When The Truth Hits
When The Truth Hits
Some weak light was passing through his eyelids. His entire body hurt. His chest burned, on the exact spot where seconds before, he had felt the blade slashing through him, like he was some kind of thing made of paper. They had left him before he had even hit the ground, mostly probably to look for Clark and Lois. Would she be able to go back? Would she be able to save them all? He thought.
It was as if he was fighting a losing battle. The dark seemed to be winning the fight; he would not be able to keep his eyes open for much longer. His eyelids were getting heavier, while the world surrounding him was still in the middle of a chaotic attack by the Kandorians. He was helpless, useless and all he could do was to listen to his own heart beating, and how it was slowly slowing down. Lying in the middle of the street, his bow discarded, so close to the where he had seen Chloe’s life leaving her body.
Maybe now, he could finally find the peace that he had sought out for so long. Maybe he would go to heaven and meet his parents again. With that thought, a blurred image from his father’s birthday suddenly flashed through his mind. He had been five at that time. His mother and him had been decorating the house, then he had helped her bake a cake. It was the fondest memory he had of his parents, from when they had truly been a family, from when he hadn’t yet lost them.
He saw his father arriving at home from work, he ran towards him, jumping on his lap, giving him a big hug, which his father returned. He could still feel the warm feeling that hug had given him, he could see his mom joining the hug, hear his father’s laughter. Feel the hug turning into a loving family embrace, feel his parent’s hearts beating with his.
It almost felt real.
It had been real.
That had been home. That had been happiness. But as suddenly as the image came, it quickly faded away.
Another blurred image started to form; he saw himself, waking up on an island. That was when he had gotten estranged there. He could smell the ocean, feel the sand under his body and the sun burning his skin. He remembered his desperation vividly, how a frequent hobby of his had turned into a life saving activity. The trials, his pride after his first bullseye.
And then, there was Tess.
Flash after flash. He saw how he had become her everything, how he had gotten scared. How he had ruined everything.
Lois came next. Him thinking he had found the one. Her breaking his heart.
He gasped, tried to clench his fists, tried to do something, anything. His breathing was becoming more and more erratic. Was it how he was going to die? Was it why his whole life was flashing before his eyes?
He had no time to ponder over those questions. Another flash. It seemed so random, compared to his previous ones.
Mission debriefing with the league. He had been observing Chloe as she had been biting her lower lip. He had noticed that she always did that when faced with concern. He had also noticed that she always seemed to frown whenever she was expecting something bad to come up.
The memory faded away and was soon replaced by another one. He was in the Clocktower. Chloe was with him, helping him to plan their next mission. She was sitting cross-legged on his sofa, doing some serious digging on his laptop, while he was ordering some food. He had been getting used to having her around at night. Despite his guilt concerning the fact that he was making her lie to Jimmy, it had really felt like she belonged there, by his side.
Another flash. The league was having a celebration dinner after a successful mission. The satisfaction of a job well done was written all over their faces. Oliver could see how everybody surrounding him was happy, but it was Chloe’s smile that caught his attention. Then, her eyes had met his. Her smile had widened, brightening up the whole room. He hadn’t been able not to smile back.
Flash after flash. All he was seeing was Chloe. Had she really had such an impact on his life? Why hadn’t he realized it before? He thought.
He saw himself with Jimmy, who was concerned about Chloe’s connection to Davis Bloome. He saw himself helping the photographer. He saw how that decision eventually caused Jimmy’s life to end. He saw the hurt, the sadness in Chloe’s eyes. He had put it there. He had done that to her. He had killed Jimmy.
He hadn’t deserved to have them as his friends. He had wanted to vanish; he always seemed to destroy everything he touched. Hadn’t he just destroyed the life of one of his best friends? Because that’s really how he had come to see Chloe as, at that time. She was the one who knew all his dirty little secrets, he also knew all of hers. Yet, they still cared for and respected each other.
He had no right to be in her life. He had no right to want her in his. So, he did what he did best, he tried to destroy himself.
He tried cutting all the ties with her. He never answered nor returned her calls. Yet, she didn’t give up on him. When everything seemed so lost, when he had hit rock bottom, a light appeared back into his life. That was Chloe rescuing him and trying to drag him out of his funk.
She approached him when he was down, fallen in an abandon alley, she took him back to his penthouse. She tried to sober him up, but he shut her down. Then, he just fell asleep. On the next day, he woke up to the smell of coffee and with the vision of her in front of him, looking at him with those big concerned green eyes. He felt guilty again. Why did she have to always make him feel that way?
All that came out of his mouth was, “I’m sorry for Jimmy. I don’t deserve your friendship. You better go.”
“Oliver, I need you now. I don’t blame you for Jimmy’s death and I could really use a friend if not that, at least an ally.” She had replied, expression neutral, but the plea in her voice had been difficult to miss.
“What’s going on?” he had asked, afraid of what had possibly happened when he had left her.
“Clark left us, Lois disappeared, and the Kandorians are showing the first signs of world domination. Their power is starting to show. I need your help to protect our people, our planet. So please, stop the self-pity party, help an old friend, let’s save this planet.”
He had looked down, unable to meet her eyes. So she had been alone the whole time? How could Clark have left her, when she had just lost her husband? It had been relatively easy not to come back to her, with the knowledge that she didn’t need him. Not when she had Lois and Clark in her life.
But now, knowing that all that time, she had been alone... God, he felt awful.
“Are sure you want my help?” he had finally asked, wondering how she could still want him as a friend after all he had done. She stared at him, he forced himself to meet her eyes.
“I don’t have anyone else, Ollie. Everyone’s gone. I need your help to find Lois, to try to create a resistance, so we can fight the good fight here. We can’t just let them take out home from us. They will end up destroying it, history repeats.” She said it, looking at him with pleading eyes.
Her answer was all it took for him to make up his mind. He would do it for the world, and for her. She had given him a second chance, he’d definitely make it up to her.
For that day on, he never really drank that much.
After he had sobered up, they had started to make a strategic plan, while the Kandorians were dominating everything around them. Together they formed a resistance force. Each day he could see how Chloe was the strength and the spirit behind it all. He admired her more and more.
One night, before a particularly critical mission, they both ended up kissing. He had initiated the kiss, unable to leave not knowing whether he’d ever be able to show her how much he cared. She had surprisingly responded to his kiss, had shown that she was still herself under that ice queen mask she’d had been forced to wear.
She hadn’t asked him why he had done it. He didn’t really understand it himself.
“You know,” she had instead said, “even if this mission is a success, this really can’t mean anything.”
He had nodded, he couldn’t have done anything else. He understood. And he didn’t want anything else. Not in this kind of world.
The mission was a success, they never talked about it again.
And now, he regretted it.
His eyes closed. He had no energy to try to open them up again. His heartbeats had slowed down considerably, breathing had become a chore. His life was really leaving his body, and it took him his last moments to realize that he had found his match in Chloe, that she was the love that he sought for so long. To think he thought that he had never found it.
But now it was too late, he had seen her die in front of him, just a few minutes ago. And now, he seemed to be taking the same direction.
Maybe it’s not too late.
A smile appeared on his lips. Hope was all he had left.
Maybe, I will meet her, maybe I can finally have my happy ending in the other world.
With that thought, Oliver drew his last breath, as his heart stopped beating.
- The end -