youre a part time lover and a full time friend
So I've been thinking about updating this for awhile now for a number of reasons really. One being something that I feel I have to update about and get out in the open. Two being Charlotte just told me to and if she can give an entry every day from Scotland I should be able to manage at least one every once and awhile. And three just being that I've wanted to start writing in my livejournal again for forever and haven't really managed to get that going yet...
Sorry Robin, I'm listening to the Juno soundtrack. I downloaded it because I liked the movie soooo much and now really like the soundtrack as well. I know you're probably dissappointed haha. But you should like the movie! It was really good! And Dwigt was in it. That should just make the movie right there. D-w-i-g-ht. We need as much of him as we can get during this writer's strike after all.
I started reading the Golden Compass. I feel a little bit like a poser reading it since only started reading it after I saw the movie and only started thinking about it when all of the hype about the movie began. So I'm not one of those people that have known the story since their childhood or anything. But Jaimie and Dan both were wicked excited when they found out it was going to be a movie and said the book was really good so when I saw it in the bookstore I decided to read it as well. Glad to report that so far the book is better than the movie. And it doesn't have that awful song playing in the background so really how could it not be?
It's really hard to believe that I've only been back in classes for a week and a half now (and we even managed to have a snow day already! Which at Northeastern is really really unheard of. This is only the second day of classes canceled in the past 12 or 13 years). At first it was so strange to be back on campus (well technically I've been on campus since July but I never actually went anywhere on campus besides the path from my dorm to the T and then the gym or dining hall). I hadn't bought books or sat in classes or any of those typical student things in eight months. Lindsay, Jerri and Chrissy are all back on campus too! Which is really exciting since they'd all been at home (or in Jerri's case, Hawaii) for their co ops. Lindsay now lives in the room where Amanda was (could not ask for a better replacement) and Jerri is coincidentally in the room directly across the hall. It feels like Kerr hall all over again except without all of the gross boys.
As much as I dislike being back with all of the readings and the papers (I've already written three... well one was for West Virginia not class but still...), I actually really like being back into the habit of being on campus. I mean I really really really loved working at Women's Lunch Place and I do miss it there a lot. But, for reasons that have to do with what I'll explain in the entry, it's been really good for me to get back here and to get into the same routine I had last year. Going back to work and giving a tour again felt really awesome. It's really good to be back. Except for my writing class. That class sucks.
Haha, so after a week and a half of class now, Brynna and I just discovered that we have a class in the same building, at the same time, on the same floor, right next to each other. I don't know how we haven't ran into each other in the hallway yet? And it's a reeeeally random building for us to have classes in. It's full of autopsy labs and health science offices. Jaimie has a class in there in the mornings. So the fact that a soc major, a comm major and a psych major all have classes in there is strange enough on its own without Brynna and I pretty much in the same class without knowing it.
Alright so now what I have to get out in the open and just out there. I'm not expecting anyone to do anything about it or even really say anything I just want to explain something that's been going on with me and taking over just huge amounts of my time and energy over the past few months and in no way am I saying is an excuse for any behavior but an explanation. If it's affected any of my conversations or plans or actions with any of you I'm really sorry. And I'm not sure what level of any of this you might already know and I might be repeating. I've already talked to some people about it on varying levels and I know Dan has told some people (since he knows pretty much all there is to know) but I don't know to what extent or to who he's told. Anyways that's enough of an introduction. So pretty much just beginning over the summer a little bit I started being sort of depressed. And then going into the fall it just got worse and worse. I started going to therapy in *thinks* October... around then. So I've been switching between therapist at University Health and Counseling and another one out in Coolidge Corner going at least once a week. Things have gotten better and worse. The happier times seem happier but the bad times just seem to be getting worse. So I called the Fenway Health Center this morning to make an appointment with a psychiatrist to see if I can get medication. Which if it happens will still take another month or longer to actually get the medication and have it start to work. But it feels like a good step in the right direction. So pretty much I just wanted to get all of this out there for a few reasons. It's just a lot to keep bottled up since it takes up so much of my thoughts every day. And I think it's better to be open about it in case I'm having a bad day it doesn't leave people thinking I'm just a bitch... which I could still be but this could be the reasoning behind it. And I'll take all of the support I can get right now. The absolute last thing I want to do is burn anyone out. I know what it was like for me last year dealing with Christine and for everyone with that and I soooooo do not want that to be the case with me. As Dan keeps telling me we're suffering from the same thing but it's the differences that not the similarities that matter. Sooooo yeah. *phew*
Sorry for the heavyness of that last part. Hmmmm. *insert joke here* Actually I'm going to bed cause it's past midnight and I have a crap load of reading to do still that I fully intend on doing while under the blankets. :-)
See Charlotte, I updated!
