What's wrong with me?

[k_2the_ablam]

Geez, I can't get my head strait. I'm starting to get annoyed and slightly angry at the fact that I can't let this slide. I was feeling so good yesterday too. I went to the gym for like two hours, shot a buttload of pool with my buddies and was feeling so good yesterday. Holy crap, how things can change with a night's sleep. I think it's just the free time that's getting to me. Waking up at like 8, and not going to work until like 11. That's three hours of nothing-ness, in which I fill up by thinking. I'm not supposed to think right now, cause I know all I'm going to think about is her. This is so fucking hard. I'm still confused though. I don't know whether to keep talking to her, or to not talk to her at all. On one hand, my feelings for her tell me to talk and keep in touch, even if only by e-mail or myspace, but every time I do, it hurts so friggin much. It has become clear that she's completely over me, or at least that's what she's trying to portray. I think that's what's hurting me the most. I hope my turn will be soon. Until then, Elton is my friend.

"I hope you don't mind
That I put down in words.
How wonderful life is,
while you're in the world."

Sir Elton John
"Your Song"