Phobias
I started thinking about phobias a few minutes ago. What triggered this is that I just stumbled across a picture of the moon and got fucking shivers. Like I'm creeped out thinking about it and I don't know why. I thought planets were legit as a child, I wasn't like "OHMYGODPLAAAAANNNNNNEEEETSSS<3!!!!!!!!" but I mean, I didn't have anything against them. In fact I always kind of liked Jupiter, and recently I even felt legitimately sympathetic for pluto because people don't consider it a planet anymore, which I still think is bullshit, Pluto really made the line of main planets feel conclusive. Maybe thats why I have this fear actually, because Pluto isn't part of the line-up anymore and it makes space feel all the more infinate. I mean thats a deeply routed meaning, but in all actuallity I think this fear is all Google Earth's fault. I won't lie I have an irrational fear of Google Earth. The first time I ever clicked on that earth and saw it spin around and zoom in I was seriously paralyzed. I couldn't breathe, I started sweating, my stomach flipped over like a nervous untrusting girlfriend's does when she finds out her boyfriend is cheating on her, and I shit you not I had a small tear of fear in my left eye. It makes me legitimatly naucious to think about. I think I'm more scared of watching Google Earth in action than I am of seeing a cenipede 2 inchs from my face. I don't know what that really says about me as a person, but I feel like it kind of says a lot.
I'm also scared of deep sea creatures. The ones that reside at the bottom of the ocean, in areas deep enough to where the light doesn't dare shine through. Electric fish live there...and I'm sorry...but how are they electric. How is that physically and scientificly possible? You don't see my skin just lighting up when it feels like it. How could you not think thats scary? I'm pretty sure their eye sockets (that never close because fish are creepy and God for some reason decided that they shouldn't have eye lids) even light up, and I'm not positive about this because I haven't watched the discovery channle since seeing one of those fish, and I would look it up on google to make sure I'm right about it,but just like everyone else, I'd reaaally like to sleep tonight, so I'm just going to assume their eyes light up too.
I mean think about it though, there was a fish in like japan that popped up on the surface of the water, (in pure daylight mind you, this isn't even in the deepest parts of the ocean) and it had a fucking humans face. I promise you I'm not kidding look it up on youtube. It has a nose that i'd actually die for and if I ever get plastic surgery, I'm bringing that picture of the fish in for my nose job because I want its nose. Its eyes have human depth an shape. Its cheekbones are defined. And its mouth....it could seriously be a lipstick model for Avon or Covergirl...I fuck you not...its shaped that humanly.
And lets stick to the basics....eels. These are commonplace sea creatures but they're fucking terrifying. Lets break them down shall we? They have the face of a grandmother thats seen too much pain in her life and is tired to death from all of her aquired wisdom. Placed inside its face are Will Ferrel's beady eyes. They sometimes have like fin mowhawks, and just imagine that on a human grandma...thats scary in and of itself. They light up, they have vampire fangs poking out of their wrinkled mouths. And....where the fuck...is their body. Its just one big piece of meat with no fins. no. fins. How does that nothing body support the most terrifyingly detailed face ever seen on a creature? Its got more depth and scare quality than any humans face and its supported on a lazy slab of meat body. I actually ate a sushi eel roll before, maybe to get over my fear. I shit you not, chicken doesn't taste dead to me, cow is superb, but eel...it tastes like your eating a body thats been rotting in the hot sahara sun for 12 hours then steamed for 5 minutes over a legit source of cooking heat, like an oven for instance. Its so fucking disgusting, I had to coach my mind through it because it was too expensive not to eat and in a way, it was like a car wreck. I couldn't turn away from how terrible its flavor was. I've never tasted anything sooooo fucking dead and lifeless in my life. I can't talk about it anymore. So moving on...
I'm still deathly afraid of the Baton Rouge-Shake Your Soul album cover. My sister and I used to both be afraid of it when we were little and we'd steal it from my dad's cd collection and run around shoving it in each others faces when we'd get pissed at one another. At some point in this angry game, someone would start crying and basically whoever cried from the album cover first won the fight. My dad thought it was funny to chase us into the corner of our backroom with the cd cover. That was the first time in my life that I legitimatly felt an adreniline rush and almost broke through the window just to get away from that cd cover. I haven't seen it in years and I don't ever want to see it again. It's presence in my dreams are more than enough.
I'm scared of needles too, thats pretty common though. To this day I ask the doctor to send my mom in when I'm getting shots and the nurse has to knock on the door to tell me shes comming in so that I can close my eyes and not see the needle at all. If I watch them pull it out I feel the need to run, and I really hate running a lot.
