(no subject)
First it was to be the best student in the class, then to get straight A's across the board, then all A's on my exams, now it's just to get a "1" in every class. I remember when striving to be smart was EVERYONE'S goal. And maybe it's just because I can only focus in on one thing at a time, but slowly my class competitors have gradually tapered off and put either their friends, family, job, or smoking before school. Somehow I feel like I'm the only one that is COMPLETELY dedicated to school. And after all the long hours of homework, missing social functions, and sacrificing time with others, what has it given me? I sit here with a 3.919 GPA and a glowing college application, and yet these are the reasons people are intimidated by me and won't talk to me. Certain others feel stupid in my presence. I think I must have missed the speech that told everyone to slow down and put more important things first. I feel like my intelligence has just bit me in the ass. It's good to be proud of one's academic success, but when others are constantly comparing themselves to you, is it time to just slack off? What do I do? My friends and family are the most important things in my life, I don't want them to be intimidated by me. Moreover, is this an issue that I can fix, or is it their problem? Now I feel stupid for letting things go this far. When a person says "I don't want to hang out with you today" the last response to "why" would be "because I feel stupid when I'm around you." Did I do something? Is it time for me to slow down? Do I need to stop stressing out over every piece of homework? DO I NEED TO STOP COMPARING MYSELF TO THOSE THAT ARE SMARTER THAN I? Will people feel more comfortable then? I really never knew that there would be a time when I would resent my ability to retain information. After all, most of the classes throughout our lives have been focused on how well you can memorize a formula, historical date, or paragraph structure. There are very few that center around the uses of common sense, something that I lack completely. Please tell me why a high school student's intelligence is measured by a two-digit ACT score. Why can't it be measured by how well they balance school, friends, family, and a job. Or how often they stand up to peer pressure. Or how often they help someone out. Or how much passion and determination they put into things. After all these things are what people remember you by. These are the things that truly help you in the future. These are the things that matter.