"Stop talking to me like a three-year-old, Nick"
If there was one thing about myself that I absolutely hate and want to change, it's that everytime I'm struck by genuine worry, I come across as a condescending asshole. I don't know what it is I do, whether it's my tone of voice, my expression, or precisely the words I say, but I invariably offend people whenever I express concern. I don't like offending people in any context.
It doesn't help that I'm scared of making people angry. If I ever get the impression that somebody is angry at me, it ruins my day. I feel like complete shit. The degree of the anger doesn't even really matter. I think that because I don't anger easily at all, when someone else is angry or even annoyed at me I assume that their reaction is a lot stronger than it likely actually is.
Finally, I wish I was less annoying. I know this is something that I should have more control over, and I can even recognize most occasions wherein I'm being annoying, but every so often I am completely oblivious. I guess all of this stems from a deep-rooted fear of social rejection fostered by so many years of being a social reject.
Paaaah. Things are pretty good all around though, and I shouldn't let the things get to me that do. I can't imagine anybody that's ever not annoying at times or that never makes anyone angry, so why do I feel that I need to meet this high standard? It's like that episode of Sex and the City (+ 5,000 cool points) where Samantha is offended when Carrie says that she would never give a guy a blowjob in the office, seemingly implying (to Samantha, at least) that Carrie holds herself to a higher standard than Samantha (Flawless recap: +10,000 cool points). Does holding yourself to a higher standard than you hold others mean you think you're better than other people? I've no idea.
Oh well. I'm going to leave myself to my guilty pleasure, Shakira.
It doesn't help that I'm scared of making people angry. If I ever get the impression that somebody is angry at me, it ruins my day. I feel like complete shit. The degree of the anger doesn't even really matter. I think that because I don't anger easily at all, when someone else is angry or even annoyed at me I assume that their reaction is a lot stronger than it likely actually is.
Finally, I wish I was less annoying. I know this is something that I should have more control over, and I can even recognize most occasions wherein I'm being annoying, but every so often I am completely oblivious. I guess all of this stems from a deep-rooted fear of social rejection fostered by so many years of being a social reject.
Paaaah. Things are pretty good all around though, and I shouldn't let the things get to me that do. I can't imagine anybody that's ever not annoying at times or that never makes anyone angry, so why do I feel that I need to meet this high standard? It's like that episode of Sex and the City (+ 5,000 cool points) where Samantha is offended when Carrie says that she would never give a guy a blowjob in the office, seemingly implying (to Samantha, at least) that Carrie holds herself to a higher standard than Samantha (Flawless recap: +10,000 cool points). Does holding yourself to a higher standard than you hold others mean you think you're better than other people? I've no idea.
Oh well. I'm going to leave myself to my guilty pleasure, Shakira.