(no subject)
Christmas... yay.
>.< This has always been a weird time for me. And it has nothing to do with the holiday itself, just my relatives.
Last year was a fucking miracle. We got along and had a decent time hanging out as a family. It was also a few weeks after the patriarch died and the family split in two. So... half of us were able to get along... because the others weren't there.
:/ Now, the matriarch has lost her effin mind and has been put in an 'assisted living community'. And we all know her death is looming, and the house that was the center of the family for more years than I've been alive sits empty. >.>
Weird. It's just weird. I don't know how to explain it. The whole concept feels like being dressed in a frilly dress and shuffled off to church where I try to hide behind the pews and not draw attention to myself. *shivers*
I like my family for the most part. A lot of them are fucking cool. But this gathering for holidays thing always feels so odd. And it has gotten weirder since there are no young kids anymore. Now we're all a bunch of teens/adults/kids-in-adult-disguises that get together. And all but 2 are of drinking age(or close enough only the cops care anymore).
I love the essence of this time of year, and all that... but being the black sheep in an increasingly awkward family is rubbing my fur the wrong way more and more.
Here's hoping I'm tensing up for nothing and we have another awesome time this year. It is only the 2nd time we've gathered somewhere other than the main house, so it still deserves the benefit of the doubt I guess.
Anyway, Merry Everything Everyone!
>.< This has always been a weird time for me. And it has nothing to do with the holiday itself, just my relatives.
Last year was a fucking miracle. We got along and had a decent time hanging out as a family. It was also a few weeks after the patriarch died and the family split in two. So... half of us were able to get along... because the others weren't there.
:/ Now, the matriarch has lost her effin mind and has been put in an 'assisted living community'. And we all know her death is looming, and the house that was the center of the family for more years than I've been alive sits empty. >.>
Weird. It's just weird. I don't know how to explain it. The whole concept feels like being dressed in a frilly dress and shuffled off to church where I try to hide behind the pews and not draw attention to myself. *shivers*
I like my family for the most part. A lot of them are fucking cool. But this gathering for holidays thing always feels so odd. And it has gotten weirder since there are no young kids anymore. Now we're all a bunch of teens/adults/kids-in-adult-disguises that get together. And all but 2 are of drinking age(or close enough only the cops care anymore).
I love the essence of this time of year, and all that... but being the black sheep in an increasingly awkward family is rubbing my fur the wrong way more and more.
Here's hoping I'm tensing up for nothing and we have another awesome time this year. It is only the 2nd time we've gathered somewhere other than the main house, so it still deserves the benefit of the doubt I guess.
Anyway, Merry Everything Everyone!