nervous
how am i supposed to say goodbye to sean in eighteen days? i mean were in the middle of bickering and fighting for no reason but im still so heartbroken that i have to let him go. im losing everything when i lose him. my life will thrown so far off. i wont know what to do without him. hes not even gone yet and i cant stop crying i can barely see enough to type. i mean yeah im so happy for him, hes going to a wonderful college and hes gonna meet so many great people and all that. he's gonna do so well. of course i want all that for him but how am i supposed to watch my best friend stay when im leaving. theres this lowe's commercial thats like "we'll prpare you for basically everything./..evertyhing but the drive home." if this is before how am i gonna be able to make it 5through to after. and its not like i have an option in going. hes my brother, best friend, confidante, hes on my team when it comes to my parents, hes the only one in the whole world that i can tell everything to. i mean yeah all my friends are amazing and wonderful but no one can possibly be my brother. i depend on him so much for everything. i know ive writeen all this before. and it seems like wow no big deal. everyon has to say goodbye to their brothers and sisters but everyone reading this knows that sean and i are not normal brother&sister. hes not a normal guy. hes a godsend. hes gotten me through every trial so wher do i go when hes not there? i would go to mr morris but we all know hes gone as well. this is gonna be a long year. and yet so short. im so nervous.