re treated and one day it’s going to end up with them turning against your priest, at the very least. It’s something I don’t want to happen, but I don’t think I’d be able to stop it if it does happen.”
As Takara poured herself another mug of tea, this time drizzling honey into it for some added sweetness, she glanced out of the window, at the rest of the settlement. “What if I talk to them? Tell them that there are Motharans who aren’t happy with the way the priest is acting either and are planning on doing something about it.”
“It might help, but then you would have to do something, so it is something I would only suggest that you do if you truly are ready for that.” Kamen shrugged. “Right now you’re angry and disappointed. That doesn’t mean you’re going to feel the same way tomorrow, after you’ve been to see your parents, and I wouldn’t make any definite decisions until that happens.”
Takara shook her head. “This is something I’ve been thinking about for a long time. From the time I first visited the settlement actually and that was over five years ago. Now I need to do something about the way I’m feeling, I need to start using the way I feel to change things instead of settling for them being the way they are because I’m scared, so doing something like talking to the people here will force me into doing just that.”
“Okay, if that’s really how you feel.”
“Even though I don’t want it to be it is. I was warned, more than once, that becoming a missionary would change things and I didn’t believe that. Yet it has. Maybe, if I hadn’t met a Moonjumper, I would still be able to accept that my priest is different rather than wrong, but the more I listen to his sermons the more certain I am that he is wrong. He knows nothing about the fae.”
“Neither do you, really,” Kamen said, keeping his voice soft to show that he didn’t mean any offence, but Takara didn’t find what he was saying offensive at all. It was just the truth and she couldn’t be angry with him for telling the truth. “The only people who know anything about the fae are the Moonjumpers and the few who were lucky enough to meet Emrys when he visited. Everyone else is making it up.”
“I know.” Takara reached out and touched Kamen’s paw, not wanting him to worry any longer that she might be upset by what he’d said. “Even if I learn more about the fae from the Moonjumpers I still won’t know anything about them, as it’s all secondhand information and what she’s telling me might not be the whole truth. That doesn’t change the way I feel when it comes to my priest. He’s a fraud and there are going to be people who should be in his position, but they aren’t, because they weren’t born the son of a priest.” She could hear the anger in her voice and knew that it was something she was going to have to avoid talking about when she went home, just in case. “I don’t think I should be a priestess or even a voice of the fae - have you heard about them, Kamen, because it’s something I’ve only found out about recently? I just don’t want to follow the same religion as the rest of my family any longer, because it isn’t the right one for me, and it never was. If it had of been then I wouldn’t be plagued with all these doubts now.”
“Yes, I have heard of them. We actually had one visit the settlement recently, to talk to us about our position within Motharan society, and a couple of the converts here chose to go with him. Apparently he has his own travelling community, who go with him all around Mothar, which sounded fascinating. If I hadn’t been waiting for you to return I might have gone with him, because I really do want to travel.”
“Thank you for waiting for me. I promise, one way or another, you will travel Mothar, Kamen, even if I have to smuggle you out of the settlement so you can come with me.”
“What happens if your priest doesn’t give you permission to go?”
“Once I’d have stayed, but things have change now. Even if he doesn’t give me permission I am going.” Takara sighed. “That might mean leaving everything behind for good and, as much as I hate the thought of leaving behind my family, it is my only option if I get turned down. Sadly I think it’s going to end up being what happens, because I don’t think he will give me permission, as I’m one of his ‘best’ missionaries, and he won’t want to lose me.” She shook her head. “What he doesn’t realise is that he lost me a long time ago. It’s time for me to do what I think is right for me, rather than put my family first.”
“Are you sure that’s what you want to do?”
Blinking away tears Takara nodded. “Yes, I’m sure. It’s not going to happen straight away, because there are things I want to do first, but if I stay here for too long I am going to say or do something stupid and I’d rather be travelling the world than be dead.” She sipped her tea, feeling the warmth travel through her body and give her the strength to continue. “Kamen, you don’t have to come with me. When you came here you left your family behind and I don’t want you to leave behind whatever you have here because I’ve decided that I’m going to travel Mothar.”
“Honestly the only thing actually keeping me here is you. Everything else I can walk away from, because coming here taught me something very important, Takara. When I have a chance to do something I should grab it, with both hands, and I did regret not going along with the voice of the fae when he left, but I wanted to be here for you. I know what you’ve been going through recently and I knew you’d need a real friends when you got back. So I stayed and it appears to, once again, have been the right choice, if you really are going to leave everything behind so you can travel Mothar.”
Mirrored from K. A. Webb Writing.