The range is too high
hi guys, remember me? did you delete me from your friends list? if you did, you're not reading this.
So I got into Long Beach. I'm filled with this completely OVERWHELMED feeling. I just looked at their website and then I looked at UCLA's MA requirements since I'd really like to transfer to a really good school for my MA. I basically need to get all As. Which I know I can totally do. But I'm really going to have to work hard. The thing that sucks is January I'm supposed to finally get my promotion at work and now I'm wondering if I should take it, since I'll need to be working certaintly no more hours than I already am, so I can concentrate on school. And if I'm not concentrating on school, then I have a boyfriend who I find myself wanting to spend most free moments with. And if I'm not doing any of those things, I still want to stay politically active and work on my art. The last thing I need is more hours at work... Ay. I find myself with dreams for my future so big they don't really fit beween my ears. I want to live in Europe, Vancouver, and Japan. I want to get all As and get a PHD and teach and be a really, really good teacher. I want to make really good art. I want to be good at so many things. I know it's inside me, but I worry I won't live up to my potential. I worry about that so often, you guys. On the nights when I find myself playing the sims (not even the sims 2!) and wasting hours on end when I should be studying, drawing, painting, typing up notes, reading... I wonder. I want to be better. I don't want to ever stop evolving. If I believed in god, I'd ask him for the strength. Without a higher power I can only look inside and hope the strength is there inside me.
"So now I park my car down by the cathedral
where the floodlights point up at the steeples
Choir practice is filling up with people
I hear the sound escaping as an echo
Sloping off the ceiling at an angle
When the voices blend they sound like angels
I hope there's some room still in the middle
But when lift my voice up now to reach them
The range is too high way up in heaven
So I hold my tongue, forget the song
tie my shoes, start walking off
and try to just keep moving on
with my broken heart and my absent God
and I have no faith, but it's all I want
To be loved
And believe
In my soul, in my soul, in my soul, in my soul"
So I got into Long Beach. I'm filled with this completely OVERWHELMED feeling. I just looked at their website and then I looked at UCLA's MA requirements since I'd really like to transfer to a really good school for my MA. I basically need to get all As. Which I know I can totally do. But I'm really going to have to work hard. The thing that sucks is January I'm supposed to finally get my promotion at work and now I'm wondering if I should take it, since I'll need to be working certaintly no more hours than I already am, so I can concentrate on school. And if I'm not concentrating on school, then I have a boyfriend who I find myself wanting to spend most free moments with. And if I'm not doing any of those things, I still want to stay politically active and work on my art. The last thing I need is more hours at work... Ay. I find myself with dreams for my future so big they don't really fit beween my ears. I want to live in Europe, Vancouver, and Japan. I want to get all As and get a PHD and teach and be a really, really good teacher. I want to make really good art. I want to be good at so many things. I know it's inside me, but I worry I won't live up to my potential. I worry about that so often, you guys. On the nights when I find myself playing the sims (not even the sims 2!) and wasting hours on end when I should be studying, drawing, painting, typing up notes, reading... I wonder. I want to be better. I don't want to ever stop evolving. If I believed in god, I'd ask him for the strength. Without a higher power I can only look inside and hope the strength is there inside me.
"So now I park my car down by the cathedral
where the floodlights point up at the steeples
Choir practice is filling up with people
I hear the sound escaping as an echo
Sloping off the ceiling at an angle
When the voices blend they sound like angels
I hope there's some room still in the middle
But when lift my voice up now to reach them
The range is too high way up in heaven
So I hold my tongue, forget the song
tie my shoes, start walking off
and try to just keep moving on
with my broken heart and my absent God
and I have no faith, but it's all I want
To be loved
And believe
In my soul, in my soul, in my soul, in my soul"