I'm a Liar.
First off -- I want to apologize to anyone who was expecting an update on *Wednesday* night. Life got in the way, haha. I just really needed to hack it out on my own, too. Just finish it up at my own pace, and I don't know why I bother setting myself deadlines, but I'm sorry.
Hey, well -- I hope you like it. I hope it came together the way I wanted it to. I know it's pretty vague, or maybe it's not vague, maybe it seems like it's trying too hard to be vague -- But I wasn't. I didn't want to be vague, at least not to the reader, but I want you all to realize Lily had no idea what was going on then, but as she's looking back on it, she, of course, is noticing all of these things that made the situation obvious -- And I'm just rambling on, but next chapter! everything will be explained. I hope I didn't disappoint! I tried very hard not to.
To all of you who reviewed -- You know how much they mean to me, and how amazing you guys are as readers, and I don't have any responses for this chapter (I do it every other chapter, so things don't get too repetitive), but that doesn't mean I appreciate them any less. To my new readers -- God, you're incredible! I want to thank one particular (new) reader who reviewed every chapter, and was just so genuine -- Frecklednproud.
--
hope dangles on a string
like slow spinning redemption
winding in, winding out
the shine of it has caught my eye
and roped me in
so, mesmerizing
so, hypnotizing
i am captivated
i am
vindicated
i am selfish, i am wrong
i am right
i swear i'm right
swear i knew it all along
and i am flawed
but i am cleaning up so well
i am seeing in me now
the things you swore you saw yourself
so clear
like the diamond in your ring
cut to mirror your intention
oversized, and overwhelmed
the shine of which has caught my eye
and rendered me
so, isolated
so, motivated
i am certain now that i am
vindicated
i am selfish, i am wrong
i am right
i swear i'm right
swear i knew it all along
and i am flawed
but i am cleaning up so well
i am seeing in me now
the things you swore you saw yourself
so, turn up the corners of your lips
part them, and feel my fingertips
trace the moment
fall forever
defence is paper thin
just one touch
and i'd be in
too deep now to ever swim
against the current
so, let me slip away.
"Vindicated", by Dashboard Confessional.
--
i have
i have you breathing down my neck, breathing down my neck
i don't
don't know what you could possibly expect under this condition so
i'll wait
i'll wait for the ambulance to come, ambulance to come
pick us up off the floor
what did you possibly expect under this condition so
slow down.. this night's a perfect shade of
dark blue, dark blue
have you ever been alone in a crowded room
when i'm here with you
i said the world could be burning down
dark blue, dark blue
have you ever been alone in a crowded room
well i'm here with you
i said the world could be burning 'til there's nothing but dark blue..
just dark blue
this flood, this flood is slowly rising up swallowing the ground
beneath my feet, tell me how anybody thinks under this condition so
I'll swim, i'll swim as the water rises up, the sun is sinking down
and now all i can see are the planets in a row
suggesting it's best that i slow down
this night's a perfect shade of
dark blue, dark blue
have you ever been alone in a crowded room
when i'm here with you
i said the world could be burning, burning down
dark blue, dark blue
have you ever been alone in a crowded room well i'm here with you
i said the world could be burning dark blue
we were boxing
we were boxing the stars
we were boxing, we were boxing
you were swinging for Mars
and then the water reached the West Coast
and took the power lines, the power lines
and it was me and you, this could last forever
and the whole town under water
there was nothing we could do
it was dark blue.
"Dark Blue," by Jack's Mannequin.
--
when you try your best
but you don't succeed
when you get what you want
but not what you need
when you feel so tired
but you can't sleep
stuck in reverse
when the tears come
streamin' down your face
when you lose something
you can't replace
when you love someone
but it goes to waste
could it be worse?
lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you
high up above
or down below
when you're too in love
to let it go
but if you never try
you'll never know
just what you're worth
lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
i will try to fix you
tears stream
down your face
when you lose something
you cannot replace
tears stream
down your face
and i
tears stream
down your face
i promise you i will learn
from my mistakes
tears stream down your face
and i
lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you.
"Fix You", by Coldplay
--
stand up straight
do your trick
turn on the stars
jupiter shines so bright
when you're around
they tell us slow down
we're too young
you need to grow
speed's the key
and they don't know
who we are
and who's to say
that we're not good enough
and who's to say
that this is not our love
mother, don't tell me
friends are the ones that i lose
'cause they'd bleed before you
and sometimes family are the ones
you'd choose
it's too late now
i hold on to this life i've found
and who's to say
we won't burn it out
and who's to say
we won't sink in doubt
who's to say
we won't fade to grey
who are they anyway,
anyway, they don't know
and you say we're too young
but maybe you're too old to remember
and i try to pretend
but i just feel it when we're together
and if you don't believe me
you never really knew us
you never really knew
you and i, packin' up my room
we feel alright
but we're not well consumed
we'll be driving
'cause they don't know who we are
who's to say we won't stay together
who's to say we aren't getting stronger
who's to say i can't live without you
who are they anyway
anyway, they don't know
and you say we're too young
but maybe you're too old to remember
and i try to pretend
but i just feel it when we're together
who is to say
and who is to say
and who are they anyway
stand up, boy
i shine so bright
when you're around.
"Who's to Say", by Vanessa Carlton.
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