Sorry to bother you... but I think you left your knife in my back

[k_law114]

Who knows why we do the things we do? More importantly... why does it seem that the people who mean the most to us are the same people who always hurt us? Boyfriends, parents, siblings, best friends the list goes on. Why does it have to be that the people who you care the most for are the exact same people who rip out your heart, trample your dreams, and stab you in the back? Enough rhetorical questions though... so last night, I mean it started out with good intentions.Had a great time at the baseball game, it was nice out, over 80 students were there, everyone was just hanging out, having a good time, pretending that we didnt have two more months of school left and that our hardest decision to be made the next day would be what pool to go to. The baseball team ended up losing, but I dont think one person could probably tell you score, with a grill, sunshine, and some of your best friends around you it's easy to be distracted. So my girlfriends and I all left there and went to fridays for dinner. It was great as all ways, and after we went back to one of our houses. Things were good at first, but as soon as the guys showed up, things just went downhill from there. I dont feel like going into specifics, but let's just say one of my friends just wasnt considerate of my feelings concerning something and it did not turn out well. As the hours drew on, Hannah and I stayed up discussing the people in our life and why they do the things they do... and why is it that the people that we love are the people who hurt us? We both said a lot of good things, and had good reasons why we thought this process of being hurt by the best people in our lives occurs, but as the sun began to come up we were no closer to answer to the question then we were the night before. The only theory I could come up with was that when you care about someone, I mean truly care about someone, you let everything that is holding you back go. You dont put up walls or fronts or any type of defense, and you willingly let that person into your heart. When you make yourself that vulnerable you're bound to be hurt by something by someone no matter what. I'm not just talking about boyfriends or relationships for that matter, particularly friends too, and family at most times. But how to solve this problem? Shut out the people you love in order not to get hurt? That doesnt seem probable because if you truly love the person you're only self- inflicting more pain upon yourself for not taking the chance, for not letting your guard down and letting go. I don't even know... if anyone has any insight they'd like to share on why this happens, feel free to leave a comment because I really just dont know anymore...

"It's life, and it's real and sometimes it fuckin hurts... but it's life and it's pretty much all we got" ~ Garden State