Some Fishy Anecdotes
Though I'm a little disenchanted with being a Production Designer for student films, I must say it has the potential for some amusing anecdotes, depending on the items you need for a film.
This semester's production, Stephen's 'Goldfish', is currently the holder of Mel's 'Weirdest Prop' Award. There are some scenes in which it would be horridly cruel to use a live goldfish- namely a shot with a plastic bag (with fish inside) flying across the frame, and a shot with a boy holding a fish in his hand. I had two options, well three actually. One, find a replica goldfish that looks exactly like the fish we're using. Impossible, or impossibly expensive on a student budget. Two, make a fish replica out of whatever I can find, and get shot down by Andrew. Not likely! Three, get hold of a dead goldfish.
You can guess that I decided to run with option three. The weirdest item I've had to secure is indeed a dead goldfish. An interesting task, which resulted in these two amusing phonecalls.
Phone Hussy: "Pets World- how can I help you?"
Mel: "Hi! My name's Mel, and I'm a production designer for a short film. Now this may sound like an obscure ask, but I was wondering if you had a dead goldfish. I need one for a prop, you see-"
Phone Hussy: *sternly* "No. Sorry. We don't have dead fish."
Mel: "Well, okay, if a fish of yours should die within the next few days, could you keep it in the fridge-"
Phone Hussy: "No. Sorry. We don't have fridge." *hangs up*
Mel: "YOU SUCK, FRIDGELESS HUMAN FOOL!!"
Receptionist Chick: "Hi Pets Paradise! This is Jenna speaking!"
Mel: "Heya Jenna. I'm Mel, well, this may sound like an obscure and morbid ask... but I'm a production designer for a short film and I was wondering if you had a dead goldfish. I need one for a prop because it'd be pretty cruel to use a live animal for some of our shots..."
Jenna: "Like dude, we get a dead fish eeeeeveryday. I'll go have a check now for you."
Mel: "Sweet thank you!"
Jenna: *checks tank for dead fish* "Awwwwr, we've got a half-dead one floating around- what colour did you want?"
Mel: "Uhmn... I was actually hoping for a plain gold one."
Jenna: "Damn, this one's white and gold- wait! We've got one. A plain gold one."
Mel: "Aaaah...so it's not half-dead or anything?"
Jenna: "Nah mate. He's gooooooorne."
So yes, I have a dead goldfish in my freezer presently. Only in the film industry, I swear lol.
But for now, sayounara and fare thee well!
S&Mel, Queen of Darkness and Lizards
^_^
This semester's production, Stephen's 'Goldfish', is currently the holder of Mel's 'Weirdest Prop' Award. There are some scenes in which it would be horridly cruel to use a live goldfish- namely a shot with a plastic bag (with fish inside) flying across the frame, and a shot with a boy holding a fish in his hand. I had two options, well three actually. One, find a replica goldfish that looks exactly like the fish we're using. Impossible, or impossibly expensive on a student budget. Two, make a fish replica out of whatever I can find, and get shot down by Andrew. Not likely! Three, get hold of a dead goldfish.
You can guess that I decided to run with option three. The weirdest item I've had to secure is indeed a dead goldfish. An interesting task, which resulted in these two amusing phonecalls.
Phone Hussy: "Pets World- how can I help you?"
Mel: "Hi! My name's Mel, and I'm a production designer for a short film. Now this may sound like an obscure ask, but I was wondering if you had a dead goldfish. I need one for a prop, you see-"
Phone Hussy: *sternly* "No. Sorry. We don't have dead fish."
Mel: "Well, okay, if a fish of yours should die within the next few days, could you keep it in the fridge-"
Phone Hussy: "No. Sorry. We don't have fridge." *hangs up*
Mel: "YOU SUCK, FRIDGELESS HUMAN FOOL!!"
Receptionist Chick: "Hi Pets Paradise! This is Jenna speaking!"
Mel: "Heya Jenna. I'm Mel, well, this may sound like an obscure and morbid ask... but I'm a production designer for a short film and I was wondering if you had a dead goldfish. I need one for a prop because it'd be pretty cruel to use a live animal for some of our shots..."
Jenna: "Like dude, we get a dead fish eeeeeveryday. I'll go have a check now for you."
Mel: "Sweet thank you!"
Jenna: *checks tank for dead fish* "Awwwwr, we've got a half-dead one floating around- what colour did you want?"
Mel: "Uhmn... I was actually hoping for a plain gold one."
Jenna: "Damn, this one's white and gold- wait! We've got one. A plain gold one."
Mel: "Aaaah...so it's not half-dead or anything?"
Jenna: "Nah mate. He's gooooooorne."
So yes, I have a dead goldfish in my freezer presently. Only in the film industry, I swear lol.
But for now, sayounara and fare thee well!
S&Mel, Queen of Darkness and Lizards
^_^