In case anybody cares about what I've learned this year
My Final paper for Acting
Now that my first year at Western has come to an end, I have found myself doing a lot of reflecting. My first year at college has been an emotional roller coaster. There are so many times when I have questioned the person that I have become and the decisions I am making. But even amid all of my uncertainty, I have always stood fast by my decision to study theatre. This year has been very hard for me, but very few people are aware of that. The only thing that has kept me going through it all has been this department, and especially the people within it. What I love most about studying theatre here is that I not only learn from the faculty, but from my peers as well. I have learned more in eight months here than in all eight years that I have been involved with theatre. Performance is my passion. It is the only thing that makes me feel alive and the only thing that I see as worthwhile to put my time and energy into perfecting. I don’t think that I can talk about how I have grown as an actress this year without also telling you how I have grown as a person because so much of my growth in that sense has been parallel. I really didn’t realize how insecure I was with myself and my acting until now, when I have the chance to look back and see how much I’ve changed. That’s what this year has been all about for me, learning to finally be comfortable, with me, both on stage and off.
I had the opportunity this year to take acting with both you and Pat, as well as the privilege of being involved with two directing scenes, and of course, the Friday Fun Days. One of the first things that I realized once my study began was that up to this point most of my acting had been simply spouting lines. Learning to actually be in the moment and feel what the character was feeling rather than simply waiting for my next line was probably the most valuable thing that I have learned. Looking back on that, it seems so silly that I never did that before, because it has become so natural for me. In Pat’s class, we worked on a lot of exercises that forced you to be aware of the space you were in. Again, this was never something I had considered before. I felt like I had been acting in a box before, which is ironic because I spent two years as a mime in high school. I was always very safe, my arms usually very heavy and useless at my side, my feet planted, and my connection to my partner was minimal. I still need to work on taking greater risks, that is so far my greatest weakness as an actress, but I have definitely come a long way. Learning to step outside of that box of insecurity on stage has been my greatest accomplishment so far. In your class, you told me that I need to learn to take greater risks. So that’s still something I need to work on. I’ve managed to conquer physical risks, but I still need to be able to step outside of my emotional box. Again, this is something I need to learn in real life as well. I know I have the capacity to experience powerful emotion, I simply need to find a way to express it. One of my friends, whom I met at the beginning of this year, told me that he noticed that I have “grown up a lot” this year. He told me that he always saw confidence in me, but now, at the end of the year, I am much more comfortable with myself and in the way I interact with others. I took that as a huge compliment and I really attribute that to what I have learned so far this year.
Most of my work here as a freshman has been auditioning, which I expected, and greatly enjoyed. Having the opportunity to audition for so many different shows has been great. I have seen each callback as a workshop during which I have the chance to learn more. I can’t think of a callback that I went to that wasn’t just an absolute blast. During callbacks, I learned how to interact with my peers, more so than in class, because there was a wider variety of people present. I know that you’ve noticed in class that I’m a bit of a touchy feely person. I’m always hugging someone, or holding someone’s hand or rubbing someone’s back. Again, this is just a testament to how comfortable I finally feel in my own skin and around other people. If you knew me my freshman year of high school, you would know that this was not the case. Being able to feel comfortable touching people has really helped me to connect to my scene partners. Acting One has taught me so much when it comes to preparing myself as an actress for performance. Learning how to do the book work, especially, has been extremely helpful. But, I have to say that most of my learning has taken place during my scene work (both for class and for the directing classes), callbacks, and Friday Fun Days. I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed those workshops and how beneficial I found them to be. It’s funny, I really didn’t think that I would have much to say for this paper, but I guess I’ve learned more than I thought. I am unbelievably grateful for my experiences this year and I can’t wait to see what next year has in store for me.
Now that my first year at Western has come to an end, I have found myself doing a lot of reflecting. My first year at college has been an emotional roller coaster. There are so many times when I have questioned the person that I have become and the decisions I am making. But even amid all of my uncertainty, I have always stood fast by my decision to study theatre. This year has been very hard for me, but very few people are aware of that. The only thing that has kept me going through it all has been this department, and especially the people within it. What I love most about studying theatre here is that I not only learn from the faculty, but from my peers as well. I have learned more in eight months here than in all eight years that I have been involved with theatre. Performance is my passion. It is the only thing that makes me feel alive and the only thing that I see as worthwhile to put my time and energy into perfecting. I don’t think that I can talk about how I have grown as an actress this year without also telling you how I have grown as a person because so much of my growth in that sense has been parallel. I really didn’t realize how insecure I was with myself and my acting until now, when I have the chance to look back and see how much I’ve changed. That’s what this year has been all about for me, learning to finally be comfortable, with me, both on stage and off.
I had the opportunity this year to take acting with both you and Pat, as well as the privilege of being involved with two directing scenes, and of course, the Friday Fun Days. One of the first things that I realized once my study began was that up to this point most of my acting had been simply spouting lines. Learning to actually be in the moment and feel what the character was feeling rather than simply waiting for my next line was probably the most valuable thing that I have learned. Looking back on that, it seems so silly that I never did that before, because it has become so natural for me. In Pat’s class, we worked on a lot of exercises that forced you to be aware of the space you were in. Again, this was never something I had considered before. I felt like I had been acting in a box before, which is ironic because I spent two years as a mime in high school. I was always very safe, my arms usually very heavy and useless at my side, my feet planted, and my connection to my partner was minimal. I still need to work on taking greater risks, that is so far my greatest weakness as an actress, but I have definitely come a long way. Learning to step outside of that box of insecurity on stage has been my greatest accomplishment so far. In your class, you told me that I need to learn to take greater risks. So that’s still something I need to work on. I’ve managed to conquer physical risks, but I still need to be able to step outside of my emotional box. Again, this is something I need to learn in real life as well. I know I have the capacity to experience powerful emotion, I simply need to find a way to express it. One of my friends, whom I met at the beginning of this year, told me that he noticed that I have “grown up a lot” this year. He told me that he always saw confidence in me, but now, at the end of the year, I am much more comfortable with myself and in the way I interact with others. I took that as a huge compliment and I really attribute that to what I have learned so far this year.
Most of my work here as a freshman has been auditioning, which I expected, and greatly enjoyed. Having the opportunity to audition for so many different shows has been great. I have seen each callback as a workshop during which I have the chance to learn more. I can’t think of a callback that I went to that wasn’t just an absolute blast. During callbacks, I learned how to interact with my peers, more so than in class, because there was a wider variety of people present. I know that you’ve noticed in class that I’m a bit of a touchy feely person. I’m always hugging someone, or holding someone’s hand or rubbing someone’s back. Again, this is just a testament to how comfortable I finally feel in my own skin and around other people. If you knew me my freshman year of high school, you would know that this was not the case. Being able to feel comfortable touching people has really helped me to connect to my scene partners. Acting One has taught me so much when it comes to preparing myself as an actress for performance. Learning how to do the book work, especially, has been extremely helpful. But, I have to say that most of my learning has taken place during my scene work (both for class and for the directing classes), callbacks, and Friday Fun Days. I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed those workshops and how beneficial I found them to be. It’s funny, I really didn’t think that I would have much to say for this paper, but I guess I’ve learned more than I thought. I am unbelievably grateful for my experiences this year and I can’t wait to see what next year has in store for me.