Perhaps If He Had Opposable Thumbs ....
My cats are weird. I mean, all of my cats have been weird, because cats, but Teddy, our current handsome but nasally challenged tuxie, is weird in a way I've never run into before.
He likes his food, you see, but he doesn't really like to put his head down close to the food, either wet or dry, to get at it. I think that's because getting his nose too close to the food inhibits his ability to breath; he's chronically stuffy, something the vet says can't really be fixed.
So he's developed the habit of using a paw to flick food out of his bowls and onto the floor, which he seems to feel is an easier space from which to eat than bowls. When it comes to dry food, that's a matter of whapping nuggets out onto the floor and going after them, one by one.
But when it comes to wet food, he swipes at it with one paw, then licks the paw clean of the smelly goop. This would be kind of endearing were it not for the fact that his swipes are just as apt to throw the wet food around as they are to keep the food on his paw, awaiting consumption.
This means that over the space of a few days, every area near their food bowls, at least the section within a foot of the floor, has been decorated with dried food, necessitating me getting down on my hands and knees to clean it off the surfaces. Those include our kitchen island, the refrigerator, kitchen baseboards, the bottom section of our stove, kitchen walls ... you get the picture. I've spent a lot of time crawling around with scrub brush and/or hot cleaning rags.
Also, remember when I mentioned that he has a chronically stuffy nose, (possibly due to a deviated septum, neither we nor the vet are certain)? Well, sometimes, when he gets too stuffy, he'll shake his head violently, to get rid of nasal goop. And it, too, lands on those same surfaces. Sometimes, when his stuffiness and air that's too dry in the house combine to leave his nose just a tad bloody, then the nasal goop is bloody as well.
Eurgh. Yeah, I know, TMI.
It's a good thing I love the little weirdo.
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