Exhale

Jul 29, 2013 10:50


Originally published at kelliowen.com. Please leave any comments there.


I love dandelions. I don’t care that they’re weeds. I love blowing their dirty rotten little seeds everywhere. Because it’s pretty. It’s neat to watch. And I’m twelve.

And I’d like to be able to blow them into the wind in another twenty years.

And I’d like see my children’s children and grow old with my best friend. So… in order to exhale properly, one must inhale. And that means the nicotine has got to go.

Yep. You read that right. Even though the world’s leading lung doctor told me they look great. Even though I’m the female version of Coop when it comes to chain-smoking. It’s time.

I promised myself I’d do this some time ago. Other things happened instead. Then I promised someone else I’d do this… and even though promises get broken all too often, it’s time to keep this one.

Please forgive any snark, attitude, anger, outbursts, lashing out, or strangely calm and quite frightening behavior you may see for the next few weeks. I know some people get cranky. I’m convincing myself that I will not be like that. I’m trying to be smart about it-electronic to get rid of the other 3999 chemicals first, then lower nicotine each time. Eventually, it’ll be zero and i’ll be nicotine free.

I’ve always said I was allowed one bad habit… time for a better option.
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