to a girl I do not have the courage to ask out

[kaijubaka]

I am no handsome man, leaning a shoulder against a wall
Cocking my head to the side, saying some witty joke,

Not at all. Instead I fumble with my hands, not sure what to do with them
While I walk towards you. I am a creep,

Because I have already stroked your hair
And whispered my love to you at 3:39 A.M.

In my head I have felt the coarseness of the knuckles
On the backs of your hands and the curve of your elbow

And drawn my fingers across your bare stomach, and lain with you
Countless times though I do not even know the color of your eyes.

No, I am no charming witty rich good looking talented well liked
Boy, but I have seen myself also, muscular and thin;

I have run across the track, setting world records,
Winning trophies.

I know what it feels like to win the lottery
And grasp your love in my bare hands, afraid to let go.