posted in tribe but I feel a need to put it here too..
Since this is really my journal/blog/diary/brain release :D
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Thoughts on Hermes' statue and walking the path alone.
I recently posted a picture of my patron's gift a brand new statue of Him. The 'Him" I speak of is none other than Hermes. We've been tripping the road fantastic for nearly 8 years yet only in the last 4 or 5 have I or shall I say has He made himself more known. I really do love Hermes lots; He can be very supportive even when I'm feeling like a crap fest. Like nowadays this whole 'why am I alone still?" question that begs an answer already has one. I'm not ready. While I don't like to think of myself as in some weird ass holding pattern that has lasted 5 years, I can say I have GROWN. I've learned I can let go of the past if I wish it. That "burning" old memories away makes them go to sleep forever. That depression is something I will have to work on for a longer while yet but not necessarily forever; that I dig! That trying something new is scary but still damn fun to do. I have a few more steps to make before I can even be accepted to the C/O academy which has given me time to lose a lot of weight while gaining muscle and starting to have a real figure agan.
I'd have to say that losing this weight has been the biggest challenge of all because it requires PATIENCE and RESOLVE to stay on task. As a chronic procrastinator, such words are near foreign to me-why bother if no one is going to pay attention to me anyway are old thoughts slowly being silenced. Hermes, Apollon and Zeus are my patrons and biggest supporters on this path. I pay homage to them every day, in the car, when I watch the birds in the sky or when I get a smile from a guy/gal on the street. Everything is taking lots of patience and resolve to see the whole thing through and for that I gotta thank the Gods for turnng my wandering eyes back to my goal. Some day, I tell myself, some day all this hard work will pay off and the fruits will be oh so sweet, drippy, make me hungry for more! I was thinking about how alone I am in building my bus-but I'm not really you know? I have access to numerous brains to pick on ideas and pictures to borrow new ideas.
So do I have access to many places online and off to meet and mingle with others. I just go to do them as I do with my bus project-access, be there in the moment. Be me.
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Thoughts on Hermes' statue and walking the path alone.
I recently posted a picture of my patron's gift a brand new statue of Him. The 'Him" I speak of is none other than Hermes. We've been tripping the road fantastic for nearly 8 years yet only in the last 4 or 5 have I or shall I say has He made himself more known. I really do love Hermes lots; He can be very supportive even when I'm feeling like a crap fest. Like nowadays this whole 'why am I alone still?" question that begs an answer already has one. I'm not ready. While I don't like to think of myself as in some weird ass holding pattern that has lasted 5 years, I can say I have GROWN. I've learned I can let go of the past if I wish it. That "burning" old memories away makes them go to sleep forever. That depression is something I will have to work on for a longer while yet but not necessarily forever; that I dig! That trying something new is scary but still damn fun to do. I have a few more steps to make before I can even be accepted to the C/O academy which has given me time to lose a lot of weight while gaining muscle and starting to have a real figure agan.
I'd have to say that losing this weight has been the biggest challenge of all because it requires PATIENCE and RESOLVE to stay on task. As a chronic procrastinator, such words are near foreign to me-why bother if no one is going to pay attention to me anyway are old thoughts slowly being silenced. Hermes, Apollon and Zeus are my patrons and biggest supporters on this path. I pay homage to them every day, in the car, when I watch the birds in the sky or when I get a smile from a guy/gal on the street. Everything is taking lots of patience and resolve to see the whole thing through and for that I gotta thank the Gods for turnng my wandering eyes back to my goal. Some day, I tell myself, some day all this hard work will pay off and the fruits will be oh so sweet, drippy, make me hungry for more! I was thinking about how alone I am in building my bus-but I'm not really you know? I have access to numerous brains to pick on ideas and pictures to borrow new ideas.
So do I have access to many places online and off to meet and mingle with others. I just go to do them as I do with my bus project-access, be there in the moment. Be me.