Lastly...earth worms. Their exsistance doesn't make sense, they're a-sexual and they don't fuck other worms, they just kind of form from themselves. They therefore have no relatives, they're just kind of pieces and I don't trust that. They swim around in the dirt and somehow their soft gooey almost liquidated bodies are able to push through pounds and pounds of dirt. They don't make any noises but if they did I feel like they'd make a gurggling sound. If you cut them up, your just doing them a favor because they apparently have 9 hearts so your basically just making kids for them. They're blind and yet they curl themselves upward like prarie dogs trying to see something even though they can't fucking see. I know they don't have feelings, I just know it. I don't know if they even have brains. They smell like wet dogs when it rains and they don't even have the fur or hair that a dog has in order to create that smell, they're fucking baldies. I'm seriously getting sick talking about them.
These are basically all the phobias that on a daily basis I try not to think about and just felt the need to vent about after seeing that picture of a moon. So I mean, I'm sorry to anyone that had to read it, but I actually feel better.
I'm also scared of deep sea creatures. The ones that reside at the bottom of the ocean, in areas deep enough to where the light doesn't dare shine through. Electric fish live there...and I'm sorry...but how are they electric. How is that physically and scientificly possible? You don't see my skin just lighting up when it feels like it. How could you not think thats scary? I'm pretty sure their eye sockets (that never close because fish are creepy and God for some reason decided that they shouldn't have eye lids) even light up, and I'm not positive about this because I haven't watched the discovery channle since seeing one of those fish, and I would look it up on google to make sure I'm right about it,but just like everyone else, I'd reaaally like to sleep tonight, so I'm just going to assume their eyes light up too.
I mean think about it though, there was a fish in like japan that popped up on the surface of the water, (in pure daylight mind you, this isn't even in the deepest parts of the ocean) and it had a fucking humans face. I promise you I'm not kidding look it up on youtube. It has a nose that i'd actually die for and if I ever get plastic surgery, I'm bringing that picture of the fish in for my nose job because I want its nose. Its eyes have human depth an shape. Its cheekbones are defined. And its mouth....it could seriously be a lipstick model for Avon or Covergirl...I fuck you not...its shaped that humanly.
And lets stick to the basics....eels. These are commonplace sea creatures but they're fucking terrifying. Lets break them down shall we? They have the face of a grandmother thats seen too much pain in her life and is tired to death from all of her aquired wisdom. Placed inside its face are Will Ferrel's beady eyes. They sometimes have like fin mowhawks, and just imagine that on a human grandma...thats scary in and of itself. They light up, they have vampire fangs poking out of their wrinkled mouths. And....where the fuck...is their body. Its just one big piece of meat with no fins. no. fins. How does that nothing body support the most terrifyingly detailed face ever seen on a creature? Its got more depth and scare quality than any humans face and its supported on a lazy slab of meat body. I actually ate a sushi eel roll before, maybe to get over my fear. I shit you not, chicken doesn't taste dead to me, cow is superb, but eel...it tastes like your eating a body thats been rotting in the hot sahara sun for 12 hours then steamed for 5 minutes over a legit source of cooking heat, like an oven for instance. Its so fucking disgusting, I had to coach my mind through it because it was too expensive not to eat and in a way, it was like a car wreck. I couldn't turn away from how terrible its flavor was. I've never tasted anything sooooo fucking dead and lifeless in my life. I can't talk about it anymore. So moving on...
I'm still deathly afraid of the Baton Rouge-Shake Your Soul album cover. My sister and I used to both be afraid of it when we were little and we'd steal it from my dad's cd collection and run around shoving it in each others faces when we'd get pissed at one another. At some point in this angry game, someone would start crying and basically whoever cried from the album cover first won the fight. My dad thought it was funny to chase us into the corner of our backroom with the cd cover. That was the first time in my life that I legitimatly felt an adreniline rush and almost broke through the window just to get away from that cd cover. I haven't seen it in years and I don't ever want to see it again. It's presence in my dreams are more than enough.
I'm scared of needles too, thats pretty common though. To this day I ask the doctor to send my mom in when I'm getting shots and the nurse has to knock on the door to tell me shes comming in so that I can close my eyes and not see the needle at all. If I watch them pull it out I feel the need to run, and I really hate running a lot.
Lastly...earth worms. Their exsistance doesn't make sense, they're a-sexual and they don't fuck other worms, they just kind of form from themselves. They therefore have no relatives, they're just kind of pieces and I don't trust that. They swim around in the dirt and somehow their soft gooey almost liquidated bodies are able to push through pounds and pounds of dirt. They don't make any noises but if they did I feel like they'd make a gurggling sound. If you cut them up, your just doing them a favor because they apparently have 9 hearts so your basically just making kids for them. They're blind and yet they curl themselves upward like prarie dogs trying to see something even though they can't fucking see. I know they don't have feelings, I just know it. I don't know if they even have brains. They smell like wet dogs when it rains and they don't even have the fur or hair that a dog has in order to create that smell, they're fucking baldies. I'm seriously getting sick talking about them.
These are basically all the phobias that on a daily basis I try not to think about and just felt the need to vent about after seeing that picture of a moon. So I mean, I'm sorry to anyone that had to read it, but I actually feel better.