Sorry Robin, I'm listening to the Juno soundtrack. I downloaded it because I liked the movie soooo much and now really like the soundtrack as well. I know you're probably dissappointed haha. But you should like the movie! It was really good! And Dwigt was in it. That should just make the movie right there. D-w-i-g-ht. We need as much of him as we can get during this writer's strike after all.
I started reading the Golden Compass. I feel a little bit like a poser reading it since only started reading it after I saw the movie and only started thinking about it when all of the hype about the movie began. So I'm not one of those people that have known the story since their childhood or anything. But Jaimie and Dan both were wicked excited when they found out it was going to be a movie and said the book was really good so when I saw it in the bookstore I decided to read it as well. Glad to report that so far the book is better than the movie. And it doesn't have that awful song playing in the background so really how could it not be?
It's really hard to believe that I've only been back in classes for a week and a half now (and we even managed to have a snow day already! Which at Northeastern is really really unheard of. This is only the second day of classes canceled in the past 12 or 13 years). At first it was so strange to be back on campus (well technically I've been on campus since July but I never actually went anywhere on campus besides the path from my dorm to the T and then the gym or dining hall). I hadn't bought books or sat in classes or any of those typical student things in eight months. Lindsay, Jerri and Chrissy are all back on campus too! Which is really exciting since they'd all been at home (or in Jerri's case, Hawaii) for their co ops. Lindsay now lives in the room where Amanda was (could not ask for a better replacement) and Jerri is coincidentally in the room directly across the hall. It feels like Kerr hall all over again except without all of the gross boys.
As much as I dislike being back with all of the readings and the papers (I've already written three... well one was for West Virginia not class but still...), I actually really like being back into the habit of being on campus. I mean I really really really loved working at Women's Lunch Place and I do miss it there a lot. But, for reasons that have to do with what I'll explain in the entry, it's been really good for me to get back here and to get into the same routine I had last year. Going back to work and giving a tour again felt really awesome. It's really good to be back. Except for my writing class. That class sucks.
Haha, so after a week and a half of class now, Brynna and I just discovered that we have a class in the same building, at the same time, on the same floor, right next to each other. I don't know how we haven't ran into each other in the hallway yet? And it's a reeeeally random building for us to have classes in. It's full of autopsy labs and health science offices. Jaimie has a class in there in the mornings. So the fact that a soc major, a comm major and a psych major all have classes in there is strange enough on its own without Brynna and I pretty much in the same class without knowing it.
Alright so now what I have to get out in the open and just out there. I'm not expecting anyone to do anything about it or even really say anything I just want to explain something that's been going on with me and taking over just huge amounts of my time and energy over the past few months and in no way am I saying is an excuse for any behavior but an explanation. If it's affected any of my conversations or plans or actions with any of you I'm really sorry. And I'm not sure what level of any of this you might already know and I might be repeating. I've already talked to some people about it on varying levels and I know Dan has told some people (since he knows pretty much all there is to know) but I don't know to what extent or to who he's told. Anyways that's enough of an introduction. So pretty much just beginning over the summer a little bit I started being sort of depressed. And then going into the fall it just got worse and worse. I started going to therapy in *thinks* October... around then. So I've been switching between therapist at University Health and Counseling and another one out in Coolidge Corner going at least once a week. Things have gotten better and worse. The happier times seem happier but the bad times just seem to be getting worse. So I called the Fenway Health Center this morning to make an appointment with a psychiatrist to see if I can get medication. Which if it happens will still take another month or longer to actually get the medication and have it start to work. But it feels like a good step in the right direction. So pretty much I just wanted to get all of this out there for a few reasons. It's just a lot to keep bottled up since it takes up so much of my thoughts every day. And I think it's better to be open about it in case I'm having a bad day it doesn't leave people thinking I'm just a bitch... which I could still be but this could be the reasoning behind it. And I'll take all of the support I can get right now. The absolute last thing I want to do is burn anyone out. I know what it was like for me last year dealing with Christine and for everyone with that and I soooooo do not want that to be the case with me. As Dan keeps telling me we're suffering from the same thing but it's the differences that not the similarities that matter. Sooooo yeah. *phew*
Sorry for the heavyness of that last part. Hmmmm. *insert joke here* Actually I'm going to bed cause it's past midnight and I have a crap load of reading to do still that I fully intend on doing while under the blankets. :-)
See Charlotte, I updated!