I can't sleep all I can do is think.
I hate when this happens, at least at home, away from this strange bed I would be comfortable wrapped in a blanket of my own thoughts.
It's certainly strange how much something like thoughts can keep you so awake when your exhausted.
I just...I have alot of things worrying me I guess.
Like will I pass any of my damn classes? was all that effort worth nothing? It doesn't help that I just found out theirs a new law in place that will extend the age of free insurance to non students from 18 to 26. SO FUCK ME RIGHT? I didn't have to do these stupid god forsaken online classes about bullshit subjects that I could give half of a rats ass about, so that just in case I happen to get sick or take a fall I'm covered by good old blue cross blue shield.
Oh yeah and how about the constant worry that I might fuck up just enough that my dearest mother will finally just tell me to pack up my shit and get out? thats not concerning at all. Noooo.
Ughhh side note, Adam's breath smells like utter shit ( I'm stuck in a bed next to him draining the last remaining power on my laptop cause I can't turn on the light to find a plug) he just turned his head to me in his sleep and is breathing heavily, the stink pouring out my way (UGGGHHH BRUSH YOUR TEETH YOUR FUCKING DISGUSTING)
like and little things like that are stressing me out too, things are just to damned frustrating at the moment, half the things in life aren't even real problems.
Like I sat in this bed for an hour and thought " what if I will never be able to get my license? What if my sensory integration disorder holds me back at that too? Is that why my eyes hurt when I try to drive? maybe I should see an optomitrist? and say what FUCK MY EYES ARE RETARDED CAUSE MY BRAIN DON'T WORK SO GOOD WITH THE REST OF MY BODY? Would I even look good in glasses? I probably wouldn't. I have a hard enough time attracting the fairer sex anyways."
and fuck if I can't get my license how am I supposed to get a job? I've been looking all over town for ages, anywhere in walking distance, and have had absolutely no luck. So unless a miracle hits me what the hell am I supposed to do.
It's certainly strange how much something like thoughts can keep you so awake when your exhausted.
I just...I have alot of things worrying me I guess.
Like will I pass any of my damn classes? was all that effort worth nothing? It doesn't help that I just found out theirs a new law in place that will extend the age of free insurance to non students from 18 to 26. SO FUCK ME RIGHT? I didn't have to do these stupid god forsaken online classes about bullshit subjects that I could give half of a rats ass about, so that just in case I happen to get sick or take a fall I'm covered by good old blue cross blue shield.
Oh yeah and how about the constant worry that I might fuck up just enough that my dearest mother will finally just tell me to pack up my shit and get out? thats not concerning at all. Noooo.
Ughhh side note, Adam's breath smells like utter shit ( I'm stuck in a bed next to him draining the last remaining power on my laptop cause I can't turn on the light to find a plug) he just turned his head to me in his sleep and is breathing heavily, the stink pouring out my way (UGGGHHH BRUSH YOUR TEETH YOUR FUCKING DISGUSTING)
like and little things like that are stressing me out too, things are just to damned frustrating at the moment, half the things in life aren't even real problems.
Like I sat in this bed for an hour and thought " what if I will never be able to get my license? What if my sensory integration disorder holds me back at that too? Is that why my eyes hurt when I try to drive? maybe I should see an optomitrist? and say what FUCK MY EYES ARE RETARDED CAUSE MY BRAIN DON'T WORK SO GOOD WITH THE REST OF MY BODY? Would I even look good in glasses? I probably wouldn't. I have a hard enough time attracting the fairer sex anyways."
and fuck if I can't get my license how am I supposed to get a job? I've been looking all over town for ages, anywhere in walking distance, and have had absolutely no luck. So unless a miracle hits me what the hell am I supposed to do.